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Sunday, February 29, 2004
Perky Happy Fuzzy Baby Bunnies for Bush: The culmination of your endeavors
Congratulations and thanks to all of those who submitted slogan suggestions for the Bush/Cheney campaign. The tbogg judging panel made up of...me, narrowed it down to the below entries for your enjoyment and arousal (if this kind of thing does that kind of thing for you, it being a strange world and all). To all of those that whose entries were not selected, remember : it's not that you lost...you just didn't win. And keep in mind that, even though you didn't win, you still go home with the same prize that the annointed few receive, which is bupkus. Special congratulations go out to Monica Witt and Bob Clayton who each had two! entries selected.
Our grand prize winner is actually a tie between S. Schultz and the mysteriously named "nowhack" for their submission:
Bush/Cheney: Five out of nine Supreme Court Justices agree!
..which I judged to have the requisite upbeat vibe for a downbeat country. Congratulations you two wacky kids. Now for the also-rans runners-up:
Bush & Cheney: Keeping America Terrorist-Free Since Sept. 12, 2001.
--Curt Marwitz
Bush 04: Let's have a Greater Depression!
--Sean Stone
Bush/Cheney: We Will Never Forget the Lessons of 9/11. Meanwhile, Keep Shopping.
-- John MacDonald
Bush in 2004: For Everyone Who Ever Wanted to One-Up Their Father
-- Nothing Productive
Bush - Strong enough for a man but made for a woman...No WAIT!!!
-- Scott Stansberry
Are You Better Off Now Than You Were Four Y...Uh, I Mean, Than You Were Two...Um, Make That Six Mon...Well, Look, You're Doing OK, Right?
-- Doug G.
Bush/Cheney '04: Or the gays, teachers, and terrorists win!
-- Eric Brewer
Just Like Reagan - Only Dumber and Meaner
-- Eugene Oregon
Bush 2004:Deeply disturbed by what gays are doing, ignorant of what he is doing.
–- Jake Jensen
"George W. Bush: Not his father's wimp."
–- bizutti
Bush/Cheney '04 - Not Completely a Fiasco!
–- Lo Ping Wong
America: because freedom is for Canadians.
–- August Pollack
Rainy Days Mean God is Crying for a Gay Marriage Banning Amendment
–- Monica Witt
A Car in Every Garage, A Chicken in Every Pot; A Manufacturing Job in Every MacDonald's
–- Monica Witt
BUSH: A Man, a plan, a codpiece
–- Mark G
America: Alabama Writ Large.
-- Dr. BDH
The Bush administration: Come for the pasty, rich white guys, stay for the second term queer bashing!
-- Generik Wilson
No Bush-No War … Know Bush-Know War
-- David Currie
Liberty, equality, justice -- yeah, we've heard of those."
-- Bob Clayton
"About our achievements ... Look! Queers!"
– Bob Clayton
Bush/Cheney: Because the truth just isn't as much fun.
–- Laura Lewis
"Bush/Cheney, Keeping Us Safe: Terrorists will not attack us and kill 2800 innocent people on our soil and destroy the WTC and smash the Pentagon more than once on OUR watch!"
–- Rogue Planet
Thanks all. And you can pick up your goody-bags from security....
posted by tbogg at 11:22 PM
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Busy counting his mammon...
According to Drudge (I know...):
A major no-show at tonight's Academy Awards in Hollywood will be Mel Gibson.
The Executive Producer of the program, Joe Roth, asked the filmmaker of PASSION OF THE CHRIST to present an award, knowing it would create unforgettable sparks.
The LA TIMES reports that Gibson let the offer expire because, Roth says, he was afraid of being booed.
His representatives said Gibson was too busy to attend because it was the movie's opening weekend.
Yeah. And he wouldn't want to be in Hollywood where all the entertainment media is covering the Oscars when he could be out promoting his film. Makes sense.
Now Jesus has to endure another ten minutes of getting his ass kicked because Mel sinned by lying.
A saviors job is never done...
posted by tbogg at 11:00 PM
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Then and now
Workman-like direction...check
Special effects driven action....check
Previously well known story......check
Turgid dialogue....check
Average acting in black and white defined roles...check
Yeah. Titanic and LOTR: The Return of the King have more than 11 Oscars in common.
As a director, Peter Jackson will never see another Best Director nomination ever again. Count on it.
posted by tbogg at 9:42 PM
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...the most stupid, vulgar, empty mind
Is it possible that George Orwell foresaw Ann Coulter? From 1984:
Katherine was a tall, fair-haired girl, very straight, with spendid movements. She had a bold aquiline face, a face one might have called noble until one discovered that there was as nearly as possible nothing behind it. Very early in their married life he had decided--though perhaps it was only that he knew her more intimately than he knew most people- that she had the most stupid, vulgar, empty mind that he had ever encountered. She had not a thought in her head that was not a slogan, and there was no imbecility, absolutely none, that she was not capable of swallowing if the Party handed it out to her. "The human sound track" he nicknamed her in his own mind.
Creepy, ain't it?
posted by tbogg at 3:29 PM
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Two cows walk into a bar...
Brad DeLong wants some new "Two cow" explanations. Classic examples:
A Communist: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
A Fascist: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage.
An American Corporation: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
From DeLong's blog:
You have two cows.
Your rich neighbor has ten thousand cows. In an election year, he gives two of those cows to his congressman. He gives two each to his senators, and each member of his family gives two cows to the president's re-election campaign.
The following April, the government comes and takes one of your cows, and gives it to your rich neighbor.
In February, your other cow dies because someone dumped industrial waste in the aquifer. You can't sue, though, because a "no lawsuits over dead cows" clause was recently added to an omnibus appropriations bill.
The state comes and asks for your cow, because it's budget is in shambles. You don't have any cows anymore. The state takes your house.
While walking to the homeless shelter, you notice your rich neighbor putting his cows in semi trucks. "Where are these cows going," you ask a driver.
"Can't say," he replies. "It's a matter of national security."
"Seriously?" you ask, incredulous.
"Nah, just joshin' you," he says. "These here are being shipped off to an overseas cow shelter. He's tired of giving his cows to the government." -J. Lydon
****
Richard Perle: You have two cows. One is wary of you because in the past you milked it too hard, and gave the other cow a stick. So you kill both cows. No more problem. -Murph the surf
Roy Edroso from alicublog has one on DeLong's blog that is a work of art. Go read all of them.
...as for me:
Ann Coulter: There are two cows. We should invade their pasture, steal their milk, and convert them to hamburger.
posted by tbogg at 3:08 PM
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Friday, February 27, 2004
Your own personal Jesus
If you're feeling all Jesus-y this weekend but aren't interested in a theological snuff film, may I recommend the terrific Jesus of Montreal or Cool Hand Luke?
posted by tbogg at 6:05 PM
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"We're also thinking about adding a wacky neighbor...maybe a ditzy lingerie model...that would work"
Told you so
DENNIS Miller is taking a two- week hiatus from his new CNBC talk show - which is being remade while he's gone.
"The main thing we're going to do differently is to have a studio audience," consulting producer Steve Friedman told The Post. "We're not doing the 'Tonight Show' - we want it more like a nightclub, and we're looking at an audience of around 100 people a day." Miller has, thus far, worked without a studio audience - relying only on laughs from his crew.
"Dennis' comedy is terrific, and it really helps if somebody is there to respond to it," Friedman said. "I love the crew, but that's not enough."
Those union guys...tough crowd, tough crowd...
posted by tbogg at 11:03 AM
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"Mummy, put on Poppin' Them Thangs. Frenulum and I are going to glare at the hos"
Well it's Friday, which means that NRO has inflicted America's Worst Mother™ on the world yet again and we see that Meghan has now chosen to inflict her children: Maisy, Cuthbert, Frenulum, and Pope Pius XIII on the surrounding downtown area.
When we last left Meghan and the kids, a lovely, if not overly pretentious, birthday party had gone horribly awry with a mob of sugar-crazed children assaulting Mr. Meghan like a slavering mob of starving tiny tot pit bulls, tearing and rending at his flesh with their small but razor-sharp primary teeth. Fortunately Meghan's baby's daddy was packing an aerosol can of Tot-B-Gone™ mace and was able to fight them off with only the loss of two fingers and a nipple. Realizing that he is no longer welcome to spend time in what used to be his home, he now lives in his office and bathes in the executive washroom sink. He doesn't miss the squalor of home.
Now that she has become a single mother with four children, Meghan decides that the best way to protect her family is to go, as she calls it, "gangsta gangsta". Donning their freshest bling bling and hoodies from the Sean John Garanimal collection they go for a ride:
Five minutes later, freshly be-socked, everyone is strapped in the car. Off we go to the pizza joint, I load the pies in beside Paris in the jump seat, and we proceed downtown. The noise inside the car is stupendous. I imagine pedestrians wincing as we drive by, thumping and pulsing, the way people do when a car goes by blasting hip-hop.
As you can see, all of the children are packing heat ("strapped") as they cruise downtown, eating pizza and blasting crunk by hip hop artist, Raffi:
Boom-boom, ain't it great to be.. crazy? Boom-boom, ain't it great to be.. crazy?"
Although, I believe it's actually spelt: cra-zee.
Anyway Meghan and the kids are out cruising down the street in their 6-4, jockin the freaks clocking the dough when they went to the park to get the scoop, knuckleheads out there cold shooting some hoops. Cuz the Gurdons n tha hood are always hard, you come talking that trash and they'll pull your card. Which is what they start thinking when Cuthbert sees that Howard "Ghostface Gov'ner" Dean from the Eastside Maple Boyz has been tagging in their hood:
"Mummy, when is someone going to rip down all these Howard Dean signs?" Molly asks. "Can we pull them down?"
But Meghan (or Meghan G, as she now likes to known) tells the kids to chill. There is a time and a place for everything:
Oh, no." I am in the midst of delivering a little homily about respecting other people's right to express their political enthusiasms, especially for the frothing governors of small New England states, when she interrupts.
In the back of the Dodge Caravan, strapped into his booster seat, Pope Pius XIII, bored as hell and wanting to get ill, pulls out his Tec-9 and stares at the unsuspecting people on the street, his gold tooth glinting in the winter sun...
Next week--the minivan drive by.
(Thanks for the assist from my boyz in NWA...peace out)
posted by tbogg at 10:42 AM
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Thursday, February 26, 2004
This, that, and the other thing...
My dad used to say that all the time. These are just some random things that don't deserve a post of their own:
•Today I received a American Library edition of de Tocqueville's Democracy In America in the mail. I've seen so many quotes from it over the years that I don't feel compelled to read it. I figure my daughter will get some use out of it someday. Frankly...it looks pretty boring. Don't tell her though...
•Speaking of whom (my daughter, not de Tocqueville), Casey started high school track this week and it looks like she'll be running the 200. I tried to get her to pole vault, which is what I did in school, but that went nowhere fast. When I picked her up at school today she was on the football field throwing a baseball with several boys, one of whom told her that if she had tried out for baseball she would have made the freshman team. It's good to see that eight years of Little League and Pony League paid off...even if it isn't paying off in a way that I would have liked. On top of that, she has been added to a "Select" soccer team made up of 14-year old girls from Southern California that will be playing in a college coaches showcase tournament in Las Vegas in a few weeks. All of these things remind me of the fact that she's ten times the athlete I ever dreamed of being.
•Despite the warnings of some readers, I'm reading 1984 anyway. It's not great, but at least it's an easy read. And it's raining here in San Diego so what else am I going to do?
•In reading so many articles about Mel Gibson's movie (you know which one) I keep coming across the devout types who like to say, "We're all sinners" to which I have to reply: speak for yourself, buddy. At least until after I've made hot monkey love simultaneously (difficult...not impossible) with a couple of leggy supermodels, after which you can call me anything you want.
•I know more about women's bras than most women. Someday I'll explain why, and isn't that like the coolest tease ever?
•I think that Magglio Ordonez, Albert Pujols, and Carlos Beltran are all better ballplayers than A-Rod, which is probably one reason why no one has ever offered me a General Managers job.
•When I was younger, my friend Peter and I went dove hunting in Imperial Valley on Labor day. If you're not familiar with Imperial Valley, it's the desert between San Diego and Yuma, and around that time of year the temperature in El Centro runs about 105 degrees or hotter. After a full day of hunting we headed home and when we arrived back at Peter's parent's house we discovered that his parents were having a formal dinner party. We went in through the kitchen in the back because, for obvious reasons, we were dirty and sweaty and didn't want to interrupt the adults. Upon hearing us in the kitchen Peter's mom called out to ask Peter how it went. After he yelled back that we had a good day, she asked if I was with him. When Peter said yes, she said, "Well, come introduce Tom to our guests."
Walking into the formal dining room we found a long table around which were seated a very distinguished group of older people with the men in tuxedos and the women in formal dresses much like I had only seen in movies. Did I mention that Peter's family was quite wealthy? I should have, because that would explain why I was introduced to, among others, Barry Goldwater and Alan Simpson. Yeah. Those guys. As they say, long story short: we spent the next twenty minutes or so interrupting the party and talking hunting with the gentlemen which included a trip to the kitchen to see the dove that we had shot that day. And all I could think about the entire time, when I talked to Barry Goldwater and took him outside to see my new shotgun was: my dad voted against you...you're supposed to be nuts.
But he wasn't nuts. He was a pretty cool guy.
And that's my Barry Goldwater story.
•Someday I'll tell you about my interviews with both Spiro Agnew and Don Zimmer when I was a senior in high school, but I bet you'd rather hear about the bras.
Now I have to go rest up. Tomorrow is America's Worst Mother™ day.
posted by tbogg at 10:37 PM
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Too good to save
I have over three hundred emails so far for Happy Bushco Slogans but reader Mark sends in one that he attributes to Leonard Earl Johnson that I just love. It's not what I was looking for, it's better:
"A Jobless Recovery is like Waterless Rain"
Isn't that breathtakingly brilliant?
posted by tbogg at 8:52 PM
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When November rolls aound...
Don't forget the smiling white guys.
He-Man Women's-Rights Haters Club.
posted by tbogg at 2:01 PM
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Lying beneath a grunting Orson Scott, Mrs. Card grimaces and fantasizes about Carmen Electra...
Roy at alicublog ponders the other worldly prose of Ender's daddy:
Card: In the first place, no law in any state in the United States now or ever has forbidden homosexuals to marry. The law has never asked that a man prove his heterosexuality in order to marry a woman, or a woman hers in order to marry a man.
Any homosexual man who can persuade a woman to take him as her husband can avail himself of all the rights of husbandhood under the law. And, in fact, many homosexual men have done precisely that, without any legal prejudice at all.
Ditto with lesbian women. Many have married men and borne children. And while a fair number of such marriages in recent years have ended in divorce, there are many that have not.
...and I say, "Good for Karen Santorum for sticking it out and bearing seven children for Rick while enduring a cumulative 19 minutes of bleak loveless missionary sex". Oh that this country should have more of her hearty self-denying breed....
posted by tbogg at 1:58 PM
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I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me: Paranoia Edition
Speaking of overweight radio-blowhards with addictive personalities (see below), here's Rush complaining about what he thinks are drug surveillance vans:
“When a phone company truck shows up and parks in front of our building, we scram. We don't know who's in that truck. We don't know what devices are in that truck, but we say, ‘Uh-oh we're getting outta here because they're going to screw it up.’”
and here's Rush making less sense than usual:
“Where do you go to find moderates? Somebody tell me. Is there one central place where these people hang out? Do they hang out in bowling alleys? Do they hang outlet(sic) in brie cheese and white wine nightclubs?”
" Brie cheese and white wine nightclubs"?
...and people think he's off the hard stuff?
posted by tbogg at 1:38 PM
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I imagine using "Ramblin' Gamblin' Man" as his 'bumper music' is out...
Denied a spot on Celebrity Poker Showdown (which is on that gay network), Bill Bennett has opted to do a radio show instead:
The new radio program entitled Bill Bennett's "Morning in America" will be broadcast live from Washington every weekday from 6:00 a.m. to 9:00 a.m. (Eastern) via the Dallas-based Salem Radio Network (SRN), which already features such nationally known talk hosts as Mike Gallagher, Dennis Prager, Michael Medved and Hugh Hewitt among others.
If I'm not mistaken, that would give him the coveted 3:00 a.m. to 6:00 a.m. spot in San Diego, which is probably a good time slot since he's creepier than Art Bell anyway.
posted by tbogg at 1:26 PM
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Gary Bauer supports hot lesbian sex...and you should too.
Josh Mashall has the details.
Christian conservatives line up to see Bound and Mulholland Drive.
posted by tbogg at 10:47 AM
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If it's all the same to you, we'd rather go to Cuba
I don't want to go to Libya. No one wants to go to Libya.
Cuba. That's where we want to go.
Thanks.
posted by tbogg at 10:35 AM
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I think it was clearer in the original english
I've pointed out before that Peggy Noonan was once an "adjunct professor of journalism at New York University". Hopefully she didn't teach her students to write anything like this:
America is now a country--it was not always--in which people feel free to hold whatever private views on all human groups and behaviors while bowing to the moral necessity to show respect and regard for all groups that are different, in whatever ways.
As she says (twice): whatever...
posted by tbogg at 10:24 AM
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"Okay. When she enters stage left you say, 'Yeah yeah. Unh unh.' Then cross your arms, cock your head, and look bad. Okay? Got that? Mr. Diddy?"
Puffy-Diddy does Broadway:
PREVIEWS for "Raisin in the Sun" are only a month away, but our insiders swear that Sean "Puffy" Combs has yet to read the script. "He thinks it will be easy to remember and is too busy right now," our production source says. The producers are so worried about Combs' ability to handle the rigors of Broadway that they're casting his understudy very carefully. "Puffy signed on for a 15-week run," notes our mole, "but it's eight performances a week. Not many professional actors can handle that, much less Puffy." A rep for the show, which starts April 26 at the Royale, said simply, "That is not true."
15- week run. Yeah. Right.
Good lord. Audra McDonald who is a professional's professional is co-staring with him.
posted by tbogg at 9:36 AM
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$2.19 for regular unleaded in my neighborhood this morning
Remember before the 2000 election when people said it was a good thing that Bush & Cheney were oilmen (well, bobody said successful oilmen) and that would mean more and cheaper oil because of their connections with the oil-producing countries and their knowledge about energy policy and yadda yadda yadda?
Guess those folks were wrong.
Motorists face gasoline shortages as well as record prices the next few weeks because of the skintight U.S. refining and distribution network.
The vulnerability of that network, combined with low inventories of both gasoline and the crude oil from which it's made, have the government and energy experts increasingly nervous that some places in the USA will run out of gas temporarily. An accident that has disrupted shipping on the Mississippi River and in the Gulf of Mexico could trigger shortages this week.
"It looks like the big bulk terminals in Florida are going to run out in the next few days," Tom Kloza, analyst at the Oil Price Information Service, said Wednesday. Big gasoline suppliers were warning their customers of imminent Florida shortages and reduced allocations, he said. The Coast Guard said it had reopened some of the channel Wednesday, but a backlog of ships remained.
posted by tbogg at 9:28 AM
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Two weeks from now we'll be watching Starsky & Hutch and laughing about this...
Well, I'm pretty much done with Mel Gibson's Jesus Christ: The Passion for a $20 Million Opening Day. But here is a clear and lucid post about the whole hoopla from Byzantium's Shores with some lines that I think we can all relate to:
I really would rather not see this film in the company of people who, I suspect, are -- at least in large part -- the kinds of folks who aren't comfortable being Christians unless you know that they're Christians, and better ones than you. I just want to see the thing as a movie, and I doubt that's going to be possible anywhere other than my living room once it shows up at BlockBuster.
Besides, if I want to go get a Butterfinger, I don't want to be tripping over them as they writhe in the aisles ...
posted by tbogg at 9:19 AM
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Wearing the pants in the family....
Apparently one of the other side-effects of Cialis, besides that pesky 4-hour erection (I mean, what are you going to do with that?) is uncontrollable aggression as witnessed in James Lileks' writings today. After showing Jasper (that's his dog...not another lispy child. If it was a child it would have a cute bug name like "Tick" or "Chigger" or "Japanese Dynastid Beetle") that he is the alpha dog, James goes on a rant about coarsening the culture and shows off a remarkable amount of knowledge about female anatomy and sexual practices that I'm sure he doesn't practice with Mrs. Lileks, who is a lawyer and would probably sue him for divorce if he just tried something like that, buddy, so put it back in your pants.
Anyway, we have to ask: Do you kiss your child with that mouth, pal?
posted by tbogg at 9:03 AM
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Wednesday, February 25, 2004
So you won't have to...
For those of you who have the good taste to avoid the kausfiles for the last month, here is your update:
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
Edwards
Kerry
NY Times
Kerry
Kerry
LeHane
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
[ But he was in Vietnam-ed. Well allright then!]
Kerry
Kerry
NY Times
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry's wife
Kerry
I wish I had hair.
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
[ And 'playbook'?-ed. Timeless.]
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
God. I'm lonely.
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
John Ellis
Kerry
Kerry
Edwards
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry's wife
Kerry
Kerry
Kerry
Dean
Dean
Kerry
Kerry
Rinse, repeat...
posted by tbogg at 7:13 PM
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God doesn't like it when you rattle your Goobers® bag...
Flashing light at Drudge:
KAKE TV in Wichita, Kansas set report to a woman, in her 50s, suffered a heart attack during a morning screening of Mel Gibson's controversial film PASSION OF THE CHRIST. "She later died at the hospital," a station source tells the DRUDGE REPORT. The report is scheduled to be lead story on the station's 5 PM news. "She went into seizure during one of the film's most dramatic moments," a station source explains. The woman attended a 9:30am screening at Warren East Theaters in Wichita... Developing...
...and turn off your damn cell phone. I can't hear the Aramaic...
posted by tbogg at 1:35 PM
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Things to do in Denver when you're anti-Semitic
For todays sermon, please turn to the book of Jew Bashing:
A billboard unveiled on Ash Wednesday, the same day that a controversial movie depicting the last hours of Jesus Christ premiered, is sparking criticism from people of all faiths.
The large-size outdoor marquee, which sits on the property of the Lovingway United Pentecostal Church at Colorado and Mississippi, says, "Jews Killed The Lord Jesus" and the word "Settled!"
The Anti-Defamation League asked for the marquee to be changed because it is anti-Semitic, but the church only amended the billboard slightly by removing the word "settled" and attributing the line to biblical Scriptures.
That, however, is still not appeasing critics.
"Immediately, I picked up the phone and called the pastor and had a spirited but good and respectful discussion with him in which I tried to explain to him that that kind of message is divisive and exactly the kind of message which has fueled anti-Semitism for thousands of years," said Bruce DeBoskey, the Mountain States Regional Director for the Anti-Defamation League.
Jewish leaders say that like Mel Gibson's new movie "The Passion of the Christ" -- which opened Wednesday morning -- the passage will stir up anti-Semitic attitudes and will cause some people to lash out at Jews.
The Colorado Council of Churches also tried to get Pastor Maurice Gordon to change the sign but he refused and wouldn't even answer the phone or answer the door, 7NEWS reported.
In related news, the Lovingway United Jewbashers defeated the Our Lady of Perpetual Tithing's Crusaders 34-27 in Christian league basketball action....
posted by tbogg at 12:55 PM
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Bilmon vs. the Shriverhumpernator
Bilmon wins.
posted by tbogg at 12:41 PM
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Hi. I'm Scott. I be lying to you today. Our catch phrase of the day is.....
"sacred institution"
Go here...then type 'sacred institution' into your Google bar and click on your Google highlighter.
Pretty colors!
Here's the best of Scotty (not counting twelve other instances where he used the term "institution"):
MR. McCLELLAN: John, the President has always firmly believed that marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman. He has always held that view. And I think what you're referring to is that the President has talked about how states have the right to enter into their own legal arrangements. And that's what the President is referring to.
...
MR. McCLELLAN: The President's view was very well-known during the campaign of 2000, that he believes marriage is a sacred institution. And he supported efforts to protect and defend the sanctity of marriage
...
MR. McCLELLAN: The President is going to continue to fight to protect the sanctity of marriage. I think you have to look at this in the context of recent events. We cannot pretend that the events in Massachusetts or San Francisco are not happening. And that's why the President is providing leadership, and making a decision based on principle. And he will continue to talk about the importance of protecting this sacred institution.
...
MR. McCLELLAN: What I'm telling you is that the President has always believed marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman; that it should be an institution that is protected. And that's what the President has always made very clear. John was talking about a change, and I don't see that.
...
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, this debate centers on marriage, and the definition of marriage. And some people have sought to redefine this sacred institution. And that's why the President has come out strongly in support of protecting the sanctity of marriage.
...
MR. McCLELLAN: I think he defined marriage. He believes marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman. That's how he would define it.
...
MR. McCLELLAN: I think that you have some 38 states -- this issue is about marriage, Elisabeth. This is about the definition of marriage, and he believes strongly that it is a sacred institution, and that it's important to protect it.
...
MR. McCLELLAN: Marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman. I don't know how I can make it more clearly that the President has said that repeatedly.
...
MR. McCLELLAN: And again, I said that he's always viewed marriage as a sacred institution between a man and a woman. And I will keep -- I would point back to some of what he said in terms of the -- one, I'm not accepting the premise the way you stated the question -- but point back to what he said in his remarks when it came to the issue of other states having to recognize laws of other states.
...
All this in 36 minutes.
Afterwards, a weary and shaken Scott McClellan was institutionalized...in a sacred one, of course.
(Added): The Demagogue caught McClellan staying on message before.
posted by tbogg at 12:05 PM
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Lemme guess who the two were....
Supreme Court.... goverment subsidizing religion.....
The Supreme Court, in a new rendering on separation of church and state, voted Wednesday to let states withhold scholarships from students studying theology.
The court’s 7-2 ruling held that the state of Washington was within its rights to deny a taxpayer-funded scholarship to a college student who was studying to be a minister. That holding applies even when money is available to students studying anything else.
“Training someone to lead a congregation is an essentially religious endeavor,” Chief Justice William Rehnquist wrote for the court majority. “Indeed, majoring in devotional theology is akin to a religious calling as well as an academic pursuit.”
[...]
Justices Antonin Scalia and Clarence Thomas dissented.
“Let there be no doubt: This case is about discrimination against a religious minority,” Scalia wrote for the two.
“In an era when the court is so quick to come to the aid of other disfavored groups, its indifference in this case, which involves a form of discrimination to which the Constitution actually speaks, is exceptional.”
When exactly did Christians become a "religious minority" and a "disfavored group" in the United States? I must have missed class that day.
posted by tbogg at 11:28 AM
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Later, they got a room and did some transformative lovin' of their own...
Mel meets Bill and theology ensues:
"TOLERANCE" [Rich Lowry]
I thought Mel Gibson was good on the O'Reilly Factor, even if he seemed a little worn down. One thing caught my ear. He said that what he had learned from the whole experience is "tolerance." That was the wrong word. What he really meant is that he has learned love and forgiveness. As he said later in the interview, he loves his critics, even if he doesn't like them. When O'Reilly said that he forgives his own "enemies?"but doesn't love them, Gibson tried to explain that that isn't enough, that if you don't love them, you will be consumed by their hatred. This is a profound point that gets at a phenomenon much deeper than mere "tolerance," especially as that word is thrown around today. Gibson was talking about the transformative power of love.
...which can be acquired with a a good flogging...and maybe a nice box of Godiva.
posted by tbogg at 10:05 AM
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And we should give rich people another tax cut, because this is going to be really hard on them....
Alan Greenspan just put his tongue on the third rail:
Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan urged Congress on Wednesday to deal with the country's escalating budget deficit by cutting benefits for future Social Security retirees. Without action, he warned, long-term interest rates would rise, seriously harming the economy.
In testimony before the House Budget Committee, Greenspan said the current deficit situation, with a projected record red ink of $521 billion this year, will worsen dramatically once the baby boom generation starts becoming eligible for Social Security benefits in just four years.
He said the prospect of the retirement of 77 million baby boomers will radically change the mix of people working and paying into the Social Security retirement fund and those drawing benefits from the fund.
"This dramatic demographic change is certain to place enormous demands on our nation's resources - demands we will almost surely be unable to meet unless action is taken," Greenspan said. "For a variety of reasons, that action is better taken as soon as possible."
Ka-boom!
posted by tbogg at 8:57 AM
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Meanwhile, in Colorado, Marilyn Musgrave discovers the secret of 'fire'. There is much celebration and feces flinging...
Teresa Kerry has more faith in the fundies than I do:
``I think culturally we're going through a huge change,'' Heinz Kerry said. ``I look at it in a human context because I have friends in those situations, and it's terrible. All we owe people is dignity, respect and civil rights. I think the country will evolve.''
posted by tbogg at 8:24 AM
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This would probably explain IKEA...
From the Borowitz Report:
Within ten years of marriage, Dr. Cranborn added, a significant number of married men stop having sex with women altogether.
“There’s only one way to describe someone who does not have sex with women, does not hit on women, and spends his free time shopping for furniture,” Dr. Cranborn added. “That word, to be scientific about it, is gay.”
(Thanks to Issac for the link)
posted by tbogg at 8:12 AM
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Tuesday, February 24, 2004
No dude. We'll look totally cool. Go put on the Creed CD. I'll set up the webcam...
Two dinks who love Jonah Goldberg.
Nothing like wasting a perfectly good CBGB t-shirt on a white-bread & mayonnaise fratboy.
posted by tbogg at 10:45 PM
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Perky Happy Fuzzy Baby Bunnies for Bush
The new and improved Ben Shapiro (see the picture: happy! shiny! unsullied by a woman's hoo-ha!) thinks the President (white guy, Christian, sometimes doesn't show up for work...that guy) needs a good slogan:
This message needs to be honed and emphasized. The new slogan adopted by the Bush administration -- "Steady Leadership in Times of Change" -- needs to go. The slogan aches of uncertainty and fear. It sounds like an investment ad. The Bush administration needs something bold, optimistic and colorful: "A new American sunrise." Or "America rising." Or "America on the ascent."
Let's help, okay?:
"America! It's not just for heterosexuals any more...Okay. Actually it is..."
"If you're reading this, 9/11 wasn't so bad now, was it?"
"America: Where everyman is a Burger Structural Engineer ...now"
"Bush 2004:Less jobs! More free time to surf porn..."
"I lead. You follow. Why think?"
"It's morning in America...and only Jenna Bush is hungover"
"America: It's SuperHalliburtonExxonDOMAdocious!"
"Bush and Dick. The way God intended."
Holy Jonah Goldberg in a Speedo! I smell a contest.
Email me your perkiest Bush/Cheney slogan and I'll post the best of the best on Sunday night. Remember it has to be cheerful like Rush on a Hillbilly Heroin binge and shiny and sparkly like Mickey's Kaus' head. Just put Banalities for Bush in the subject...and, hey, let's keep it clean, okay? Also let me know if you want your name published.
Winner gets a dream-date with Neil Bush...but then, who hasn't had one of those?
posted by tbogg at 10:25 PM
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Catering by George
Tim Noah on George the Fundamentalist's Bitch:
...Bush is doing the courts' work for them, declaring the Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional while at the same time portraying himself as judicial activism's victim. He's like Cleavon Little in that scene from Blazing Saddles where he whips out his gun and takes himself hostage. In fact, it's his fundamentalist supporters who've taken Bush hostage, and they couldn't be less interested in helping Bush remain consistent about the proper role of the federal government. The only real belief animating this political discussion is the bigoted one that homosexuality is an abomination. President Bush may not subscribe to that belief, but he's more than happy to cater to it.
posted by tbogg at 9:22 PM
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You get the audience you deserve...
The reviews are in and all the church-going folks whose churches bought out screenings loved it:
"I'd give it 10 stars. It's one of the best movies I've ever seen in my life," said Maritza Castro, 32, who had tears streaming down her face as she left a preview screening for church groups at the Magic Johnson Theater in Harlem.
"I knew from the Bible that he did take a beating. I didn't know how intense," she said.
"The movie just . . . made me feel like I was part of that crowd [at the crucifixion], like I was there . . . So much so that my chest is just caved in. It's awesome."
Tom Schoenherr, 48, an assistant dean at Fordham Law School, attended a screening sponsored by the American Bible Society at the Loews 84th Street Theater on the Upper West Side.
"Having read the story, to see a dramatic portrayal of it was just amazing," Schoenherr said.
He said he wept during scenes showing Mary's devotion to Jesus, but there were also times he had to avert his eyes from the often-bloody depiction of the last hours of Jesus' life.
[...]
Peter Trautmann, 32, a campus minister from Manhattan, said the movie was "excellent, overwhelming."
"I cried through much of it," he said. "It's a very accurate, powerful, visceral experience."
In other news, 100% of the men coming out of a stripper bar in Passaic called Lil' Darlin's House of Headlights agreed that "boobs are pretty cool".
posted by tbogg at 8:13 PM
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I got nailed by Jesus...
Since McDonalds passed on the Happy Meal action figures from Mel Gibsons The Passion: Ow...! Jesus Christ! That Hurts! Gibson had to find another merchandising angle to pick up a little extra mammon.
A particularly popular item is a pendant fashioned from a single nail made of pewter and attached to a leather strap, say officials of Bob Siemon Designs, which is licensed by Gibson’s Icon Productions to produce jewelry tied to the film. The pendants represent the nails used in the film to fasten Christ to the cross.
“This thing has turned into this kind of overnight phenomenon that we can’t believe,” Siemon said. He said his staff is working 10- to 14-hour shifts six days a week to keep Christian bookstores supplied with the pendants, crucifixes and other items.
Ooo-ooo. Pretty goth, eh? These might come in pretty handy for picking up unsuspecting Jesus chicks.
For those keeping score at home, add the above movie name to the following:
Lethal Jesus: The Double Cross.
Lethal Jesus: That's Funny, You Don't Look Savior-ish
Lethal Jesus: 2 Fast 2 Jewish
Jesus Christ, Superhype
Pop 'n' Lock Jesus: Electric Messiah
Passion: A Date with Lethal Jesus
Jesus Christ: Jerusalem Nights
The Passion: God Money I'll Do Anything For You
Crouching Jesus, Hidden Agenda
Jesus Christ--Beat Me, Hurt Me, Make Me Recite the Psalms
Jesus Christ: Aramaic Graffiti
Jesus Christ: We Were Saviors Once...And Hung
Jesus Christ: 8 Simple Rules About Crucifying My Savior
Jesus...I'm exhausted...
posted by tbogg at 7:53 PM
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Totalitarian sodomy-loving cohorts and other interesting demographic groups
Andrew Sullivan has become Gay Marriage Central today, and Andy is posting lots of good letters (scroll up and down).
It will be interesting to see if he wakes up tomorrow and declares that he won't vote for President Gay Go Away.
posted by tbogg at 3:13 PM
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Gonna be a busy day.
I'll be back tonight....
In the meantime... Dare To Slack
posted by tbogg at 9:08 AM
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"Most enduring institution..."
That is, unless you're Neil Bush.
In the annals of embarrassing presidential relatives, Neil Bush is no Billy Carter or Roger Clinton.
But his messy divorce has produced some eye-opening disclosures.
Among them: He had sex with women who showed up uninvited at his hotel rooms in Asia; he had an affair and may have fathered a child out of wedlock; and he stands to make millions from businesses in which he has little expertise - including a computer-chip company managed in part by the son of former Chinese president Jiang Zemin.
It seems certain opportunities tend to present themselves when your name is Neil Bush.
For his part, Bush defended the fees he has received for consulting jobs. But he gave little insight into whether the women who offered him sex in Hong Kong and Taiwan were perhaps paid by mysterious benefactors.
posted by tbogg at 8:32 AM
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Burning down the Log Cabin
Let's see how they tapdance around this one:
President Bush backed a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage Tuesday, saying he wants to stop activist judges from changing the definition of the "most enduring human institution."
Marriage cannot be severed from its cultural and moral roots, Bush said, urging Congress to approve such an amendment.
The Log Cabin Republicans don't have anything new up on their site, but they do have this dated 2/11/04:
“Writing discrimination into the Constitution is wrong. It is not conservative, it is not Republican, and it will not strengthen America,” said Log Cabin Executive Director Patrick Guerriero, in response to the President’s possible support of an anti-family Constitutional amendment.
“As conservative Republicans, we are outraged that any Republican—particularly the leader of our party and this nation—would support any effort to use our sacred United States Constitution as a way of scoring political points in an election year,” Guerriero said.
Candidate Bush promised in 2000 to be a “uniter, not a divider.” The effort to write discrimination into our Constitution with an anti-family amendment would divide America.
Candidate Bush ran as a compassionate conservative. There is nothing compassionate about discriminating against part of the American family. And there is nothing conservative about tinkering with our Constitution.
Candidate Bush ran as a governor who supported Federalism and states’ rights. This anti-family amendment runs counter to both those principles. And it runs counter to what Vice-President Cheney said during the 2000 campaign. Instead of allowing each state to decide this issue on its own, the President is pushing a purely political proposal to appease the radical right.
I assume that this may change how they will vote in November. That is, as second-class citizens, if they're still allowed to vote.
posted by tbogg at 8:27 AM
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Monday, February 23, 2004
...and there was great rejoicing throughout the land...
The archives are back.
Down there...on the left...below the mailbox.
yea.
I have also added a new section on baseball blogs down below. As much as I love baseball (which is a lot) I will try and refrain from posting about it here. There is nothing funny or snarky about baseball.
It is the only true faith...
posted by tbogg at 6:23 PM
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The non-apology apology and "I'm the victim here, dammit!" statement of Rod Paige
Wow. Even by the lowered standards of the Bush Administration, this is pretty breathtaking:
U.S. Secretary of Education Rod Paige today issued the following apology for his remarks about the NEA.
"It was an inappropriate choice of words to describe the obstructionist scare tactics the NEA's Washington lobbyists have employed against No Child Left Behind's historic education reforms. I also said, as I have repeatedly, that our nation's teachers, who have dedicated their lives to service in the classroom, are the real soldiers of democracy, whereas the NEA's high-priced Washington lobbyists have made no secret that they will fight against bringing real, rock-solid improvements in the way we educate all our children regardless of skin color, accent or where they live. But, as one who grew up on the receiving end of insensitive remarks, I should have chosen my words better."
I assume that one of those "insensitive remarks" included the word fraud.
posted by tbogg at 5:55 PM
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Gay people making the slope really really slippery
How embarassing for our state. Here's Gov. Shriverschtupper on gay marriage:
"In San Francisco, it is license for marriage of same sex. Maybe the next thing is another city that hands out licenses for assault weapons and someone else hands out licenses for selling drugs, I mean you can't do that," Schwarzenegger said Sunday on NBC.
[...]
Newsom said on CNN's "Late Edition" that there was no basis for comparing laws on gay marriage to gun control.
"It's not about AK-47s," he said. "It's not about these other hypotheticals. It's about human beings. It's about human dignity. ... It's about, I think, holding truth, faith and allegiance to the Constitution."
posted by tbogg at 3:28 PM
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The Scotty Follies: Duck and Cover Edition
The Press having fun, poking Scott McClellan with pointy sticks:
Q On the 9/11 Commission, why -- you've indicated that the President has agreed to a private meeting with the co-chairs of the commission. Why is the President unwilling to meet with the entire commission? And why, at this point, is he unwilling to provide public testimony? What's his position on this?
MR. McCLELLAN: A couple of things. One, let me get to the first part of your question. The chairman and vice-chairman of the 9/11 Commission sent a letter requesting a private session with the President. The President agreed to the request. We believe that all the necessary information could be provided in that private meeting. In terms of the actual details, we are still discussing those details for that private session with the chairman and vice-chairman. That's where it stands at this point.
Q How is that going? (Laughter.)
MR. McCLELLAN: It's ongoing; it's going.
Q It doesn't appear like he is willing to sit down to offer testimony to the entire commission, and I'm wondering why not?
MR. McCLELLAN: I think the President believes that all the necessary information they need can be provided in a private session.
Q Why --
Q Then why is he appearing?
Q Why -- hold on, Helen. What about -- why not a public session?
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, I think that he feels that everything can be provided in that private meeting, that's why.
Q Right, but they apparently feel differently, so --
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, I'm not sure -- speaking for the entire commission, but the chairman and vice chairman requested the private meeting. And that's what we're moving forward on discussing with them right now.
Q Would it be inappropriate, in your view, in the President's view, for him to offer testimony under oath to this commission?
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, look, the President will be pleased to talk to them in a private session. And that's where it stands right now.
Q So you're not answering the oath question?
MR. McCLELLAN: I'm sorry?
Q You're not -- does he think it's inappropriate to be under oath for something like this?
MR. McCLELLAN: The President is going to share with them what information he knows, and he's pleased to do it.
Q So he'll do it under oath, if necessary?
MR. McCLELLAN: I don't know if that's necessary. I think he can accomplish it all in private meeting, and provide the commission the necessary information in that format.
Q But he's -- but he's against anything being made public?
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, I don't know that I said that. They will obviously have a private meeting with him and have an opportunity to discuss with the President information that is relevant to their work.
Q Can they share that testimony then?
MR. McCLELLAN: And we're working all the details. I don't know the specifics, David, of all the details that are involved in this. Obviously, we still are able -- we're still working to discuss those details with them. But, certainly, this is information that they would use in preparing their report to the American people. So I expect that they would share information.
posted by tbogg at 3:18 PM
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I told you so
Tom Toles
posted by tbogg at 1:54 PM
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The speed of lying
Like a cancer it grows.
First, suspect website FrontPage Magazine publishes an anonymous posting from a Marine chat net supposedly by a "retired Marine Master Sergeant who was in S-2, 3rd Bn, 1st Marines, Korea in 1954.".
Although this urban myth has been debunked at snopes, an obscure blogger picks up on it, and adds to the mix by linking to POW/MIA scammer Ted Sampley of whom John McCain once said:
"I strongly caution reporters who may be contacted by or are interested in Mr. Ted Sampley and the various organizations he claims to represent, and his opinions on the subject of Senator Kerry, or any subject for that matter, to investigate thoroughly Mr. Sampley's background and history of spreading outrageous slander and other disreputable behavior before inadvertently lending him or his allegations any credibility.
"I am well familiar with Mr. Sampley, and I know him to be one of the most despicable people I have ever had the misfortune to encounter. I consider him a fraud who preys on the hopes of family members of missing servicemen for his own profit. He is dishonorable, an enemy of the truth, and despite his claims, he does not speak for or represent the views of all but a few veterans. The many veterans I know would think it a disgrace to be considered a comrade or supporter of Ted Sampley."
Then Glenn Reynolds, who checks out sources like Bill Janklow slows down for stop signs, runs with it.
...and that's how lies get spread.
The point being, Reynolds should at least do a minimum of research before posting, as opposed to his standard UPDATE: "Whoops. My bad." if he want to remain credible.
He does want to be credible, doesn't he?
(I see Oliver Willis already did the legwork on this. Damn. I could have been reading Non Sequitur instead)
posted by tbogg at 1:30 PM
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Jihad Day at the Big Brothers and Big Sisters picnic
Joseph Farah, one of Richard Mellon Scaife's flunkeys, has a breathless expose on dangerous, five language-speaking Manchurian-First Lady wannabe, Teresa Heinz Kerry:
If John Kerry becomes president, the first lady will have a track record of support for the causes of radical, anti-American groups - including Islamists, terrorist-defense law firms, abortionists and homosexual activists - that, by comparison, would make much of the country nostalgic for the days of Hillary Clinton, a study of her philanthropy patterns by Joseph Farah's G2 Bulletin concludes.
One of heiress Teresa Heinz Kerry's favorite charities is the Tides Foundation, a 28-year-old grant-making institution that funds to the tune of hundreds of millions radical groups that, among other things, protest the U.S. invasion of Iraq, demand open U.S. borders, provide the legal defense of suspected terrorists and promote the spread of Islamist ideology in the U.S.
Heinz Kerry, worth an estimated three-quarters of a billion dollars, working through the Howard Heinz Endowment, oversaw the donation of more than $4 million to the Tides Foundation between 1995 and 2001, reports G2 Bulletin, a premium, online intelligence newsletter published by WorldNetDaily.
Gasp!
Let's look at who the Tides Foundation has been supporting (.pdf records from 2002):
Big Brother Big Sisters of America $1,000,000
Central Valley Health Network $275,000
Council of Community Clinics $200,000
Educational Fund to Stop Gun Violence $694,554
Emory University $1,000,000
Forest Stewardship Council- Canada $127,857
Global Fund for Women $236,898
Harm Reduction Coalition $560,000
NAACP $584,897
National Tropical Botanical Garden $125,000
Ojai Valley Community Nursery School $3,000
PEN/Faulkner Foundation $1,500
Rainforest Action Network $119,138
Sacramento Living Wage Campaign $30,000
Seattle Rotary Service Foundation $1,500
St. Francis Xavier Action Youth Center $1,000
Swinomish Canoe Club $3,000
The Algebra Project $136,001
Womens Sports Foundation $100,000
There are 43 pages listing recipients of grants like these from the Tides Foundation. Over $58 million in grants awarded.
Why do these people and Teresa Heinz Kerry hate America?
posted by tbogg at 12:12 PM
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For his service to his country, Lt. Bush received the coveted Croix de Barcalounger....
What did you do in the war, Daddy?
John Kerry: Lieutenant (junior grade) Kerry was serving as an Officer-in-Charge of Inshore Patrol Craft 94, one of five boats conducting a Sealords operation in the Bay Hap River. While exiting the river, a mine detonated under another Inshore Patrol Craft and almost simultaneously, another mine detonated wounding Lieutenant (junior grade) Kerry in the right arm. In addition, all units began receiving small arms and automatic weapons fire from the river banks. When Lieutenant (junior grade) Kerry discovered he had a man overboard, he returned upriver to assist. The man in the water was receiving sniper fire from both banks. Lieutenant (junior grade) Kerry directed his gunners to provide suppressing fire, while from an exposed position on the bow, his arm bleeding and in pain and with disregard for his personal safety, he pulled the man aboard. Lieutenant (junior grade) Kerry then directed his boat to return to and assist the other damaged boat to safety. Lieutenant (junior grade) Kerry's calmness, professionalism and great personal courage under fire were in keeping with the highest traditions of the United States Naval Service.
George Bush: The 69-year-old president of an Atlanta insulation company said Bush showed up for work at Dannelly Air National Guard Base for drills on at least six occasions. Bush and Calhoun had both been trained as fighter pilots, and Calhoun said the two would swap "war stories" and even eat lunch together on base.
Calhoun is named in 187th unit rosters obtained by the AP as serving under the deputy commander of operations plans. Bush was in Alabama on non-flying status.
"He sat in my office most of the time — he would read," Calhoun said. "He had your training manuals from your aircraft he was flying. He'd study those some. He'd read safety magazines, which is a common thing for pilots."
Unfortunately for Lt. Bush, no Purple Heart was forthcoming for that hemorrhoid.
Now there's a "war story".
posted by tbogg at 11:20 AM
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First they came for the technical support people....
It's nice to see that some of the readers of the Corner are so farsighted:
From a reader:
I happen to work at a company that layed off a dozen technical support workers and replaced them with an Indian service.
It was most unfortunate that these people lost their jobs, and my heart went out to them. At the same time, however, aggressive cost-cutting helped stabilize our business during a shaky period. Stockholders saw we were serious about increasing profit margins, and bought accordingly. Our stock has risen 60% in the past eight months.
The remaining three thousand employees of the company have benefited greatly. We still have jobs, the company has a very viable future, and most of us are going to have more discretionary income from raises and rising stock prices. Occasionally sacrifices need to be made for the good of the team. As Spock would say, the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one. And as to the people out of work, they have been provided with employment services and job training. It’s not a great situation, but their prospects are better here in the U.S. than anywhere else in the world. In the big picture ‘outsourcing’ isn’t necessarily a dirty word. Any CEO that ignores it is in peril of losing their business, period, which would mean a helluva lot more people out of work.
And what happens when the shareholders want to see even larger increases in profit margins next year?
The economic Darwinists are so cute while they still have their jobs...
posted by tbogg at 10:50 AM
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The Quayle standard
National treasure Calvin Trillin compares former National Guardsman Dan Quayle to someone else who hid out from Vietnam.
Mr. Quayle denied receiving preferential treatment, but he didn't quibble about what making it into the guard meant at that time. "Obviously, if you join the National Guard, you have less of a chance of going to Vietnam," he said on "Meet the Press" some time later. "I mean, it goes without saying." That's presumably what Colin Powell had in mind in "My American Journey" when he wrote, "I am angry that so many of the sons of the powerful and well placed . . . managed to wrangle spots in Reserve and National Guard units."
But in the current furor about George W. Bush's military record it seems to be taken for granted that Mr. Bush got into the so-called Champagne unit of the Texas Air National Guard through influence. The stories begin by saying he was jumped over a 500-man waiting list. Then they quickly go on to investigate the details of his sojourn in Alabama. Using influence to get into the guard and therefore out of Vietnam is no longer disqualifying for "sons of the powerful"; it's assumed. Or could it be that Dan Quayle is judged by stricter standards than other politicians?
posted by tbogg at 10:22 AM
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Ignoreland
In light of this:
Democratic officials issued a statement Sunday saying Nader has promised McAuliffe he will not criticize the Democratic nominee, but rather focus his candidacy against the Bush administration.
Nader acknowledged the pledge but said it does not mean he will refrain from criticizing Democrats if they attack him. “I’m not going to avoid responding,” he said.
I'm taking a tip from a few other blogs and I'm just going to ignore Nader for the time being.
I just hope I can do it.
posted by tbogg at 8:32 AM
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Sunday, February 22, 2004
Attack of the chickenhawks
If the Bush administration wants to attack John Kerry over his commitment to the military couldn't they have found someone with a bit more courage and credibility than Saxby Chambliss?
Sen. Saxby Chambliss said during a conference call arranged by the Bush campaign that Kerry has a "32-year history of voting to cut defense programs and cut defense systems."
When Kerry responded later, at his side was Max Cleland, a triple-amputee Vietnam veteran who lost his Senate seat to Chambliss in 2002 after being portrayed as soft on homeland security.
He said the president "decided once again to take the low road of American politics."
"Saxby Chambliss, on the part of the president and his henchmen, decided today to question my commitment to the defense of our nation," Kerry said in Georgia, one of 10 states choosing electoral delegates on March 2.
[...]
Kerry also defended his military record during an interview taped Saturday for broadcast Sunday morning on ABC's "This Week."
"I don't know what it is that all these Republicans who didn't serve in Vietnam are fighting a war against those of us who did," the Massachusetts senator said.
Kerry has campaigned on his Vietnam combat record, which includes three Purple Hearts, a Bronze Star and a Silver Star.
[...]
Cleland, a Democrat, had some criticism for Chambliss.
"For Saxby Chambliss, who got out of going to Vietnam because of a trick knee, to attack John Kerry as weak on the defense of our nation is like a mackerel in the moonlight that both shines and stinks," he said.
Read more about Chambliss here.
And here's some more on Chambliss:
Poor Saxby Chambliss. He has a bad knee.
In fact, his knee is so bad he told his draft board on two occasions in the 1960s that he was unable to serve in the military during the Vietnam War. This was after he'd already sought a student deferment so he could attend law school.
But fortunately, time is a healer, and these days, the Republican Senate candidate's knee seems to be a-OK. In his campaign appearances -- including several with George W. Bush -- Saxby looked vigorous and strong, striding to the podium without the slightest indication of a limp.
On the other hand, Chambliss' Democratic opponent, Sen. Max Cleland, doesn't have any knees. They were blown off, along with his right arm, in a grenade explosion during the siege of Khe Sanh after he volunteered to serve his country as an Army officer. Max received the Bronze and Silver stars for his service in Vietnam.
But these facts haven't stopped Chambliss from viciously attacking Cleland's patriotism.
In a recent press release, Chambliss accused his opponent of "breaking his oath to protect and defend the Constitution" because Cleland had voted "yes" on a routine Chemical Weapons Treaty amendment allowing inspectors from neighboring nations like Syria and Iran to serve on U.N. inspection teams in Iraq. What makes Chambliss' bizarre attack all the more frustrating is that the bipartisan ratification of the amendment was unremarkable in its impact on national security, a mere footnote in the grand scheme of the war on terrorism.
Former U.S. Sen. Bob Kerrey, who himself lost a leg in Vietnam, called Chambliss' remarks "a shocking slap in the face not just to Max, but to all veterans." And he was right. I feel compelled to defend Cleland, not because of any shared ideology, but because we share a common bond. I may never have faced the horrors of combat, but I am a veteran of the United States Army, one who gladly volunteered to serve his country. Chambliss would do well to learn that if you attack one of us -- especially one of our wounded -- you have attacked us all.
Then again, based upon his qualifications as a coward, Chambliss is the ideal spokesman for AWOL George and Dick "I had other priorities" Cheney.
posted by tbogg at 11:55 AM
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Me and my Arrow
And speaking of movies (see below)...if you've got kids or you are a kid or you want to be a kid....
The Point
..finally available on DVD on 3/23.
Music by the late great Harry Nilsson.
Cool.
posted by tbogg at 11:27 AM
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Angels with dirty faces ...or "What's that on your head?"
Instead of celebrating Ash Wednesday this week with a smudge on your forehead and a trip to see Mel Gibson's Jesus Christ: 8 Simple Rules About Crucifying My Savior why not buy a copy of Martin Scorsese's The Last Temptation of Christ?
posted by tbogg at 11:21 AM
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Win $10,000!!!
Via Jo at Democratic Veteran we see that $10,000 is just a remembrance away.
Okay, so the USO actually gets the money, but you'll get the pleasure of knowing that you've put an end to "gutter politics" and "cheap smear tactics"...at least until Rove reveals his Kerry commercials or Ann Coulter next opens her mouth, whichever comes first.
posted by tbogg at 10:43 AM
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But then, I prefer dogs to people anyway...
Wouldn't this have been a better day if we had awakened to find that Spot was running for President and Nader had been put down?
posted by tbogg at 10:32 AM
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Oddly enough his old Internet address was hotfinchonfinchaction.com
Hey. I believe the guy:
Upstate New York Republican Gary Finch wants to know what happened to his Web site.
Somehow it became a link to porno on the Internet. The state Assemblyman says earlier this month, someone took over his old Internet address.
Instead of linking constituents to news releases and information about the state Assembly, Web surfers were offered hardcore pornography.
Finch says the state police are investigating. The lawmaker now has a new Internet address -- www.garyfinch.net. He says the new site has tamer fare, like a reading contest for kids.
Here's a picture of Assemblyman Finch reading a story to the kids at Emily Howland Elementary School. The story that particular day was the old Dr. Seuss favorite: Green Eggs and Butt Plugs.
posted by tbogg at 12:36 AM
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Friday, February 20, 2004
Don't know why I find this funny...
.. but I do. (warning sound)
(Link via The Gamers Nook)
posted by tbogg at 10:17 PM
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President Adjective
This ought to cheer up your weekend:
And here's the most stunning line from Pew's report on the new poll :
The most frequently used negative word to describe Bush is "liar," which did not come up in the May 2003 survey.
Back in May, when asked for one word descriptions of Bush, 52 percent of those surveyed used positive words like "honest," "leader," and "good." That number has fallen to 36 percent, which is the same percentage of registered voters whose most frequent words to describe Bush--in addition to "liar"--are now "arrogant," "stupid," "incompetent," "dishonest," "idiot," and "ass." ("Cowboy" has fallen off the list since the May survey.)
Those are the printable ones.
posted by tbogg at 6:20 PM
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For those keeping score at home
537: Votes that George W. Bush won Florida by according to Kathleen Harris.
548: American deaths in Iraq since the war began.
Just in case any Nader followers still think that Gore = Bush.
posted by tbogg at 2:16 PM
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Splitting hairs with the queen of split-ends
Le skank doesn't like being called a liar:
Liberals are hopping mad about last week's column. Amid angry insinuations that I "lied" about Sen. Max Cleland, I was attacked on the Senate floor by Sen. Jack Reed, Molly Ivins called my column "error-ridden," and Al Hunt called it a "lie." Joe Klein said I was the reason liberals were being hysterical about George Bush's National Guard service.
I would have left it at one column, but apparently Democrats want to go another round. With their Clintonesque formulations, my detractors make it a little difficult to know what "lie" I'm supposed to be contesting, but they are clearly implying – without stating – that Cleland lost his limbs in combat.
Let's go to the tape:
Bush's National Guard service is the most thoroughly investigated event since the Kennedy assassination.
Besides Watergate, Iran-Contra, the Tower Commission, and a little 60 million dollar investigation into a blowjob (when Ann knows perfectly well that they can be had for $5 and a Happy Meal). Verdict: Lie.
Thirty years ago, Bush was granted an honorable discharge from the National Guard, which would seem to put the matter to rest.
Well, not really:
Perhaps more striking is how often serious questions of misconduct have been flat-out ignored. John Allen Muhammad, convicted last November for his participation in the D.C. sniper shootings, served in the Louisiana National Guard from 1978-1985, where he faced two summary courts-martial. In 1983, he was charged with striking an officer, stealing a tape measure, and going AWOL. Sentenced to seven days in the brig, he received an honorable discharge in 1985.
We'll chalk that one up to stupidity instead of lying.
Ann: To put this in perspective, by 1973, John Kerry had already accused American soldiers of committing war crimes in Vietnam,
Reality: I would like to talk, representing all those veterans, and say that several months ago in Detroit, we had an investigation at which over 150 honorably discharged and many very highly decorated veterans testified to war crimes committed in Southeast Asia, not isolated incidents but crimes committed on a day-to-day basis with the full awareness of officers at all levels of command....
They told the stories at times they had personally raped, cut off ears, cut off heads, taped wires from portable telephones to human genitals and turned up the power, cut off limbs, blown up bodies, randomly shot at civilians, razed villages in fashion reminiscent of Genghis Khan, shot cattle and dogs for fun, poisoned food stocks, and generally ravaged the countryside of South Vietnam in addition to the normal ravage of war, and the normal and very particular ravaging which is done by the applied bombing power of this country.
We call this investigation the "Winter Soldier Investigation." The term "Winter Soldier" is a play on words of Thomas Paine in 1776 when he spoke of the Sunshine Patriot and summertime soldiers who deserted at Valley Forge because the going was rough. Kerry was relating other's testimony making Coulter's claim... a lie.
Ann: Cleland wore the uniform, he was in Vietnam, and he has shown courage by going on to lead a productive life. But he didn't "give his limbs for his country," or leave them "on the battlefield." There was no bravery involved in dropping a grenade on himself with no enemy troops in sight.
We'll leave aside the statement about Cleland "dropping a grenade on himself" which we know is a lie that Ann could have cleared up by doing more than her usual five minutes of research. But there was bravery in what Cleland did in Vietnam;
During his service in uniform, Max received the Silver Star Medal, one of the highest awards that can be given for gallantry in action. Listen to this citation:
“Captain Cleland distinguished himself by exceptionally valorous action on 4 April 1968 … during an enemy attack near Khe Sanh.
“When the battalion command post came under a heavy enemy rocket and mortar attack, Captain Cleland, disregarding his own safety, exposed himself to the rocket barrage as he left his covered position to administer first aid to his wounded comrades. He then assisted in moving the injured personnel to covered positions.
“Continuing to expose himself, Captain Cleland organized his men into a work party to repair the battalion communications equipment, which had been damaged by enemy fire.
“His gallant action is in keeping with the highest traditions of the military service, and reflects great credit upon himself, his unit and the United States Army.”
Those are not my words. That’s Uncle Sam talking.
And four days after that incident that earned him the Silver Star came the grenade explosion that so grievously wounded him. --Zell Miller
You see Cleland earned his Silver Star for bravery in the field, and not for losing his limbs picking up someone else's grenade. He was already a hero years before Bush jumped to the top of the TANG list and hid out in the National Guard prior to going AWOL.
Equating Max Cleland's service with George Bush's lack of the same isn't a lie. It's idiocy.
posted by tbogg at 1:56 PM
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If it's Friday...
It must be Atrocity Day:
Bypassing Senate Democrats who have stalled his judicial nominations, President Bush will use a recess appointment to put Alabama Attorney General William Pryor on the 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals at least temporarily, government sources said Friday.
The White House began informing senators Friday afternoon of Bush's intention, said one Senate source, speaking on condition of anonymity.
Two White House officials, also speaking on condition of anonymity, confirmed Bush's plan to install Pryor, and said a paper announcement was likely Friday afternoon.
After senators were informed by the White House, Pryor went to the federal courthouse in Montgomery, where he was expected to be sworn in by U.S. Circuit Judge Ed Carnes in a private ceremony.
[...]
Pryor, 41, is a founder of the Republican Attorneys General Association, which raises money for GOP attorneys general. At his confirmation hearing, he said he had not lobbied tobacco companies or companies under investigation by his office, but Democrats said they had documents showing Pryor may have been involved in some fund-raising activities.
Here's more on Kill Bill:
While Pryor argues that child convicts should be put to death with dispatch, he fervently draws the line at fetuses. "I will never forget January 22, 1973, the day seven members of our highest court ripped the Constitution up and ripped out the life of millions of unborn children," Pryor said in 1997. Indeed, he opposes abortion in almost every instance, including rape and incest. Pryor even backed a ludicrous bill in the Alabama legislature that would have appointed a lawyer to act as a guardian ad litem for the fetus of any woman considering an abortion.
His views haven't mellowed over time. "Abortion is murder and Roe v. Wade is an abominable decision," Pryor said last year. "I support the right to life of every unborn child."
Once those fetuses reach term, though, Pryor washes his hands of them, especially if they are poor or black. As attorney general he tried to undermine a consent decree aimed at improving Alabama's notorious state child welfare system, which stored troubled kids in abusive foster homes and wretched psychiatric wards. When asked about his maneuvers to shirk the requirements of the consent decree, Pryor cloaked it in the addled rhetoric of states rights. "It matters not to me whether the actions would leave children unprotected," Pryor said. "My job is to make sure that the state of Alabama isn't run by federal courts. My job isn't to come here and help children."
posted by tbogg at 12:09 PM
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I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me: Equivalency Edition
I think Rush is finally coming to grips with his where he ranks in the criminal hierarchy:
“The reason my medical records were seized is because there's a sense of desperation at the state attorney's office to get me on something, since this whole thing blew up and it's now known that immunity was given to known cocaine traffickers.”
Well, just so we know where you stand...
posted by tbogg at 11:38 AM
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It's not the spotlight, it's not the candlelight...
Bush twin Not-Jenna is coming out of her shell:
On Friday, Feb. 13, photographs of First Daughter Barbara Bush flopping like a wet noodle over the arm of Ecuadorian socialite Fabian Basabe at Sette on Seventh Avenue appeared on the front pages of the Daily News.
And into our usual Manhattan morning cup of steamed Schadenfreude fell a few drops of dismay, followed by a stiff chaser of nostalgia: for Amy Carter reading quietly in the Oval Office; for Susan Ford writing a column for Seventeen; even the quaint courtship of Julie Nixon and David Dwight Eisenhower II.
"Barbara is hot," Sette owner Bobby Malta excitedly told The Observer. "She’s a great dancer, she loves to party—she’s the perfect guest. I wish she’d come every night!"
"Barbara Bush was the sparkler on the soufflé," said publicist and society editor R. Couri Hay, who helped organize the party. "It added a lot of pizzazz; it was a special moment. The young social set got a close-up look at Barbara—they all loved her. She’s not boring. She’s not Chelsea Clinton. Although Chelsea is coming into her own right now …. "
Immersing yourself in the club scene at age twenty-one isn't an easy thing to do and can only be mastered by years of practice drinking and advanced partying techniques. Fortunately for Not-Jenna, it's in her blood...
(Thanks to tbogg gossip-hawk Anna)
posted by tbogg at 11:29 AM
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I also have twelve good buddies, I'm a virgin, and I like wood. Did I mention my stigmata?
Jim Caviezel, star of Mel Gibson's buddy-pic, Jesus Christ: We Were Saviors Once...And Hung, says that, well, really, it was typecasting:
James Caviezel, who plays Christ, said he got an equally eerie sign six months before he auditioned when a stranger came up to him and said, "You'll be playing Jesus."
Caviezel noted his initials are J.C. and was 33 - the same age as Jesus when he was killed. He said he's had fans bow down before him, and shrugged off the hardships of playing the physically demanding part.
"We're not called to the easy life," he said. "You either carry your cross, or you're crushed under the weight of it."
Other actors with J.C. initials include James Caan, James Coco, Jackie Chan, and Jim Carrey but he already made Bruce Almighty and didn't want to get stuck in the whole "playing God" thing over and over again.
(Added) Greg at The Talent Show has a little problem with Jesus verisimilitude.
posted by tbogg at 11:07 AM
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The mirror has two Mummies...
Is it Friday already?
Okay. If you're like me (and I'm sure you are, only a little bit taller) you've been waiting breathlessly all week to see if America's Worst Mother™ has finally snapped. Last week, you remember, Meghan was attempting to lure her children Peltandra, Sharona, Assiago, and Nit into The Bath of Swirly Pretty Waters of No Return when she was suddenly struck by the fact that what was pushing her over the edge wasn't her children (not that they're helping matters much) or her estranged husband, but the neighbors. Particularly that bitch, Capable Mother with her fancy-schmancy hamburger & noodle casseroles and her working toilets. At that point Meghan began cleaning her 223-caliber semiautomatic John Muhammad Signature Model™ Bushmaster rifle with big plans for making the neighborhood into a quieter more Meghan-friendly environment.
Well, sometime between last Friday and today Meghan's personality split into two very distinct halves represented by a hectoring devil on one shoulder and a slatternly but overachieving mother on the other:
"You implied it. Let me refresh your memory: 'The tyranny of birthday parties, like Soviet totalitarianism, has its origins in utopian happy-think. The road to Chuck E. Cheese is paved with good intentions.'"
"Well, it is. Dreadful place."
"So you admit it! Given your assertion that birthday parties are akin to Stalinism, or to hell, or both, I hope you will agree that logic dictates that such an enlightened person as yourself obviously would never throw a large, lavish birthday party for your ? what's that sound?"
"Nothing."
"Is that -- is someone singing?"
"I don't think so."
[There is a pause, in which small background voices can be clearly heard belting out "Happy Birthday to You."]
"Oh, that singing."
"Just as I thought. You're just as soppy and spineless as the next mother. You complain about other people throwing extravagant parties for their birthday boys and girls, but when it comes to precious little -- which precious is it this time?"
(With competing personalities arguing in her head and with a very specific mention of "the precious" I suppose I should make an obligatory mention of Gollum from Lord of the Rings...but I'm not going to because I never read the books, okay? So let's just try and stay on topic please....)
Anyway, Meghan has gone all Sybil on us and now the children of the neighborhood are at risk:
"You said eighteen children before."
"Four of them are mine."
" -- Fourteen families, then. And they bought presents, and wrapped them, and they drove through heavy traffic, and circled the block looking for a place to park, and handed their treasured three- and four-year-old cargo to you and what do you do? You whip their children into a frenzy with all this freeze-dancing, pass-the-parcel birthday nonsense, you fill them with sugar ? "
"I haven't!"
" -- practically sending them into diabetic shock ? "
So this is her plan. In a fit of life imitating art Meghan will deny the neighbors their children leaving them like the families of Sam Dent in The Sweet Hereafter only she won't kill the kids in a bus crash. Oh no, that would be too quick. Meghan wants it to be slow. Unfortunately Meghan underestimates the modern American child's capacity to consume massive amounts of sugar with no ill effect other than vibrating at speeds that would make a hummingbird woozy, and her plan goes awry and the children go berserk:
"The thing is, Molly wants to start her own business making cakes. She's done up a little stack of hand-lettered business cards, and everything, and I thought that for the greater entrepreneurial good of Molly and Shelly, for the greater convenience of me, and for the greater birthday fun of Violet, who is after all a social person, that we could have a one-time blowout, invite her whole class, and -- "
[There is another pause. In the background, children can be heard shrieking in a rhythmic fashion reminiscent of the fatal scenes in Lord of the Flies.]
At this point the long absent Mr. Gurdon makes, what turns out to be, an ultimately tragic appearance, stumbling in from another night of cheap booze and even cheaper women. Led by Assiago, the embittered Gurdon children and their diminutive guests assault the philandering boozehound:
"Uh-oh, I think they've got my husband! Yes, there's his face -- hello darling -- oops, now it's gone. He's -- he's submerged under a seething wave of nursery-school children, like Gulliver -- "
Oh, the humanity! Meghan Gurdon in her desire to inflict pain on the neighborhood has instead set in motion what can only be described as a Tiny Tots Theater production of Suddeny, Last Summer in her living room, with her husband in the role of Sebastian Venable.
Next week: Morphine for Daddy and Antipsychotics for Mummy.
posted by tbogg at 9:59 AM
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Thursday, February 19, 2004
A little help here? Thanks.
I'm not a writer and I don't pretend to play one on my blog, but I do have an abiding respect for anyone who can not only write well but make a living at it. So when I hear about someone like Evan Morris who could use a little help, well, I think it's neighborly to pitch in. Here's Evan's story:
A funny thing happened last week. Actually, it wasn't funny at all. A few months ago I started getting strange stomach upsets when I ate, sort of a weird bloating effect that hurt a lot and kept me up all night when it happened. Then it started to happen more and more frequently, eventually nearly every day, so I did what any rational person would do: I pretty much stopped eating. Bad idea. I lost 15 pounds over the course of two months or so and the pain just got much worse, until finally Mrs. Word Detective, who had been trying to get me to go to a doctor for quite a while, convinced me to go to the hospital.
This seems a good time to mention that The Great State of Ohio is one of those states that allows health insurance companies to refuse to offer you coverage, which they did to us several years ago. We had good coverage through the Authors Guild when we lived in NYC (where insurance companies can charge you out the wazoo but can't refuse coverage entirely), but since we moved out here we have had no insurance.
Meanwhile, back at the hospital, it developed that I had a severely inflamed gall bladder and needed immediate surgery. So they yanked the little sucker out in the nick of time (it was three times normal size and the surgeon said he didn't understand why I was still walking around and not, like, dead), leaving me with four incisions that look like bullet wounds, and sent me home six hours later. Total time in hospital = 22 hours. I wasn't in intensive care, and I didn't even get a real room, just a glorified closet with the bathroom 50 feet down the hall to which I would stagger trailing my IV pole behind me. But I seem to be all right now, although it still hurts when I cough or sneeze.
And then the other shoe dropped. Bills have begun to arrive. So far, they amount to (is everyone sitting down?) a little over $22,000. That's twenty-two thousand dollars. For 22 hours in the hospital. And we haven't received the surgeon's bill yet.
This strikes me as absolutely insane. Twenty-two thousand dollars? That's close to the advance on my last book, which took me most of a year to write. We don't have anywhere near that amount of money. But something tells me the hospital plans to get its money one way or another. As in take away our house.
Go stop by Evan's website and give what you can. You don't really need that sixpack of Old Milwaukee this weekend. In fact, you look like you've put on a few....
posted by tbogg at 9:24 PM
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Read it? Hell, I'm living it.
I'm ashamed to admit that I have somehow avoided reading George Orwell's 1984. I don't know what happened. I guess in the formative years when I should have read it, which for me were prior to the real 1984, I always thought of the book as some kind of dystopian science fiction which has never been my cup of geek. Anyway, I ended up buying the Plume Centennial Edition last year primarily because Thomas Pynchon wrote the new foreword. So what I'm saying is, I bought the 300 page book to read the XXVI-page foreword. Kinda dumb, eh?
Not really. Here are some choice excerpts from Pynchon which make me wish he was working as a political columnist these days:
Doublethink ... lies behind the names of the superministries which run things in [1984]—the Ministry of Peace wages war, the Ministry of Truth tells lies, the Ministry of Love tortures and eventually kills anybody whom it deems a threat. If this seems unreasonably perverse, recall that in the present-day United States, few have any problem with a warmaking apparatus named "the Department of Defense," any more than we have saying "Department of Justice" with a straight face, despite well-documented abuses of human and constitutional rights by its most formidable arm, the FBI. Our nominally free news media are required to present "balanced" coverage, in which every "truth" is immediately neutered by an equal and opposite one. Every day public opinion is the target of rewritten history, official amnesia, and outright lying, all of which is benevolently termed "spin," as if it were no more harmful than a ride on a merry-go-round. We know better than what they tell us, yet hope otherwise. We believe and doubt at the same time—it seems a condition of political thought in a modern superstate to be permanently of at least two minds on most issues. Needless to say, this is of inestimable use to those in power who wish to remain there, preferably forever.
Later:
Memory is relatively easy to deal with, from the totalitarian point of view. There is always some agency like the Ministry of Truth to deny the memories of others, to rewrite the past. It has become commonplace circa 2003 for government employees to be paid more than the most of the rest of us to debase history, trivialize truth, and annihilate the past on a daily basis. Those who don't learn from history used to have to relive it, but only until those in power could find a way to convince everybody, including themselves, that history never happened, or happened in a way best serving their own purposes- or best of all that it doesn't really matter anyway, except as some dumbed-down TV documentary cobbled together for an hour's entertainment.
Good stuff. I may even read the book now.
posted by tbogg at 8:57 PM
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Okay. He says he'll do it for a box of Krisy Kremes and a Happy Meal. Oh. And he says he'll sleep in his car.......
After stumbling through a career that has resulted in many a remaindered book, David Horowitz finally found a niche for himself: whining that conservatives are excluded from our college campuses in much the same way that Ann Coulter is passed over for inclusion on any mental health task force. But what really abrades Horowitz's chubby white thighs is the lack of money bringing Conservative speakers to college campuses (without mentioning himself, of course):
Selection of speakers, allocation of funds for speaker activities and other student activities will observe the principles of academic freedom and promote intellectual balance. A CSPC review of major university commencement speakers revealed that 99 percent were self-identified Democrats or liberals.
So what happens when a group college Republicans save up some money from their Affirmative Action Bakesales and after getting the deposit back on their Zima keg? They just go and piss it away:
The Democrats' campaign for the presidency is fueled by an insane rage, a conservative columnist told more than 100 people on Wednesday night at a Valparaiso University speech.
Jonah Goldberg, a contributing editor to National Review, blasted the Democrats for trying to choose a president based on a perceived ability to beat President Bush.
[...]
Goldberg's speech was sponsored by the VU College Republicans the VU Federalist Society
I guess that $5 was burning a hole in their pocket.
posted by tbogg at 2:05 PM
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I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me...Love Is All Around, No Need To Waste It edition.
Sometimes the world just gets you so down in the dumps that only a massive dose of Hillbilly Heroin can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile:
“I'll be honest with you, it's a little depressing to see all of this fringe, wacko and just absolutely off-the-ball stupid stuff being supported or apparently supported by so many people. It really makes you wonder what kind of country we have.”
“I've been trying to do a much better job recently of getting in touch with my feelings, and it's hard, because my whole life I've shoved them away.”
Touchy-feely Rush.
Ew.
posted by tbogg at 1:06 PM
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Clipping the paper at the Halliburton Executive Dining Room
I wonder who gets the job of using the platinum shears at Halliburton to remove the offending article?
Oh. That's right. They only read the Wall Street Journal. No comics there.
posted by tbogg at 11:59 AM
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All Jesus, all the time
The hysteria (minus the writhing on the ground and the speaking in tongues) for Mel Gibson's Jesus Christ: Aramaic Graffiti continues to build:
Responding to increased demand from exhibitors, Icon and Newmarket said Wednesday that they now planned to distribute more than 4,000 prints of "Passion," up from the approximate 2,500 previously announced.
The increase reflects the expanding number of theaters that will play "Passion" and the number of theaters that will show the pic on multiple screens. Icon and Newmarket now say they plan to be in 2,800 theaters, up from an original 2,000.
[...]
Several theaters around the country are planning midnight showings on Tuesday night, including the ArcLight in Hollywood.
A Cinemark theater in Plano, Texas, plans to show "Passion" on all of its 20 screens. After a midnight show, it plans to keep the pic playing 24 hours a day.
Previously it was announced that Gibson's movie would only be shown in select communities:
If you live on the west side of Manhattan, on most of western Long Island, or in Beverly Hills and you want to see Mel Gibson's controversial new movie "The Passion of the Christ," you will be out of luck.
When the film -- which some critics are calling anti-Semitic and inflammatory -- opens on Feb. 25, it will be in very select theatres only.
Even though the makers of "The Passion of the Christ" are touting its 2,000 screen premiere, the movie's Web site and another Web site, moviefone.com, tell a very different story.
For example, in the borough of Manhattan in New York City, the film will play in a handful of out-of-the-way-theatres -- one in Times Square, two in fringe areas of the East Side, one second-run theatre at Broadway and 100th St. and one in Harlem. There will be one screen below 34th St, and none from 42nd St. to 96th St. on the West Side. This excludes all prestige venues like the Ziegfeld, the Paris, the Beekman and Sony Lincoln Square.
[...]
The same goes for the wealthier and trendier parts of Los Angeles such as Beverly Hills and Century City. Those who are curious will have to seek their "Passion" in odd places, in out-of-the-way cineplexes. You won't be able to see it at the Beverly Center, for example. But four theatres in economically less desirable San Jose, Calif. will show the film.
All of this seems designed to keep "The Passion of the Christ" out of neighborhoods that are considered Jewish, upscale or liberal.
Unmentioned is that fact that movie will also not be screened at any theaters offering Jujubes at the snack bar because, well, you know....
posted by tbogg at 10:53 AM
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He bounded into the room like a big golden retriever. A big stupid stupid dog knocking over tables and lamps.
Peggy's been kind of hard on President Not Reagan so she's in the mood for a little make-up sex. Let the leg-humping begin:
The president bounded into the Roosevelt Room at 10:30 on a weekday morning with a flurry of aides behind him. He looked tanned, rested and perhaps preoccupied. He walked around the table and shook hands with everyone. Then he did something surprising. He sat down at the big brown meeting table and instead of offering an opening comment and then taking questions, as I'd expected, he simply talked to us about how he sees the world. He did this for 45 minutes. He was funny and frank. He made a point to make and maintain eye contact with each of us, now this one and now that, as he talked. He shared thoughts, observations and stories in a way that seemed both free-associative and thematically linked. The theme was freedom, or rather liberation--liberation in political terms, in personal terms, in the world and at home. I cannot quote him, but since the dozen who were there will soon be sharing their impressions with friends, and since you are my friends . . .
What the president's associates and allies had been telling me seemed completely true. His spirits were high, and at points he seemed loaded for bear. He has rock confidence that his actions in Afghanistan and Iraq have been right and have helped the world. He suggested that you've got to stand your ground when it's the high ground. He made it clear he intends to.
He wound it all up, took no questions, and left with the flurry.
Of course, as Peggy herself said last week:
George W. Bush is not good at talking points. You can see when he's pressed on a question. Mr. Russert asks, why don't you remove George Tenet? And Mr. Bush blinks, and I think I know what is happening in his mind.
Making this the perfect Bush Meetup for Peggy who has made a career out reading people's minds and finding that most of them not only agree with her her, but they like her, they really like her:
We left inspirited. Most everyone there if not everyone was a supporter of the president, but I think each came out more so.
How did he treat me? I'd like to say he was cool because that would suggest he's been reading my columns and they've had a huge impact. In fact he was friendly as ever. There are several ways to interpret this. I choose to believe he is hiding his pain.
Peggy then recycles some of her greatest hits from her online interview the other day:
Mr. Bush is the triumph of the seemingly average American man. He's normal. He thinks in a sort of common-sense way. He speaks the language of business and sports and politics. You know him. He's not exotic. But if there's a fire on the block, he'll run out and help. He'll help direct the rig to the right house and count the kids coming out and say, "Where's Sally?" He's responsible. He's not an intellectual. Intellectuals start all the trouble in the world. And then when the fire comes they say, "I warned Joe about that furnace." And, "Does Joe have children?" And "I saw a fire once. It spreads like syrup. No, it spreads like explosive syrup. No, it's formidable and yet fleeting." When the fire comes they talk. Bush ain't that guy. Republicans love the guy who ain't that guy. Americans love the guy who ain't that guy.
You see, normal guy Bush isn't an intellectual (stop the presses!) and it's the intellectuals who start all the problems of the world with their fussy Manichean outlook. Good/evil, black/white, peace/invade Iraq to grab the oil and reward our campaign contributors with no-bid contracts, tomato/to-maw-to. Stuff like that. And so, when the fire comes, we need a man of action. A man, who when confronted with a fire, directs traffic and counts kids and lets others put their lives on the line because he's all busy with that pointing and counting stuff and can't be bothered putting his life on the line because, well, what if there's another fire? Who's gonna direct traffic? Bush is that kinda guy, and by God, America just loves a curbside flagwaver because someone needs to wave the flag when the caskets roll by.
Which is why Peggy thinks he should be President again. Or something like that. I won't pretend to read her mind.
(Added): I would be remiss in not pointing out one part of Peggy's column that made my day:
Barbara Bush wasn't exactly fancy. They lived like everyone else. She spoke to me once with great nostalgia of her early days in Texas, when she and her husband and young George slept in the same bed in an apartment in Midland. A prostitute lived in the complex. Barbara Bush just thought she was popular.
All of you psychology majors out there may have at it...
posted by tbogg at 10:12 AM
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The extraction of her Opinion Gland seems to have been a success.
Debating issues is for thee, but not for me, says the audioanimatronic First Lady:
Mrs. Bush wouldn't disclose her opinion on the issue of gay marriage, a hot-button topic on both coasts.
In California, gay couples have been lining up to get marriage licenses in San Francisco. On the East Coast, the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court recently ruled that its state constitution permits gay marriages — a ruling the president called "deeply troubling."
Bush has said that if judges "insist on forcing their arbitrary will upon the people," he would be forced to protect the "sanctity of marriage" by seeking a constitutional amendment to prohibit same-sex marriages.
So far, he hasn't.
"It's an issue that people want to talk about and not want the Massachusetts Supreme Court or the mayor of San Francisco to make their choice for them," Mrs. Bush said. "I know that's what the president thinks. I think people ought to have that opportunity to debate it, to think about it, to see what the American people really want to do about the issue."
But when asked how she feels about same-sex marriages, Mrs. Bush replied: "Let's just leave it at that."
Let's talk about nice things because nice things are nice.
posted by tbogg at 9:26 AM
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It's not a "screed", it's a....deconstruction. Yeah, That's what it is....
Talking blogging with a brief mention of America's Worst Mother™.
Disclosure: Last night watching Jeopardy, I missed a question where the answer was: "What is a blog or weblog".
D'oh.
posted by tbogg at 9:16 AM
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Crouching Candidate, Hidden Headquarters
This is truly the sign of a candidate with a mandate from the public (subscription required):
Nader Near A Decision As Some Beg Him Not To Run
The young man answering the phone at the Nader 2004 Presidential Exploratory Committee headquarters was polite and apologetic. No, he could not reveal the location of the committee's headquarters.
"It's for security reasons," he said. "We have too many adversaries."
If you happen to find the headquarters, knock three times on the door. The password is: hubris.
(Thanks to Anna...again)
posted by tbogg at 9:11 AM
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Circling and spinning down the drain. Soon to be just a gurgle.
Buried beneath more hoopla over Mel Gibson (and isn't this possibly one of the greatest PR campaigns ever?) is this little tidbit about putative funnyman Dennis Miller:
Dennis Miller's CNBC show has been on the schedule for only three weeks, and already they've brought in someone to fix it. Steve Friedman is heading to Los Angeles today to work as a consultant on the show for the next two months.
Friedman flew out west last week to meet with Miller and senior producer Eddie Feldmann before accepting the gig. "I think they've got a good start and I think I can help them as they evolve into a signature program for CNBC," the longtime "Today" executive producer told The TV Column yesterday.
"Dennis Miller is a comedy genius and a talk show host; the question is, how to do both elements in one show," Friedman said.
Miller opened with a bang, averaging nearly 750,000 viewers with California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger as a guest. But the show has never repeated that performance, dipping under 200,000 on occasion.
Friedman said there's no chance he will stick around longer than the two months because he has to get back to executive-produce the fourth telecast of his PBS newsmag "Flashpoints." That show is hosted by Bryant Gumbel, for whom Friedman also exec-produced CBS's morning newsmag when Gumbel headlined it, and Gwen Ifill.
I don't think that Friedman should have to worry about sticking around for two months. At its current rate of audience decline, the Miller show isn't even buying green bananas for the Green Room.
posted by tbogg at 9:03 AM
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Kicked to the curb
Following up on the below post about Katie Hnida, I see that Colorado football coach Gary Barnett was suspended today for his incredibly stupid comments about Hnida.
There's a pretty good discussion going on over at Atrios about this too.
And thanks for all of your emails about my daughter and football.
posted by tbogg at 8:56 AM
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Wednesday, February 18, 2004
More than a little disturbing
I cringed when I read this story about Katie Hnida.
The president of the University of Colorado said Wednesday that she has requested Boulder police to investigate a rape allegation by a former female football player.
Katie Hnida, a 1999 placekicker for the team and the only woman ever to play football for the school, told the magazine Sports Illustrated she was verbally abused, harassed and molested by other players and -- on one occasion -- raped by a teammate. She said she never reported the rape to police.
As those of you who have been reading this blog since last fall know, my daughter was the kicker on her freshman football team this year and has been invited back with a good shot at varsity next season (the varsity kicker is a senior and the JV had a rotating cast of kickers). We went into the season last year with a great deal of concern regarding her physical safety (she's 5' 2" and about 112 pounds) as well as how her teammates and their parents would accept her. After she got popped a few times on blocked kicks we got over worrying about injuries about as much as humanly possible when it comes to having your child playing football. As far as her teammates were concerned, it was a non-issue. Her best friends at the school are some of her buddies from the football team who show up at her soccer games and hold up signs and chant her name. The only incident during the season was earlier on when one of the boys, talking to one of the coaches, referred to her as the "kicker chick". He spent some time running laps. But when I see things like the Hnida attack, it plants a little seed of concern that I wish I didn't have to have. Another concern is new sudden national concern-of-the-week about whether girls should be allowed to play boys sports, and I'd hate to see that affect her. I'm just hoping the national doesn't become the local.
Oh. Casey finishes her soccer season this afternoon with a team that has gone 18-2-3 and outscored their opponents over the last five games 38-1. She has 7 goals and nine assists on the season.
She's a stud no matter which version of football she plays.
posted by tbogg at 1:54 PM
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Beating Scotty like a rented mule
Helen Thomas is the greatest:
MR. McCLELLAN: I'll come to you in a minute.
Go ahead, Helen.
Q I want to revisit a question I asked you last week and you didn't have the answer -- you may have it now. Did the President ever do community service while he was in the National Guard?
MR. McCLELLAN: Helen, you had said that this was relating to a rumor that you heard, and I think there's a difference between rumor-mongering and journalism. And so I'm just not going to dignify those kind of rumors from this podium. I think the records have been released and you have -- all the information is available to you publicly.
Q So you don't really know?
MR. McCLELLAN: No, I said this was relating to some trashy rumors that are circulating out there, and I'm just not going to dignify them from this podium.
Q It's a very simple question.
MR. McCLELLAN: Go ahead, John.
Apparently there is no simple answer. All Scott has to do is say, "No. The President did not do any community service while he was serving his country in the Texas Air National Guard. He was focused on keeping America safe and fulfilling his obligation."
See? And he even gets to say "focused" again which gets him a kibble when he goes off stage.
Meanwhile, the press smells a new kind of blood:
Q But it would appear, though, that people very high up in this administration didn't have a whole lot of faith in the forecast of the report that went up to Congress just a week ago in terms of the job creation numbers.
MR. McCLELLAN: Again, it's an annual economic report that is put out by the administration based on the economic modeling and the data that's available at that point in time.
Q Can you answer the specific question, though? Was this report -- was the prediction of this many jobs, 2.6 million jobs, vetted prior to publication by the entire economic team?
MR. McCLELLAN: It's an annual report, David. It goes through the usual -- it goes through the usual --
Q That's not the question. Was it or was it not vetted by the entire economic team?
MR. McCLELLAN: It's an annual report. It goes through the usual --
Q So you don't know, or it was, or it wasn't?
MR. McCLELLAN: Can I get -- can I finish that sentence?
Q When you answer the question. Let's hear it. What's the answer?
MR. McCLELLAN: The answer was, it is an annual economic report and it goes through the normal vetting process. And if you would let me get to that, I would answer your question.
Q -- the full economic team vetted the prediction --
MR. McCLELLAN: It's an annual economic report. It's the President's Economic Report. But again, the President --
Q Just say yes or no --
MR. McCLELLAN: -- it goes through the normal -- it goes through the normal vetting process.
Q So the answer is, yes. I'm not done yet, I've got another one.
MR. McCLELLAN: Okay.
Q Why -- if you're suggesting that people will debate the numbers, that's kind of a backhanded way to say, oh, who cares about the numbers. Well, apparently, the President's top economic advisors do, because that's why they wrote a very large report and sent it to Congress. So why was the prediction made in the first place, if the President and you and his Treasury Secretary were going to just back away from it?
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, one, I disagree with the premise of the way you stated that. This is the annual Economic Report of the President and the economic modeling is done this way every year. It's been done this way for 20-some years.
Q So why not -- why aren't you standing behind it?
MR. McCLELLAN: I think what the President stands behind is the policies that he is implementing, the policies that he is advocating. That's what's important.
Q That's not in dispute. The number is the question.
MR. McCLELLAN: I know, but the President's concern is on the number of jobs being created --
Q My question is, why was the prediction made --
MR. McCLELLAN: -- and the President's focus is on making sure that people who are hurting because they cannot find work have a job. That's where the President's focus is.
Q Then why predict a number? Why was the number predicted? Why was the number predicted? You can't get away with not -- just answer the question. Why was that number predicted?
MR. McCLELLAN: I've been asked this, and I've asked -- I've been asked, and I've answered.
Q No, you have not answered. And everybody watching knows you haven't answered.
MR. McCLELLAN: I disagree.
Go ahead.
The beating never really stops turning this into 32 Minutes of Scotty Smackdown which is a mere thirteen minutes short of the Jesus Line.
This guy should be getting A-Rod money....
posted by tbogg at 1:14 PM
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The comics
Doonesbury
Ben Sargeant
Jeff Danziger
Chris Britt
posted by tbogg at 12:49 PM
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President intrigued by hot gay sex
Developing...
posted by tbogg at 10:14 AM
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Shooting blanks at the Bushco corral
Businessman, entrepreneur, and World Class Hooker Magnet Neil Bush is getting married again in March to the mother of his lovechild, but don't expect the newlywed Bushs to be spawning any more heirs to the throne:
PRESIDENTIAL brother Neil Bush won't be making any more babies with his bride-to-be Maria Andrews. PAGE SIX has learned that he recently underwent a vasectomy. We can also reveal that the newly pruned Bush will marry Andrews March 6 in Houston, with a reception to follow at the home of Neil's parents, George and Barbara Bush. It's unclear if President George W. Bush, who is scheduled to be in Houston on business that weekend, will attend. Neil may have wished he had his vasectomy a lot sooner if the DNA test ordered by a Houston judge names him the father of Andrews' 3-year-old son. In January, a judge mediating Neil's nasty divorce with Sharon Bush ordered the test to determine if he fathered Andrews' son while still married to Sharon. Andrews' ex-husband, Robert, countered with a defamation lawsuit against Sharon Bush in September, saying he is the boy's father. Neil and Sharon have three children: fashion model Lauren, 19; Pierce, 17; and Ashley, 14.
No word yet which side of the aisle the herpes will be seated on.
You know, this wouldn't be happening if they were homosexuals....
(Thanks to Anna)
posted by tbogg at 10:02 AM
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Dance, funnyman, dance....
Thanks to all of you who voted for Tbogg over at Wampum's Koufax Awards. And thank you Dwight and Mary Beth for hosting it and doing all the hard work of tabulating the votes and keeping it straight. Also congratulations to all the winners and nominees in the other categories. I look forward to seeing each and every one of you at the official Awards ceremony and Line Dancing Afterparty.
I am positively tumescent with pride at having won, particularly considering the excellent competition this blog faced. Now I confront a year of having to face down every little funny-boy (or girl) blogger with a modem and a quip, itching to prove that he (or she) is just a little bit faster, a little bit snarkier. On the upside, during sex my wife is now screaming, "Ravish me, you 2003 winner of the Sandy Koufax Award for Most Humorous Blog! Make me a woman!" which is kind of cool, the neighbors complaints notwithstanding.
posted by tbogg at 9:32 AM
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Breakfast of AWOL Presidents
Fifty years ago....George W. Bush...sitting at a table...reading the back of the cereal box.
It's all starting to make sense...
(Thanks to Steve)
posted by tbogg at 9:08 AM
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Don't we all wish...
Coming soon to a neighborhood near you.
(Thanks to Tim)
posted by tbogg at 9:01 AM
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We thought we would put it right next to the Ass-Grabbing Concourse....
Gov. Shriverbanger longs for the days of smoke-filled backrooms:
California law strictly bans smoking in offices, bars and restaurants, but Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger a longtime cigar smoker has proposed converting the state Capitol's interior courtyard into a "smoking plaza."
Under the actor-turned-governor's plan, part of the Capitol's roof would be removed to create an area where legislators and other Sacramento visitors could smoke.
The governor's spokeswoman, Terri Carbaugh, explained that Mr. Schwarzenegger wants to create an informal meeting and schmoozing area where he can smoke cigars with lawmakers and other power brokers.
"It's a more positive environment where they can all be on an equal footing, as opposed to everyone going into the governor's office where he's behind his desk," the spokeswoman said.
I'm sure there's money in the budget for dismantling part of the roof so he can light up.
Priorities and all that...
posted by tbogg at 8:42 AM
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Tuesday, February 17, 2004
I just knew we would find a 666 on her scalp
Lacking energy today, I popped over to Lileks' blog hoping for mainline hit of pure, unadulterated, teeth-exploding, sugar rush and, of course, I found it:
Gnat wrote her first word today. She has decided that she's going to be a writer; she got a notebook, a pen, and announced that she had to do homework. "I'm going to write a pome," she said. "No, a direy. I need to write a story in my direy." And this diary entry was an account of her day: going to the zoo with Livvy, seeing flamingos, riding the monorail, and being naughty when it was time to leave the sandbox.
First off, why does Lileks assume that Gnat would misspell 'diary' and 'poem'? Granted the words would lose their "awwwww, isn't she the most precious thing" factor, but doesn't he think that someday, possibly when she is in her "Goth period", Gnat will look back and wonder why her dad made her sound like Charly in Flowers For Algernon? Let's face it, Lileks misspelled the words, not Gnat, probably in an effort to keep her down because he wasn't going to let any three-and-a-half year old upstage him with all her fancy Goodnight Moon book learnin' and notebook writin'-in.
Then there is this disturbing admission:
Then she wrote her name.
Highlight of my day. I should note that she wrote her name successfully on the previous page, but stalled halfway through this time, deciding to make the L a "box," in which she drew "an ant, a heart, and a trumpet." I fear I have a surrealist on my hands.
Take the Gnat Rorschach Test and tell me if you see "an ant, a heart, and a trumpet".
Maybe it's the evil times that we live in or possibly the evil mood that tends to possess me whenever I read Lileks, but that "L" that became a box sure looks like the devil (see the horns?) peering at us from a flaming portal to hell.
Gnat is the Anti-Christ.
Or "Saten", as her dad might put it...
posted by tbogg at 2:15 PM
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Noonan's nightmare
Looks like some folks got through to la Noonan:
St. Louis, Mo.: Will enchanted dolphins arrive in time to save President Bush's drowning Presidency like they saved Elian?
Peggy Noonan: Maybe. And maybe he won't need saving. And maybe the Democrats will. And maybe by the election you'll need saving, and perhaps some of Bush's decisions made in connection to the war on terror will save you. It's all the maybes that keep us getting up in the morning with a sense of excitement and anticipation, don't you think?
She takes her lumps over Bush too:
Gambrills, Md.: Your characterization of Bush as a firefighter was as follows: "But if there's a fire on the block he'll run out and help. He'll direct the rig to the right house and count the kids coming out and say, "Where's Sally?" He's responsible. He's not an intellectual."
So, during Vietnam, where was Bush? John Kerry was in Vietnam earning several Purple Hearts, a Silver Star and a Bronze star for, among other things, being in charge of a swift boat, taking out enemy soldiers when his shipmates were under fire, and saving one of his shipmates who had fallen overboard.
Bush was campaigning for a family friend in Alabama, after he used family favors to get into the National Guard in order to avoid service. That's responsible?
Peggy Noonan: Let me put it another way: Where is Kerry now? Where is he on Iraq, on mideast policy, on the war on terror? Do you really believe he's fighting the fire? In honor Kerry's service in Vietnam -- who doesn't? But I'd like to see him take more responsibility now. As for Bush, I knew a lot of people who didn't join the Guard back then and didn't learn how to fight. I think you're too quick to put down his service.
_______________________
Kansas City, Mo.: Excuse me? "Bush is the triumph of the seemingly average American man." He used connections to bypass 500 others to get in the Guard, his father's friends helped him in the oil and baseball business, and he's in the White House thanks to people his dad appointed. So how is that average? Sounds a lot more like the triumph of the well-connected American man.
Peggy Noonan: Put your resentment away for a second and consider this. There's a funny thing about Bush. He started life with all the advantages -- parents, security, standing. And yet I have noticed there is about him the lack of smoothness, and the chippiness, of one who is self made. He's not like some smooth countryclub entitlement baby, he's rougher and less...lemonade on the porch in Greenwhich-y. I think it's Texas. What do you think?
That is some weak stuff from Peggy.
Good job everyone!
posted by tbogg at 1:33 PM
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Things we wish we had read first and things we're glad we never said or thought
Sadly, No! catches Dennis Prager being stupider than usual:
By showing more of their bodies, women can announce that they are women. There are other ways young women can publicly demonstrate their distinct female identity -- for example, by wearing feminine clothing and other feminine behavior, being a wife, being pregnant and being a mother.
This may be the 'barefoot and pregnant' quote of the year.
posted by tbogg at 1:11 PM
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You can't hide it in a war...unless you're in Alabama. Then it's kinda easy....
MWO exposes the kind of man that John Kerry is.
posted by tbogg at 12:52 PM
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Reading makes me sleepy...
I see that poor Tim Graham still can't get through an entire 326-word article without getting "plum tuckered-out", as they say at NASCAR races and Rickets Festivals. Here's Tim on Toby " I Don't Wanna Talk About My Mullet" Keith:
ANNOYING WASHPOST [Tim Graham]
The Washington Post also displayed its liberalism overtly today in yet another harangue against country performer Toby Keith. Reviewer Joe Heim wrote:
It was much better than most contemporary country, but the evening was tainted by Keith's egregious displays of reactionary folderol. As talented, funny and entertaining as Keith is, there can't be any excusing his venomous jingoism in "Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American)" and the "Taliban Song," both of which he sang Sunday. Whatever the original intent of these tunes, to continue to make them the focal point of his live performance seems craven and cynical.
Which is where Graham leaves off. Here we pick up where Heim kept going and Graham got left behind in the dust:
It was much better than most contemporary country, but the evening was tainted by Keith's egregious displays of reactionary folderol. As talented, funny and entertaining as Keith is, there can't be any excusing his venomous jingoism in "Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American)" and the "Taliban Song," both of which he sang Sunday. Whatever the original intent of these tunes, to continue to make them the focal point of his live performance seems craven and cynical. This is particularly so on "Courtesy," where he tarts up lines like "We'll put a boot in your ass, it's the American way" with bursts of red confetti and pyrotechnic blasts.
In an interview with Dan Rather on "60 Minutes II" in October, Keith expressed doubts about whether going to war in Iraq was the right thing to do. But there's no similar equivocating onstage. He might defend his songs as pro-troops and pro-America, but more than anything they are vengeful, passionately pro-war and meant to inflame.
Maybe Graham will get to the rest of that after his nap....
posted by tbogg at 12:46 PM
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Fighting another war from a nice safe distance
Now that he's no longer fighting Islamofascism with his trusty 50-caliber QWERTY Recoilless-Keyboard, Andrew Sullivan has taken up arms to battle the dreaded Christofascists:
WHY NOT ARREST THEM?: I concur with John Derbyshire that one possible response to the civil disobedience in San Francisco is the mass or singular arrest of married couples or the mayor. Some on the Christian right agree and want to arrest Newsom. Go ahead. Make his day. I'm sure many of those newly married couples would also gladly go through the arrest procedure. Being thrown in jail for loving and committing to another person for life would highlight much of the injustice that now exists. The arrests would further the groundswell of empowerment that is now dawning on gay America. So bring it on. We shall overcome.
If it's war they want, it's war that they shall have. Gentlemen! Prepare the milky load cannons!
posted by tbogg at 12:06 PM
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The everchanging face of Jesus
Alicublog has a fun piece on that guy that everyone is trying to claim these days:
In later years I met a few certified Jesus Freaks and found them very pleasant company, if you stayed off the topic of religion (which, believe it or not, they could, though they ended each encounter by praying that one day I would "come to Jesus"). For years I thought followers of the Man from Galilee were perfectly OK.
Well, we all know what happened after that. American Christianity became a witch-huntin'. homo-hatin', muscle-flexin' affair. The nuns of St. Pat's, apparently, hadn't been hardcore enough; they'd been unable to make that final leap of faith, and present to us a different Jesus that did not love, that did not forgive. What was needed in this new, crucial age was not a Jesus who would lead us down to the riverside for veggie casseroles and wet t-shirt baptisms, but a Jesus that would lead us into battle, and that namby-pamby "Prince of Peace" character just wasn't going to make it.
His earlier mention of Jesus Christ Superstar reminded me of a date in high school with then-tbogg-girlfriend Cindy. Walking out of the Cinema Grossmont after seeing the film she suddenly burst into tears and wailed, "It's all true!" alerting me to the fact that she wasn't too stable...and I wasn't getting any that night.
We should have gone to see American Graffiti instead. I blame it all on Jesus.
Funny how you remember stuff like that...
posted by tbogg at 11:17 AM
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Ruining a perfectly good evening of fondue and Pictionary...
It used to be that Mel Gibson could clear the house of guests by breaking out the Yahtzee dice. Now he just show's them his movie Jesus Christ--Beat Me, Hurt Me, Make Me Recite the Psalms:
MEL GIBSON's doing TV, preparing folks for the ceaseless, endless, pitiless, violence in his "The Passion of the Christ." He's previously had parlor parties, selected friends, who've shown it in home movie theaters. Rich friends. Poor one's with studio apartments don't have screening rooms. A routine is wine/champagne, hors d'oeuvres, buffet supper, desert, coffee, bucket of popcorn and 90 minutes of unrelenting beating, whipping, nailing, torturing and agony. The host's major problem being, what kind of wine goes with blood.
Per some who've sat through this: "Gibson clearly says the Jews killed Christ. In his movie, Pontius Pilate's a nice guy who wants to let Jesus go. The Jews say, 'No . . . give Him more.' Pilate's wife gives Jesus water. Pilate again says to release Him. Again the Jews won't."
One evening, all 50 guests, eerily silent at the end, left quietly. Two, whose professional relationships made them unable to walk out in the middle, said: "It's tough to take. Nobody should see this ugly horrible movie."
Then again, it beats the video of his trip to the Grand Canyon...
posted by tbogg at 10:55 AM
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Dumb and dumberer
When, exactly, did America start huffing Kryolan?:
God's creation of the Earth, Noah and the flood, Moses at the Red Sea: These pivotal stories from the Old Testament still resonate deeply with most Americans, who take the accounts literally rather than as a symbolic lesson.
An ABC News poll released Sunday found that 61 percent of Americans believe the account of creation in the Bible's book of Genesis is "literally true" rather than a story meant as a "lesson."
Sixty percent believe in the story of Noah's ark and a global flood, while 64 percent agree that Moses parted the Red Sea to save fleeing Jews from their Egyptian captors.
The poll, with a margin of error of 3 percentage points, was conducted Feb. 6 to 10 among 1,011 adults.
I'm beginning to think that The Handmaids Tale is coming true.
posted by tbogg at 10:22 AM
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Blurring the line between legitimate media...and Drudge.
It must be so confusing:
This is unusually transparent partisanship, even by the not-very-demanding standards of Big Media in an election year. The good news is that it is transparent.
But hey, maybe Lindlaw will do a story on Kerry: "There were women in the room where Kerry spoke, something bound to serve as a reminder of a story that consumed the Kerry campaign last week. . . ."
The difference being that there are serious questions about Bush's service in the National Guard that have still not been answered, whereas the Kerry story was a bunch of Drudge crap. But Glenn (who has gotten more thin-skinned as the election grows closer) smells Big Media conspiracy. I mean, look!, Lindlaw appeared in a forum with Helen Thomas and Daniel Schorr back in January.
Plotting a little sedition in the Green Room, I'm sure...
posted by tbogg at 9:52 AM
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Tuesday dolphin blogging
Here's your chance to make Peggy cry:
Such skirmishing is breaking out startlingly early, says political commentator Peggy Noonan in her Sunday Outlook piece, The Democrats Have Had Their Fun, Now It's Time to Rumble, before the Democratic nominee is even finally settled. But it shows that the White House is in fighting trim, ready for a campaign that may prove to be one of the most dramatic in recent memory.
Noonan will be online Tuesday, Feb. 17 at 1 p.m. ET, to answer questions about her Sunday Outlook article and Election 2004.
Submit your questions and comments before or during the discussion.
Hurry...hurry.
posted by tbogg at 9:14 AM
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When you said "footsteps", did you mean "skidmarks"?....
D'oh:
MS. CONNIE HORNER: We're all wondering -- we're all wondering how you enjoyed the race yesterday?
THE PRESIDENT: A lot. (Laughter.) I had the honor of calling Dale Earnhardt, Jr., after the race, to congratulate him. I said, there's nothing wrong with a fellow following in his father's footsteps. (Laughter and applause.) We had a great time, really a good time.
Dale Earnhardt Sr.:
Dale Earnhardt, one of the greatest stars in auto racing history, died Sunday from injuries in a last-lap crash at the Daytona 500.
The seven-time Winston Cup champion, known as The Intimidator for his aggressive driving, had to be cut out of his car after slamming into the wall on the final turn of the race while fighting for position.
Well, I'm sure that's not what he meant and I just want to say that I hope George W. Bush follows in the footsteps of his father too. You know, the one termer.....
(Thanks to Joe for the link)
posted by tbogg at 9:07 AM
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Pink slipped....
Someone's act is getting tired:
The problem is her worst lines, which make me - and many others - absolutely cringe. Because of her repetitive, tasteless "jokes" about minority groups, we have dropped her column from The Press-Enterprise.
We brought Coulter aboard last month as one of 13 fresh voices; the basic idea was to add vitality and diversity to our pages. Coulter joined the mix because several of our editors liked her vigor and candor even if we didn't necessarily agree with her views. Her sample columns did not contain offensive material, and we expected her writing to meet a more professional standard. We took a chance on a firebrand writer, and it didn't work. We're not afraid to admit our mistake, and fix it.
posted by tbogg at 8:46 AM
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Monday, February 16, 2004
The soft bigotry of legacy expectations
I'm sure this has something to do with national security, homeland defense, and the war on 'terra':
The documents also included numerous copies of Mr. Bush's Yale transcripts, showing that he took anthropology and city planning his junior year and political science and Japanese his senior year. The Guard blacked out Mr. Bush's grades, but the president's average scores are widely known. "I can assure you that he lived up to his C-plus reputation," Mr. Bartlett said.
posted by tbogg at 12:26 AM
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But every one else did it....
Drudge doesn't have shit on Kerry:
FLASHBACK: MEDIA GRILLED BUSH OVER 'ADULTERY' CLAIMS
As main press players blast the DRUDGE REPORT and foreign outlets for revealing details of a behind-the-scenes campaign drama surrounding candidate Kerry and the nature of his relationship with a mystery woman -- just 12 years ago the same players peppered former President George Bush with questions surrounding an infidelity rumor!
In 1992 top reporters swiftly reacted to a footnote in a book quoting a long dead ambassador.
CNN rushed to get the rumor into the media stream as White House correspondent Mary Tillotson confronted President Bush as he hosted Israel Prime Minister Rabin in the Oval Office.
Guess who's wearing the blue dress this time?
posted by tbogg at 12:12 AM
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Sunday, February 15, 2004
Jesus wept...and then put his fingers in his ears and went, "lalalalalala"
Just in case you needed another reason to skip Mel Gibson's Crouching Jesus, Hidden Agenda:
People have been saying for years that Scott Stapp likes to write songs for Jesus, and they're right. The Creed singer has put together four songs for Mel Gibson's controversial new movie "The Passion of the Christ."
Walking the red carpet at music mogul Clive Davis' Grammy party on Saturday, Stapp said he's in talks with his label for permission to hand at least one of the tracks over to the actor/director. "Hopefully that goes through. He wants to do it real bad, and I do too," Stapp said.
I guess this is just in case the closing credits love-theme from Slipknot doesn't focus group well.
posted by tbogg at 10:57 AM
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It's melicious-riffic
Kevin at CalPundit gets all the cool letters.
posted by tbogg at 10:24 AM
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Saturday, February 14, 2004
Quack
If an incompetent doctor is called a "quack", what do you call an unethical judge?
How about a Scalia?
To the strains of protesters blowing on duck calls outside the Prado Ballroom in Balboa Park last night, U.S. Supreme Court Associate Justice Antonin Scalia made the case for his judicial philosophy to lawyers and law students inside.
If the roughly three dozen protesters bothered the justice, he didn't show it. His 25-minute address contained what have become the hallmarks of Scalia rhetoric in his 18 years on the high court: agile intellect, cutting wit and confidence that his position is correct and the opposition hopelessly addled.
Scalia was speaking at the invitation of the Thomas Jefferson School of Law, as part of its annual Jefferson Lecture. He is also scheduled to judge a moot court competition at the University of San Diego School of Law on Monday.
The protesters blew duck calls as a sarcastic reminder of a controversy surrounding Scalia's recent duck hunt with Vice President Dick Cheney.
The two went on the trip last month, three weeks after the Supreme Court agreed to hear a White House appeal in a case involving private meetings of Cheney's energy task force.
Duck, duck, duck, duck....the issue.
posted by tbogg at 11:40 AM
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Friday, February 13, 2004
Does this mean that I can't watch my TIVO'd Super Bowl highlights? Because I really miss...football. Yeah, football. That's what I miss...
If it's only one day....well, okay, I guess. But why didn't they call it Republican Celibacy Day?
posted by tbogg at 2:48 PM
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Things to do in America when you hate Ann Coulter
She smeared and lied about Max Cleland.
Okay. Here's your weekend assignment:
Let's mess with Ann Coulter's livelihood.
Read the rules. Remember, you're not talking to the le skank, just the people who give her paychecks.
For added bonus points, if you're in a Bordersbarnesandnoble supermegabigbox bookstore, you might want to move copies of Coulter's books throughout the store so it becomes a fun and exciting game for her fans who could probably use the exercise anyway.
posted by tbogg at 1:42 PM
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Keeping me safe from being forced to get a divorce and marry a man...
I see the fear of a queer planet has caused a group of Californians to gather together and become:
The Justice League of America.
...but that didn't work out because the name was already taken and, besides, nobody had any superpowers except for that guy who can turn his eyelids inside out, so they settled for:
Campaign for California Families
...which doesn't sound near as cool and the odds of a McDonalds Happy Meal tie-in with an action figure is problematic. Anyway, unbeknownst to my family and other families that I am acquainted with, the CCF is going to bat for us (as well as throwing the ball in a strong overhanded manner--like a boy, not some girly-throw, by God) and keeping homosexuals who threaten our way of living, from doing the one thing that we heterosexuals do better than them: start wars marriage.
Opponents of gay marriage went to court Friday to stop an extraordinary act of ongoing civil disobedience in which San Francisco has issued nearly 100 marriage licenses to gay couples.
Weddings were continuing Friday and over the long holiday weekend, despite the effort by the Campaign for California Families to obtain a restraining order that would prevent the city from issuing more licenses or performing more ceremonies inside City Hall.
But under normal legal procedures and because of Monday's President?s Day holiday, it appeared unlikely that anyone would succeed in blocking the gay marriages before Tuesday.
"Frankly, it was a brilliant strategy. They got it done. The unfortunate fact is that these people who think they are married may find out Tuesday they are not," Richard Ackerman, an attorney for the conservative group, said Friday.
Meaning that they will be living in (even more) sin over the long holiday weekend in San Francisco, and, frankly, isn't that what you'd really prefer to be doing this weekend instead of going to see 50 First Dates after dinner at Red Lobster?
Here is the leader (or as they call him : Grand Monogamous Owner of the Pure and Heterosexual Penis) of the CCF, Randy Thomasson:
RANDY THOMASSON is founder and executive director of Campaign for California Families (CCF), a nonprofit, nonpartisan family issues organization standing up for moms and dads, grandparents, children, and concerned citizens statewide. Considered one of California's top pro-family leaders, Randy is on the front lines fighting to restore family-friendly values to the nation's most influential state.
[...]
A steadfast defender of family-friendly values, Randy has debated anti-family spokespersons on TV and radio, and has joined popular local and national talk-show hosts on their programs, such as Roger Hedgecock, Alan Colmes, Michael Reagan, John and Ken, Warren Duffy, Al Rantel, Ken and Company and Barbara Simpson. Randy has also been a guest on Dr. James Dobson's national "Focus on the Family" radio program.
Currently, Randy is working to mobilize California's pro-family majority to regain moral territory that has been stolen from families, and to protect the rights that citizens still have.
If it's all the same with Randy (ironic name alert) I'm willing to sign over my portion of the moral territory, that was stolen from my family, to a nice gay couple. Hopefully that territory is the one currently occupied by my neighbors with the six kids all under the age of nine. I hate them.
Stupid breeders.
posted by tbogg at 12:22 PM
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No sex for you
As we have said before, some people choose abstinence, others have it thrust upon them. But George Bush, knowing that it's too late for his daughters, Jenna and not-Jenna, has plans for the Virginal Youth of America™:
The Bush administration is proposing to double spending on sexual abstinence programs that bar any discussion of birth control or condoms to prevent pregnancy or AIDS despite a lack of evidence that such programs work.
A study by researchers at the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention on declining birth and pregnancy rates among teenagers concludes that prevention programs should emphasize abstinence and contraception.
"Both are important," said Dr. John Santelli, the lead author of the study, which has not been published.
Funds will be used to purchase these T's for the so-far unsullied flowers of virtue and the "My god. Won't this erection ever go away? Why must you torment me!" crowd.
No fun will be had by all....
posted by tbogg at 11:25 AM
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Maybe the audience can't hear the jokes over that flushing noise
Roger Ailes points out that Dennis Miller's audience is beginning to find it's level.
"Miller's disconcertingly flaccid attempts to meld jokes on the news, serious political commentary, conservative hero worship and the chimp were greeted by a huge-by-CNBC-standards initial audience of 746,000 viewers, but they seem to be plummeting.
Week one averaged 540,000 viewers for the first airings of new shows; week two pulled in less than half, just 261,000."
Contrary to reports, the Dennis Miller Show does not swirl counter-clockwise in the southern hemisphere due to the Coriolis force. It goes straight down the drain just like here in the United States.
posted by tbogg at 10:49 AM
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Well, that one time that I had sex, I got all confused and happy and flushed and tingly and disoriented. It was the best three minutes of my life.
James Lileks, who we know had sex at least once, is worried about a President that can't focus on the job because he might be thinking about bumping uglies with someone other than his wife and then Western Civilization will come crumbling down around our ears and Gnat will never get to sing Tomorrow in the annual Miss Cutest Minneapolis Dimples Little Sweetie Pie Pageant and that would make Jesus cry:
Does that matter in a Senator? A Congressman? A governor? Probably not. Oh, but if he lied to his wife he’ll lie to us! Trust me: many a faithful politician has lied to his constituency without first bedding a chippie to see how this lying stuff worked for him. But it matters in a President, for one reason: I just don’t want a guy who’s thinks a lot about whether his dowsing rod will find a new stream, okay? Yes, yes, as Glenn put it, I have to say that, to me, how Kerry would do on the war is a lot more important than what (er, or who) he's doing in the sack."
True enough. But what I want is focus. Serial philanderers lack focus. (If that’s what he is, and I have no idea.) I want a guy who keeps his jacket on when he’s in the Oval Office, to say nothing of his trousers. I don’t want a guy who gets The Itch now and then, and finds the portion of the day devoted to scratching that itch getting bigger, and bigger, and bigger, until once again we get an intern scandal right about the time we’re supposed to be concentrating on Iranian nuclear tests.
Because if there is one guy who knows about scratching that itch and getting more sex than Brent Baker with a four hour erection, it's James Lileks.
posted by tbogg at 10:26 AM
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He's also a finalist for the Neil Bush Silverado Loving Cup
Welcome our Russian Republican brother:
At the end of 2003, former Russian banker Alex Konanykhin was spending a little time in jail as a guest of Uncle Sam, having been nabbed by U.S. immigration officials as he tried to go from Buffalo to apply for political asylum in Canada. (That's right, going across the Peace Bridge in his BMW, leaving the country. )
Konanykhin, one of the first Russian millionaires after the fall of the commies, left in 1992 and was granted asylum here in 1999. He's built a very successful Web advertising business in New York City.
But in November, an immigration appeals panel, apparently deciding that Vladimir Putin's justice system was just hunky-dory, reversed the asylum ruling. Department of Homeland Security folks moved with stunning alacrity to send him back to Russia, where he's accused of stealing from his bank. He says not so.
Then a federal judge in New York blocked the deportation, and the immigration appeals panel reversed its earlier ruling and sent the matter back to the first immigration judge.
So imagine Konanykhin's surprise when he got a breathless fax from the National Republican Congressional Committee saying he had been chosen "New York Businessman of the Year."
"As such, you will be honored and presented with your award," NRCC chairman Thomas M. Reynolds (R-N.Y.) said, at a "special ceremony" April 1. " President Bush and Governor [ Arnold] Schwarzenegger are our special invited guests for the NRCC Spring Gala," the Reynolds invite said.
"We will use that letter as evidence Konanykhin qualifies for permanent resident status as a businessman of extraordinary ability," his lawyer, Michael Maggio, said yesterday. "Many thanks to the Republican leadership. I'm so grateful, a donation does seem appropriate."
Yeah. And make that donation check out to the GW Bush Dental Record Depository and Paper Shredder Hall of Fame.
(Thanks to Anna...one more time)
posted by tbogg at 10:01 AM
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Attempting to slip a five under her thong-strap, I was tackled by the Secret Service
The other Bush daughter, not-Jenna, has apparently taken a job at one of those "Live Nude Co-eds" places to pick up a little drinking money:
FRISKY First Daughter Barbara Bush put on a belly-dancing show at Chelsea hot spot Viscaya early yesterday while imitating the undulating tummy of a sword-twirling Japanese dancer named Yoko. Bush jumped up and joined Yoko at the socialite-studded after-party for Jennifer Nicholson's fashion show, prompting partygoers to throw flowers and hundreds of dollars in cash at the feet of Bush and Yoko. Commenting on the trays of margaritas and Veuve Clicquot champagne delivered to Bush's table before her gutsy performance, one wag quipped, "I hope the Secret Service is driving her home."
Thank Jeebus that they put "FRISKY First Daughter" in front of Barbara Bush. Otherwise, the mind reels...then it drops to it's knees and pukes up everything it 's eaten since March 2002.
(Thanks to Anna...again)
posted by tbogg at 9:51 AM
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"Mummy? Who was Medea?"
Happy Friday the 13th and lets get started on America's Worst Mother™.
This week we are horrified to see Meghan, driven mad by a distant husband, a decaying house, and the slings and arrows of a thousand papercuts pondering going all Andrea Yates on the children: Shania, Mirrabella, Opie, and Smegma. As we have seen in previous columns, over the past five or six weeks, the Gurdon's house has a jammed door that can hardly be opened, overflowing toilets, and a broken doorbell. This week we discover:
"Who was the dog? No, don't drink the bathwater, Phoebs."
"It's yummy," she says, raising a teacup to her lips.
"We like it," seconds the mermaid.
"I know, but remember? The water in our house may be yucky, we have to get it tested ? "
As if there's not enough decay and breakdown around here, what with the sudden death this week of both the dishwasher and the phone, and the fact that when I unplugged the vacuum cleaner this morning, only one prong came out of the wall, leaving behind a protruding metal splinter with the potential to electrocute careless passersby ? as if there's not enough of that, it turns out that the D.C. Water and Sewer Authority has known since 2002 that lead levels are spiking all over the city but only now, thanks to the Washington Post, has let slip this alarming fact to the public. It's not like one can even say, "Well, children, at least it's not Ricin," for of course Violet and Phoebe have never heard of castor beans. Or, for that matter, of the Senate.
Yes. As if it's not enough that the house is a deathtrap, the water in the Gurdon house may now contain unhealthy amounts of lead, which fires a spark in the alcohol-fuzzed mind of Meghan that this would be a good time for the children's bi-monthly bath. But how to lure the feral Gurdon children into this chemical stew of slow death? It is at this point that Meghan comes up with The Secret Magical Pool of Pretty Colored-Water That You Should Lay Face Down In and Breathe Deeply:
Last night our new mania for food coloring in the bath went awry, and the girls were immersed in a kind of foamy gray Love Canal that made me want to avert my eyes. This time I make sure the drips leave the tiny teardrop bottles with firing-squad accuracy: 12 red + 8 blue = "Purple!"
The first Gurdon children are placed in the tub where they play make-believe assuming the roles of a mermaid and then a housewife with crushed dreams and hopes and the empty black void of afternoons spent drinking and watching Green Acres reruns:
Violet puts a toe into the bubbles and withdraws it quickly. "First I'm going to be a mermaid sitting on my rock," she says, and curls elegantly on the edge of the bath like an almost-four-year-old Narcissus.
"Today we played the Farmer Wants a Wife," says the mermaid, trailing her hand in the purple water, "I was the wife, Rory was the farmer, and Harry was a bone."
"I am a wife," Phoebe says, beaming.
"No, you're not."
Meghan, trying to remember the last time she had a 'bone', suddenly snaps out of her reverie, and immediately starts plotting against her smug neighbors with all of their clean well-fed kids, well-maintained houses, and fancy book learning:
That mirthless laughter you hear is mine. That heart bursting with regret is mine. That dining-room table heaped with great boxes of dinner invitations, envelopes, response cards, return-address stamps, and postage stamps is... mine.
There's only one glimmer of fun: Whenever I come to an invitation for a family whose car I happen to know bears a "Regime Change Begins at Home" or "Attack Iraq? No!" bumper sticker, I pointedly affix one of the US Postal Service's handsome Purple Heart stamps. So as I fold, insert, slit my cuticles, wince with pain, and seal the envelope, I amuse myself with one of those absurd strawman scenarios best enjoyed in the quiet of one's own imagination
This scenario is much more satisfying to Meghan than her daily peeking through the blinds at the neighbors houses while muttering obscentities and scratching herself through her faded housedress. They'll pay...oh, yes...they'll pay.
To sum up: Regardless of their long term health prospects, the Gurdon children are saved for another week. Meghan's sociopathic personality disorder (first witnessed in the infamous " capable mother" column) continues to go unmedicated. Mr. Meghan is still AWOL. And Twitchy the Amphetamine Rabbit grows even more depressed knowing that Easter dinner is just around the corner.
Tune in next week when Meghan goes up on the roof with a high-powered rifle and begins "thinning out the neighborhood herd".
posted by tbogg at 9:22 AM
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Thursday, February 12, 2004
Hi.
Miss me?
posted by tbogg at 11:04 PM
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Ann Coulter- Lying Bitch
Yeah. Like that's a revelation.
Lately I've been ignoring le skank because, well lets face it, she's a bit past her sell-by date and it's like picking on Tiffany. I mean, who really cares anymore. But then I saw the man/woman taking a potshot at Max Cleland, and I thought it deserved a response. Coulter writes:
Moreover, if we're going to start delving into exactly who did what back then, maybe Max Cleland should stop allowing Democrats to portray him as a war hero who lost his limbs taking enemy fire on the battlefields of Vietnam.
Cleland lost three limbs in an accident during a routine noncombat mission where he was about to drink beer with friends. He saw a grenade on the ground and picked it up. He could have done that at Fort Dix. In fact, Cleland could have dropped a grenade on his foot as a National Guardsman ? or what Cleland sneeringly calls "weekend warriors." Luckily for Cleland's political career and current pomposity about Bush, he happened to do it while in Vietnam.
[...]
Indeed, if Cleland had dropped a grenade on himself at Fort Dix rather than in Vietnam, he would never have been a U.S. senator in the first place. Maybe he'd be the best pharmacist in Atlanta, but not a U.S. senator. He got into office on the basis of serving in Vietnam and was thrown out for his performance as a senator.
Cleland wore the uniform, he was in Vietnam, and he has shown courage by going on to lead a productive life. But he didn't "give his limbs for his country," or leave them "on the battlefield." There was no bravery involved in dropping a grenade on himself with no enemy troops in sight. That could have happened in the Texas National Guard ? which Cleland denigrates while demanding his own sanctification.
Here's the truth:
U.S. Sen. Max Cleland, D-Ga., was 25 when he became a triple amputee as a result of a grenade explosion during the Vietnam War.
For nearly 32 years, Cleland lived with the belief that it was his grenade that almost took his life. He put his struggle into words in 1980 when he wrote "Strong at the Broken Places," then followed it up with "Going for the Max! 12 Principles for Living Life to the Fullest." Then, in the summer of 1999, Cleland got a telephone call that changed his life: David Lloyd, a fellow Marine who helped save his life on the battlefield, told him it was someone else's grenade that caused the accident.
Cleland has since revisited his memoirs -- adding the rest of the story and a new forward by Sen. John McCain.
Ann Coulter shouldn't even be allowed to speak Max Cleland's name. And she shouldn't be allowed to get away with smearing him in order to prop up a lying fratboy coward who hid out in the National Guard and then couldn't even bother to show up for work. There's no bravery in lying about a man who showed up to do his job and paid the price that Cleland did. And it's too bad that Cleland doesn't have a leg left to kick Coulter's skinny ass back to Connecticut.
I'd pay to see that. I'd pay a lot.
posted by tbogg at 12:15 AM
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Wednesday, February 11, 2004
Compare and contrast
This has been a good week for lefty bloggers and a bad week for George Bush. What makes it a really bad week for Putting the W in AWOL is the National Guard story that has finally gotten legs after three years of being ignored the major media poodles who have only now discovered they have teeth.
To keep on top of this story you should be checking (almost hourly) with Kevin at CalPundit and David at Orcinus who are doing excellent work. Let's also not forget our good friend Atrios who is sort of the Drudge of the left wing but without the egg fetish, habitual lying and overall "closety" vibe.
And if you're in the mood for watching drowning men grabbing at straws due to poor comprehension skills and the inability to keep up with the revelations, you might want to check out Citizen Smash and Bill Hobbs. They're both nice guys but they're way out of their depth.
And anyone citing this letter needs to be dangled over "the shark-filled Gulf of Mexico" until they come to their senses.
posted by tbogg at 10:57 PM
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The penis privilege
If George Bush had had an abortion we could get a look at his medical records.
Judge Casey issued a temporary injunction in November preventing the government from enforcing the Partial-Birth Abortion Ban Act. He said last week that he was prepared to lift that injunction and possibly clear the way for the government to enforce the law if the records were not produced.
Sheila M. Gowan, a Justice Department lawyer, told Judge Casey that the demand for the records was intended in part to find out whether the doctors now suing the government had actually performed procedures prohibited under the new law, and whether the procedures were medically necessary "or if it was just the doctor's preference to perform the procedure."
The department said in its unsuccessful effort to enforce the Northwestern subpoena that the demand for records did not "intrude on any significant privacy interest of the hospital's patients" because the names and other identifiable information would be deleted.
Citing federal case law, the department said in a brief that "there is no federal common law" protecting physician-patient privilege. In light of "modern medical practice" and the growth of third-party insurers, it said, "individuals no longer possess a reasonable expectation that their histories will remain completely confidential."
Oddly enough, Sheila wasn't asked to help out in gaining access to Rush Limbaugh's medical records.
posted by tbogg at 9:58 PM
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I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me: Vietnam War Edition
Rush Limbaugh so wants to join in on the AWOL kerfluffle but knows he should avoid it like a pilonidal cyst, so instead he plays the fringes, and not very well:
"While John McCain was in the Hanoi Hilton, John Kerry was in the Fonda funhouse."
That's it? That's the best he can do?
Jeez. Those Robitussin milkshakes have just taken all the fight out of him.
I imagine he doesn't want to talk about military physicals either.
posted by tbogg at 9:14 PM
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Antonin Scalia successfully changes name to Arrogant Prick Scalia. Few notice any difference.
I'm glad to see that he takes his job so seriously:
Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia (news - web sites), a combative conservative known for his tough talk on and off the bench, isn't backing down in the face of criticism that he should stay out of a case involving his friend and hunting partner, Vice President Dick Cheney (news - web sites).
[snip]
"It did not involve a lawsuit against Dick Cheney as a private individual," Scalia said in response to a question from the audience of about 600 people. "This was a government issue. It's acceptable practice to socialize with executive branch officials when there are not personal claims against them. That's all I'm going to say for now. Quack, quack."
Then again, were we ever supposed to take him seriously after 12/9/2000 when he wrote:
The counting of votes that are of questionable legality does in my view threaten irreparable harm to petitioner (Bush), and to the country, by casting a cloud upon what he claims to be the legitimacy of his election. Count first, and rule upon legality afterwards, is not a recipe for producing election results that have the public acceptance democratic stability requires.
It's his country, he just lets you live in it.
posted by tbogg at 2:38 PM
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Trolling for trash in the gutter. Politics as usual.
Ari Fleischer must be laughing his bald ass off about getting out of this job. Let's watch Scottie grow spin:
Q Again, when this controversy came up 10 years ago, the then Bush-Quayle campaign, on October 15, 1992, put out a press release saying that because of the controversy and the questions, that Governor Clinton should release all documents relating to his draft status, and went on to list letters to the Selective Service system, to the Reserve Officer Training Corps, the Army, the Navy, the Air Force, the Marines, the Coast Guard, the Departments of State and Justice, any foreign embassy or consulate. Was that a fair standard?
MR. McCLELLAN: This is 2004, I would remind you. But let me point out to you that the issue that was before us was whether or not the President had served. There had been some who made an outrageous accusation that the President was AWOL, or that he was a deserter. Just outrageous and baseless accusations. And there was a call for more documents to be released, specifically payroll records. We didn't know that they previously existed still. But we found out that they did, and we provided that documentation. That documentation clearly shows that the President fulfilled his duties.
I think what you're seeing now is that some are not interested in the facts. Some are more interested in trolling for trash for political gain. And that's just unfortunate that we're seeing that this early in an election year. This is nothing but gutter politics. The American people deserve better. We are facing great challenges in this nation, and the President is focused on acting decisively to meet those challenges.
Instead of talking about the choices we face in addressing our highest priorities, some are simply trolling for trash for political gain. The American people deserve better. The American people deserve an honest debate about the choices we face. The American people deserve an honest discussion about the type of leadership their Commander-in-Chief is providing in a time of war, at a time when we are confronting dangerous new threats.
I began this briefing by talking about the importance of confronting the spread of weapons of mass destruction, about the importance of stopping the spread of weapons of mass destruction. This President, from very early on in his administration, has made it a high priority to confront the dangerous new threats we face in this day and age. These are threats that did not come to us overnight. But September 11th taught us that we must confront these threats. Let's have an honest discussion about the type of leadership people are providing to confront those threats. That's what the American people deserve.
This is Scott trying to change the subject because 9/11 changed everything.
The Press doesn't bite:
Q On "Meet the Press," the President was asked, "When allegations were made about John McCain or Wesley Clark on their military records, they opened up their entire files. Would you agree to do that?" And the President replied, "Yeah." Is that still your position?
MR. McCLELLAN: The President -- the specific question was about service, whether or not he had served in the military, if you go back to look at the context of the discussion. And the President said, if we have them, we'll release them, relating to that issue. We have released what additional documents came to our attention.
Qualifier: "related to that issue", meaning: "No. You can't see everything."
Scott gets them to move on...for awhile. And then:
Q No, no. Following up on his question, since we're quoting people. In 1992, John Kerry stood on the Senate floor and said, "I am saddened by the fact that Vietnam has yet again been inserting into the campaign and that it has been inserted in what I feel to be the worst possible way." And he went on to say later on, "We do not need to divide America over who served and how." Are you going -- is this White House and this candidate, President Bush, going to hold him to those remarks and put an end to this now?
MR. McCLELLAN: First of all, this President is focused on our nation's priorities. He is focused on confronting the threats that we face, as I spoke about earlier. And he's going to be talking more about that this afternoon. Obviously, there continues to be a Democratic primary going on, and the Democrats will select their nominee. And I think the American people, right now, want this White House to continue to do what it is doing, which is focusing on their priorities. Like I said, we are some nine months out from election day. There's going to be plenty of time to -- plenty of time --
Q Don't you regard his statements from his --
MR. McCLELLAN: Hold on. There's going to be plenty of time to talk about --
Q -- likely challenger to be the end of this all?
MR. McCLELLAN: There's going to be plenty of time to talk about the choices we face and the statements people have made. The President certainly is someone who does what he says he is going to do and someone who means what he says. And I think that's reflected in the actions he takes.
Q Is he offended by the accusations and insinuations from people who have never served in the military? And especially from leaders of a party who nominated a candidate in 1992 and 1996 that avoided military service altogether?
MR. McCLELLAN: I would just say, again, that it is sad to see some stoop to this level, to say anything or try to do anything for political gain. The American people deserve better.
A few questions about Haiti, a fun back-and-forth about Scott using the word "imminent"...and then:
Q Coming back to John's question real briefly. One of the questions that remain after the release of the documents yesterday involves the President's physical in 1972. Are you guys talking about what happened there and why he didn't take --
MR. McCLELLAN: I think this was all addressed previously. I think that, again, this goes to show that some are not interested in the facts of whether or not he served; they're interested in trolling for trash and using this issue for partisan political gain.
Q What was the answer previous to this?
MR. McCLELLAN: What's the question?
Q On the question of --
MR. McCLELLAN: See, I mean, there are some that want us to engage in gutter politics. I'm not going to engage in gutter politics. I'm going to focus on what we're doing --
Q But you were suggesting you'd answered the question previously.
MR. McCLELLAN: -- to address the priorities for the American people. We went through this in 1994, I believe again in '98, 2000. Now some are trying to bring it up again in 2004.
Q Scott, can I ask, in 2004, just again, why did the President miss his physical?
MR. McCLELLAN: I'm sorry?
Q Why did the President miss his physical?
MR. McCLELLAN: Are you talking about when he -- whether or not he -- I put out a response to that question yesterday, about whether or not he was rated by his commanders as a pilot.
Q Can I just ask you today, in 2004 --
MR. McCLELLAN: No.
Q -- why he missed his physical?
MR. McCLELLAN: Elisabeth, there are some that -- again, this is a question of whether or not he served. That question has been answered through the documents that were released yesterday, and released previously.
Q I just want to hear from the White House Press Secretary --
MR. McCLELLAN: I'm not -- no, there are some -- Elisabeth, we've already addressed this issue. I'm not going to engage in gutter politics. I'm going to focus on what we're doing to make the world safer, to make the world a better place, and to make America more prosperous. If others want to engage in gutter politics, that's their choice. But I think that --
Q How is asking that question engaging in gutter politics?
MR. McCLELLAN: But I think the American people -- I think the American people deserve better.
Q Scott, how does that engage in gutter politics if I ask that question?
MR. McCLELLAN: Well, we've been through these issues. I wasn't accusing you. I'm accusing some -- (Laughter.) But, you see, we went through --
Q -- the answer to that question today?
MR. McCLELLAN: No, we went through these -- no, we went -- we've already addressed this issue. We went through it previously. We went through it four years ago, for sure.
By this time McClellan's head is bulging like that guy in Scanners, and so the press let's him off the hook...for now.
Good fun!
posted by tbogg at 1:53 PM
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It's an honor to fight for your country. So you should do it for free.
The next time someone complains about Democrats playing politics with the War on Terra, ask them what they think about a President who is more intersted in getting elected than in paying military salaries:
The military will have no money to pay for the ongoing wars in Iraq and Afghanistan for three months beginning Oct. 1 because the White House is declining to ask Congress for funding until December or January, well after the presidential election.
Army Chief of Staff Gen. Peter Schoomaker told the Senate Armed Services Committee the $38 billion he has for 2004 war operations will last only until the end of September, as he spends $3.7 billion a month in Iraq and about $900 million a month in Afghanistan. The Army has about 114,000 soldiers in Iraq and roughly 10,000 in Afghanistan.
[snip]
The war has been funded by emergency supplemental appropriations, separate from the Pentagon's annual budget, which is not set up to pay for "contingency operations."
The first Iraq supplemental, requested in March 2003, gave the Pentagon around $63 billion for the war. The second supplemental of $87 billion was requested by President Bush in September 2003. It will run out on Oct. 1. Roughly $19 billion of that total is going toward Iraq civil reconstruction. About $10 billion is for Afghanistan.
President Bush is not asking Congress for a 2005 supplemental until December or January, according to Pentagon comptroller Dov Zakheim.
Sgt. Rummy, on the the hand, claims " I see nothingk!":
U.S. Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld told reporters Tuesday the decision not to request a supplemental rested with the White House. He could not explain why the administration would allow a three-month gap in funding the war on terror, ostensibly its top priority.
"They have so many factors to consider. They have to look at all the departments and agencies. I don't know -- they'll certainly know a lot more," Rumsfeld said.
Isn't it his job to make sure he has a budget and that funds will be available?
posted by tbogg at 12:03 PM
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Seeing as his credibility regarding WMD is at an all-time high...
Head down... plowing forward:
President Bush on Wednesday will make a major policy speech on combating the proliferation of weapons of mass destruction, a senior administration official said.
Bush is scheduled to speak Wednesday afternoon at the National Defense University at Fort McNair in Washington. The speech will be a follow-up to a May 2001 address in which he asked the international community to confront the threats of weapons of mass destruction.
George Bush started a war over 'weapons of mass destruction' that didn't exist. And now he's going to lecture the world on what to do about them. This is like Ben Shapiro buying a box of condoms. It looks good, but nobody is taking it too seriously.
posted by tbogg at 9:51 AM
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I don't fear dying. But I do fear spending eternity with James Lileks
Lileks: If I go to hell I intend to look up Quentin Tarantino and have a few words about how he used that song in “Reservoir Dogs.” Jerk. Who gave him permission to take this song and make us think of someone splashing gasoline on a bloody ear?
The infinite black void of Gnat stories...
posted by tbogg at 9:31 AM
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The awesome power of Michael Powell's man-boobs
Janet Jackson's Super Bowl exposure was "a new low for prime-time television," the government's chief broadcast regulator told lawmakers Wednesday.
The Super Bowl halftime show featured a duet by Jackson and Justin Timberlake that ended with Timberlake tearing off part of Jackson's top and exposing her right breast to 90 million TV viewers. The singers said the incident was an accident and have apologized, but it has fueled calls for the government to pay more attention to what goes out on the nation's airwaves.
The Federal Communications Commission has received more than 200,000 complaints about the halftime show.
Meaning that 89,800,000 people thought it was "pretty cool to see a boob on TV" or just didn't care.
posted by tbogg at 9:16 AM
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The John Ashcroft Uterine Invasion Tour...coming soon to a birth canal near you....
Hey, it's not even Friday and the outrages are already upon us:
A move by U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft to subpoena the medical records of 40 patients who received so-called partial-birth abortions at Northwestern Memorial Hospital in Chicago was halted -- at least temporarily -- when a Chicago federal judge quashed the information request.
Searching for terrorists, I assume....
posted by tbogg at 9:08 AM
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Life during wartime.
I see that those who are defending President AWOL have moved into the third stage of "caught with my flightsuit around my ankles" grief.
First there was denial:
Russert: The Boston Globe and the Associated Press have gone through some of the records and said there’s no evidence that you reported to duty in Alabama during the summer and fall of 1972.
President Bush: Yeah, they’re — they're just wrong. There may be no evidence, but I did report; otherwise, I wouldn't have been honorably discharged. In other words, you don't just say "I did something" without there being verification. Military doesn't work that way. I got an honorable discharge, and I did show up in Alabama.
Then there was anger:
MR. McCLELLAN: Like I said, Greg, you're asking me to kind of break down hour-by-hour what he was doing during 1972 and 1973. What these documents show is that he was serving in the National Guard and he was paid for that service. And they show that he was serving in the National Guard and that he met the requirements necessary to fulfill his duties.
Q But his equivalent duty, does that he mean there was a base there he was flying out of? Is that what he recalls?
MR. McCLELLAN: I'd have to go back and double-check, but he remembers serving during that period and performing his duties, both in Alabama and in Texas.
And these are -- look, these are questions we addressed all during the campaign. The issue that came up recently was some were trying to make an outrageous, baseless accusation. If I recall, some were using the comment, "deserter" or "AWOL." I mean, that is outrageous; it is baseless. The President of the United States fulfilled his duties, he was honorably discharged. And now there are some that are not -- are clearly not interested in the facts. They're clearly more interested in twisting the facts to seek a partisan political advantage in the context of an election year. And that's just really unfortunate that some would stoop to such a level. (You really need to go read the whole press conference with McClellan. He gets worked by the press.)
Now...bargaining:
FROM ALL THE NOISE the pundits have been making, you’d think this was 1976, not 2004.
The Democrats have been attacking George W. Bush’s record of service in the Air National Guard, claiming that he was AWOL in 1972 and 1973. As it turns out, his drilling records for those years have surfaced, and he did miss some drills.
I’m also a reservist, and I missed four drills in 2001 (after 9/11) and twelve more last year. What was my excuse? I wanted to spend more time with my family. No problem, I just made them up later.
So did George W. Bush, according to his service records. And his excuse was much better than mine: he was working on a Senate campaign. This sort of thing happens all the time in the reserves. If you can’t make your unit’s regularly scheduled drill session for whatever reason, you simply drill with another unit, or make the time up later. It’s called "flex-drilling" or "rescheduling drills," and every reservist does it at one time or another.
This should put an end to the controversy – but of course it won’t.
Smash is right about one thing. This isn't going away....
posted by tbogg at 8:55 AM
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Whaddya know?
It was about oil.
We will now await the apologies of the war-bloggers who said that it wasn't about, as they liked to put it :"oooiiiiilllll".
Just as soon as they get over the thrill of typing "rape rooms... rape rooms" over and over and over again...
We'll wait.
posted by tbogg at 8:29 AM
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Tuesday, February 10, 2004
A room with no view
Kathleen Parker really needs to get out more:
President George W. Bush's now-exhaustively vetted interview Sunday with Tim Russert on "Meet the Press" proved the O.J. principle once again: People see and hear what they are predisposed to see and hear.
Most Democrats saw a bumbling, evasive fool who can't account for missing WMD or failed intelligence. Most Republicans saw the usual George Bush who did just fine.
As an Independent, I fall squarely into the "He did fine" camp, with the disclaimer that I wouldn't mind if the forensics fairy visited Bush's chambers on Interview Eve. I want him to do well, to speak clearly and unequivocally, because what he means to say is so important.
Oh really?
Are you sure?
Wanna take that back?
Parker then adds:
When he falters, I find consolation in the fact that Bill Clinton was a mellifluous speaker, and he allowed Osama bin Laden to build a worldwide army against us.
The difference being that when the World Trade Towers were first attacked in 1993, Bill Clinton's Administration caught, tried, and convicted the people behind it within thirteen months.
The Bush Administration has yet to catch their man, who put his plan in motion while George W. Bush took a month-long vacation eight months after taking office. Exactly 29 months later, he's still out there.
This is what happens when you piss away international goodwill and cooperation.
posted by tbogg at 11:27 PM
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I suppose, if you were polite, you could say he misspoke...
But then I'm not polite. He lied:
PRESIDENT BUSH HAD some calming words Sunday for anyone worried about the explosive growth in federal spending. "If you look at the appropriations bills that were passed under my watch, in the last year of President Clinton, discretionary spending was up 15 percent, and ours have steadily declined," Mr. Bush told NBC's Tim Russert. There was only one problem with Mr. Bush's statement: It was wrong. Discretionary spending did not grow nearly as much during Mr. Clinton's tenure as Mr. Bush implied, nor has his spending record been nearly as restrained as his comments suggest.
As the White House acknowledged, Mr. Bush misspoke when he referred to discretionary spending in general. A spokesman explained that Mr. Bush meant to refer only to the portion of discretionary spending, less than half the total, that goes to programs other than defense and homeland security.
What exactly does George Bush have to say to be called a liar by the WaPo? As a man of few words, shouldn't he at least have to be responsible for getting a few of them correct?
posted by tbogg at 10:41 PM
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Could have been a contender
In our house, the Westminster Dog Show is what the Super Bowl is in other houses, except without the boobs and stuff. Thanks to Jim at Rittenhouse, here's the dog that could have won at Westminster. His dad (Bumper Cars) won the last three years within the breed.
Here's who did win.
He weighs exactly as much as I do. That should worry Rick Santorum...
posted by tbogg at 10:29 PM
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It's money that I love...
I'll leave it to the Legal Eagles to explain the reasoning for this ruling:
A federal judge blocked severe restrictions on snowmobiles in Yellowstone and Grand Teton national parks Tuesday, nearly two months after they were put in place.
U.S. District Judge Clarence Brimmer in Wyoming ruled the restrictions would cause irreparable harm to companies that rely on snowmobiling in the parks due to lost business.
Teddy Roosevelt is spinning in his grave. Gale Norton is sporting a boner.
posted by tbogg at 10:23 PM
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George's own personal 9/11
You would think that, with the Presidential race shaping up and heightened attention being paid, the White House would be trying to (mixed metaphor ahead) soothe the waters and pave the way for a return engagement. But with the Kay report last week and a wholly unsuccessful attempt to make the AWOL story go away today, you would also think that they could manage to do one thing that wouldn't call more attention to another potential cover-up. If you thought that, you'd be wrong:
The White House is facing a new battle with the federal panel investigating 9/11. To mollify the panel chair, former governor Thomas Kean, President George W. Bush last week reversed course and agreed to a two-month extension that is supposed to ensure a final 9/11 report by July. But that might not be enough. Commission sources tell NEWSWEEK that panel members are fed up with what one calls "maddening" restrictions by White House lawyers on their access to key documents. Unless the panel gets to see the docs, the report "will not withstand the laugh test," a commission official says. The panel is threatening to force a showdown soon—by voting to subpoena the White House.
[snip]
The four-member team asked to look at 360 PDBs dating back to 1998; White House counsel Alberto Gonzales permitted them to see just 24, arguing that only those that specifically mentioned possible domestic attacks or airplane hijackings were relevant. (One panel member was allowed to read all 360—but couldn't share the contents with colleagues.) The team was permitted to write brief summaries of the PDBs they did read. But White House lawyers objected to some of the wording. The bickering has meant the full panel has yet to be told anything about the PDBs—even while it was conducting interviews with top officials, like last Saturday's with national-security adviser Condoleezza Rice. The restrictions are especially infuriating, one source notes, because at least some of the PDBs appear to have been selectively shared by the White House two years ago with author Bob Woodward for his book "Bush at War."
Add this to last Sundays visit with Tim Russert (known around our house as Boy Meets World) and the execrable State of the Union, and you have to wonder (and hope) how it can get any worse.
posted by tbogg at 9:59 PM
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Devil...details...you know the drill...
The 9/11 Commission has succumbed to the soft bigotry of low expectations:
The federal commission investigating the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks will get greater access to classified intelligence briefings prepared for President Bush under an agreement reached Tuesday with the White House.
The 10-member, bipartisan panel had been barred from reviewing notes taken by three commissioners and the commission’s executive director, Philip Zelikow, who reviewed the data in December. Under the agreement, the entire commission will be allowed to read versions of the summaries that were edited by the White House. (my emphasis)
That should end all the questions about the White House being forthcoming...
posted by tbogg at 3:18 PM
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Okay. In this scene, a rightwing news organization lies to the public and everyone gets screwed...
It was pointed out to me that I may have skipped the news of the day in an earlier post. Here's what I missed:
Fox News producer Marvin Himmelfarb also became fascinated by the 29-year-old Jameson's art form while doing several stories on her.
"He talked Jenna into letting him write a porn script," says our source. "It was rejected, if you can believe that."
Word is that Himmelfarb wrote the script under a pseudonym. A Fox rep said: "We're looking into it ...this is obviously not something a Fox News Channel employee should be involved with."
Neither Strauss nor Himmelfarb returned calls.
I'm not sure which is more amusing; that a Fox news producer is fascinated by Jameson's "art form" (note to self: email this euphemism to Clarence T.) or that we might have seen 8 Simple Rules About Humping My Daughter written and directed by Marvin Himmelfarb....I'm sorry, make that written and directed by Rock O'Toole.
posted by tbogg at 2:11 PM
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Last summer, when I was at Detention Camp...
For just pennies a day, the US Government will abduct a swarthy suspicious teenager of your choice and intern him for 14 months at Camp Stockholm Syndrome South:
An Afghan boy whose 14-month detention by US authorities as a terrorist suspect in Cuba prompted an outcry from human rights campaigners said yesterday that he enjoyed his time in the camp.
Mohammed Ismail Agha, 15, who until last week was held at the US military base in Guantanamo Bay, said that he was treated very well and particularly enjoyed learning to speak English. His words will disappoint critics of the US policy of detaining "illegal combatants" in south-east Cuba indefinitely and without trial.
In a first interview with any of the three juveniles held by the US at Guantanamo Bay base, Mohammed said: "They gave me a good time in Cuba. They were very nice to me, giving me English lessons."
Mohammed, an unemployed Afghan farmer, found the surroundings in Cuba at first baffling. After he settled in, however, he was left to enjoy stimulating school work, good food and prayer.
"At first I was unhappy . . . For two or three days [after I arrived in Cuba] I was confused but later the Americans were so nice to me. They gave me good food with fruit and water for ablutions and prayer," he said yesterday in Naw Zad, a remote market town in southern Afghanistan close to his home village and 300 miles south-west of Kabul, the capital.
[snip]
Mohammed said his detention began in November 2002 when he and a friend, both unemployed, left their farming community for Lashkar Gah, a nearby town. He said that as they stood outside a shop they were detained by a group of armed men who accused them of being members of the Taliban, the fundamentalist Islamic movement formerly in power in Afghanistan.
They were then handed over to US soldiers, who took them to the southern city of Kandahar, he claimed. They were taken to Bagram air base, where Mohammed was held in solitary confinement.
"They were asking me if I was Taliban. I said, 'No, I am innocent'. I thought they were going to release me but instead they put me on a plane," he said. "They asked me to wear a hood for part of the journey. When I got off the plane I was in Cuba."
While Mohammed praised the American soldiers who watched over him, he criticised the US authorities for failing to contact his parents for 10 months to let them know that he was alive. "They stole 14 months of my life, and my family's life. I was entirely innocent: just a poor boy looking for work," he said.
But the counselors were nice:
His words of praise for the American soldiers in Guantanamo Bay echo those of Faiz Mohammed, an elderly Afghan farmer who was detained at the base for eight months before being released in October 2002.
"They treated us well. We had enough food. I didn't mind [being detained] because they took my old clothes and gave me new clothes," said the farmer, who was partially deaf.
Camp Delta, which superseded the temporary Camp X-Ray, and Camp Iguana, a lower-security detention facility for juveniles, were established as part of President George W Bush's "war on terror".
Awwww. Camp Iguana sounds so cute! I hope he took home a wallet and the recipes for smores....
posted by tbogg at 1:43 PM
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I'll leave the keys to the WaPo under the mat
Anyone who wants to access the Washington Post but doesn't want to register and give up your email address can just use:
name: tblogg@hotmail.com
password: noonan
There. Now you can't ever say that I never gave you anything.
Other than laughs and love and that evening in Ushuaia when we went skinny-dipping....
Ahem. Speaking of the WaPo, here's everything that you need to know about Dick Cheney (chubby guy, balding, talks out of the side of his mouth, corrupt...that guy)
posted by tbogg at 12:52 PM
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"It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it."--
Who knew that this week was Make Excuses for The President Week (should someone tell Hallmark)? First we had David Brooks telling us what kind of talk the President would talk if the President could talk talk, then Bill O'Reilly is saddened that the Administration lied to us...but it's probably Tenet's fault and George is simply not to blame.
Now we have Ramesh Ponnuru about some of those funny numbers that Bush seemed to recall during his Sunday meltdown:
On Meet the Press the other day, the president said, "If you look at the appropriations bills that were passed under my watch, in the last year of President Clinton, discretionary spending was up 15 percent, and ours have steadily declined." I was wondering where he got those numbers, so I asked budget maven Tad DeHaven. He directed me to the bottom of Table S-4 on this page. As you will see if you click on it, the table shows the growth of discretionary spending excluding defense and homeland security. For the last Clinton year, that number was indeed 15. Under Bush, it goes to 6, then 5, then 4, then 1. Making an allowance for looseness in the president's speech, the numbers appear to be in line with what he said.
But the numbers are misleading. First, he's talking about budget authority rather than actual spending. Second, he's excluded half the budget (entitlement spending, which he has expanded), then half the remainder (defense), then a chunk of the fraction that's left (homeland security). Third, he is excluding supplemental spending bills, too. So the numbers we are left with don't mean very much. Whether the president is aware of any of this is anyone's guess.
So you see, War Time President Bush is just repeating what some people tell him and he doesn't have time to take off his helmet and put on his green eyeshade, roll up his sleeves, and become Economist President Bush.
Why doesn't he just start prefacing all of his comments with, "Well, my friend told me about this guy who knows this guy whose sister once dated this guy...." or better yet, "I got this email about this $250 cookie recipe....", then we can all sleep better.
Or at least keep from rolling our eyes every time he opens his mouth.
posted by tbogg at 12:29 PM
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I assume that's done with a tongue, but then I'm not a French-Canadian songbird
People say the darndest things:
Celine Dion "went ballistic" after that sound slip-up that kept the audience from hearing a few seconds of her song. "She was reaming everyone in French," says the snitch.
and speaking of tongues up the ass, from Roll Call (subscription required):
"A woman can take care of the family. It takes a man to provide structure. To provide stability. Not that a woman can't provide stability, I am not saying that. ... It does take a father, though" -- House Maj. Leader Tom DeLay
(Thanks to Anna)
posted by tbogg at 11:13 AM
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The return of I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me
We haven't checked in on Big Pharma™ for about a week, so let's see how his rehab is going:
"Bush is the president. He shouldn't be responding to all this chattering going on that's beneath him. John Kerry is just a senator. The president's not going to respond to individual senators, even if he is a candidate for president."
"If you want to talk about Bush on TV and so forth, let's talk about some of the Republicans in the Senate who don't have the chutzpah to stand up to the people in the Senate who are dealing them dirty as well."
"What bothers me is that the guys going after the bad guys are the guys being attacked. The bad guys are getting a pass and Bush is being attacked for an appearance on television! I think it's a dangerous road to travel."
As you can see, Rush is in an amphetamine rage over Manuel Miranda having to take one for the team for hacking Senate computers and then leaking them to the press, when what we should really be ready to pop a rhoid over is those dirty dealing Democrats and what was in those leaked memos. Because the real crime is what is in those memos, and not the person who leaked them to the press.
This is just another example of how drugs can impair your ability to think clearly and consistently:
Prosecutors investigating whether Rush Limbaugh (search) illegally went "doctor shopping" for prescription painkillers can examine his medical records, a judge ruled Tuesday.
[snip]
Limbaugh's attorneys argued that the seizure violated the broadcaster's privacy. Martz said the records were taken to ensure they were not tampered with or destroyed.
Limbaugh recently admitted his addiction to painkillers, blaming severe back pain. He took a five-week leave from his afternoon national radio show to go into rehab.
During his Tuesday show, Limbaugh accused authorities of leaking information to damage his reputation, and said prosecutors have a political agenda.
"The Democrats still cannot defeat me in the arena of political ideas. And so now they're trying to do so in the court of public opinion and the legal system," Limbaugh said. Prosecutor Barry Krischer disputed the allegations.
That consistency hobgoblin must really have him spooked.
Or it's the crank talking...
posted by tbogg at 10:59 AM
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Looks at books
Crooked Timber has an interesting post and comment section on must-read books published since 1970. I was glad to see a lot of my favorites there, including Italo Calvino's If On A Winter's Night A Traveler, DeLillo's White Noise, and even The World According To Garp. I enjoy these lists and feel that they're a great service to people who really love books.
Since my favorite book, The Origin of the Brunists was published in 1967 and doesn't qualify, my two suggestions would be Gloria Emerson's Winners and Losers: Battles, Retreats, Gains, Losses, and Ruins from the Vietnam War in non-fiction, and Ethan Canin's The Palace Thief for fiction.
If more of the war-lovers had read Emerson's book (and good luck finding a copy), maybe we'd be a better country today.
Bonus: Short stories that must be read:
Cynthia Ozick's The Shawl
Tobias Wolff's In The Garden Of The North American Martyrs
and
Alice Elliott Dark's In The Gloaming.
The good news is that Crooked Timber's Harry is going to compile the suggestions.
Go over and make a suggestion...as long as it isn't Cryptonomican (shudder).
posted by tbogg at 9:50 AM
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Hot girl on gir---hey...wait a minute... this isn't hot at all!
Intrepid Internet surfers tired of repeated viewings of Janet Jackson's boobal area may be a bit surprised when they google "bush on bush" and get this:
Like most of us, President Bush doesn't have the facility for perfectly expressing his situation in conversation. But if he did, he might have said something like this to Tim Russert in the interview broadcast Sunday:
At which point, David Brooks takes it upon himself to translate the authentic western gibberish of President Gabby W. Johnson into something that Brooks thinks that the President would say if he were at least monolingual and didn't suffer from adult ADD.
I did like this part:
I said I have found my mission and my moment, and it has cost me. It has cost me some of the bonds I had with average Americans. The secret of my political success was that voters sensed I was basically like them. But this mission, while elevating, is also a cocoon. I see Americans going about their business, watching the Super Bowl and reacting to it all. But I couldn't watch most of the Super Bowl and I didn't have a reaction to the whole halftime fiasco because I had to go to bed and be ready for the continuing war the next day. They say there is a cultural divide between the military and society. There is, and suddenly I am on the other side.
Yeah. I can just imagine Bush saying something like that.
Actually...no I can't.
When it comes to imagination, David Brooks makes Walt Disney look like Carrot-Top.
posted by tbogg at 8:22 AM
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Monday, February 09, 2004
Pulling an all-nighter for the next nine months
Rod Dreher makes me laugh with this comment:
I think Bush has a knockout case for the Iraq war, and his handling of the war on terror. I also know that quite a few people disagree with me. Bush, of all people, should be able to make the case powerfully. If he can't, that telegraphs to people confusion and a lack of confidence in the case, I think. This stuff matters. And because I thoroughly agree with you, John, that the war on terror is the only thing that really matters this fall, I urgently want the president and his team to master this stuff before the Democratic attack machine, aided and abetted by the anti-Bush media, get cranked up. There's far too much at risk here.
In other words, Bush's credibility has tanked and he can't get away with just saying "Because I'm the President and I wanted to". The best comment I read (possibly over at Kos) was that, on MTP, George W looked like a kid giving an oral book report on a book he obviously hadn't read. Now he actually has to do some heavy lifting and back up his actions with facts, at a time when his "facts" are no longer operative. Which means that he can't just give the same "terra terra terra" boilerplate speech that he's been serving up at military bases and $5000 a plate dinners. His only alternative is more sit-downs with friendly journalists and scoring big during the debates. But as Dreher points out earlier in his post:
In the end (Deo gratias) his lack of forensic skill didn't matter in his debate showdowns with Gore, a fact for which we are profoundly grateful. Still, don't forget that Gore lost those debates not because Bush beat him, but because he didn't knock Bush out like everybody expected. That, and becuase Gore's arrogant manner reinforced the suspicion many people had that he is a smarty-pants know-it-all. In other words, Gore beat himself -- and still, he managed to win the popular vote.
Looking more and more like his father, Bush could seal his fate at the debates. (Remember his dad looking at his watch during the debate with Clinton?)
I'm going to go on record as saying that the 2004 Presidential Debates will set viewership records. I think they're going be nasty.
As they say: Pass the popcorn...
posted by tbogg at 1:23 PM
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If the minibar is empty, my column must be done...
Here's Christopher Hitchens at his most absurd:
As with most senior Democrats, Kerry's revolving-door record with lobbyists and donors is one to make Cheney and Bush look like amateurs
Usually, when someone's blood alcohol level reaches the point where they can write a sentence like that with a straight face, their heart and lungs have both stopped working and they're secreting pure Wild Turkey through their pores.
Meanwhile, Hitch paid a visit to his good pal Andy Sullivan on the West Coast.
posted by tbogg at 12:23 PM
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Here I am with my immigration form
It's big enough to keep me warm when a cold wind's coming
This is a fascinating article on President Bush's Immigration proposal and the high cost to the states if he gets his way:
LANHAM, Md. – For Sergio and Rebecca, life in this working-class suburb is crammed with 80-hour workweeks at Wendy's and McDonald's, squeezed into the dingy two-bedroom apartment they share with 10 other illegal immigrants, and weighted with melancholy about their children far away in Mexico.
In early January, however, a new immigration proposal from the White House lifted spirits at their run-down apartment complex just outside the Capital Beltway, where during the past two years immigrants from Mexico have crowded into nearly half the 320 units. Most of the immigrants who live there are in the United States illegally. Many – like Sergio, 33, and Rebecca, 25 – have children back in Mexico whom they desperately want to bring to the United States.
President Bush's plan would grant temporary legal status to Sergio and Rebecca because they already have U.S. jobs.
Most important to the couple, however, is a provision that would allow them to bring their children to live with them.
[snip]
The hopes of this immigrant family illustrate a rarely mentioned feature of the Bush proposal, which is expected to get its first congressional hearing before a Senate committee this month. Many of the millions of immigrants who would get temporary work visas under the plan would bring their children, causing added strains on schools, community health agencies and housing.
Jeffrey Passel, a demographer at the Urban Institute in Washington, D.C., predicts that a large-scale legalization program would trigger a major influx of children – probably hundreds of thousands – to join their parents.
Although nobody knows for certain how many illegal immigrants have children in their native countries, Passel estimates there are already 1.6 million undocumented immigrant children in the United States and 3 million U.S.-born children of undocumented parents.
Indiana University professor Jorge Chapa, who has studied immigrant communities in California and Texas, warns that the immigrant parents themselves will face daunting, child-rearing challenges.
"When you have parents working around the clock to make ends meet, that means the kids will be left to raise themselves, to a large degree," Chapa said. "If you look at conditions that cause kids to become gang members, they have a marginalized existence, marginalized from their families and from their schools."
[snip]
The schools in Prince George's County, where Sergio and Rebecca's children would be enrolled, already provide summer programs for students learning English as a second language, or ESL. Seventy percent of the children are Hispanic; 60 percent qualify for free or reduced-cost lunches because of their parents' low incomes.
"We get some federal grants, but the needs far outweigh the money the feds allocate," said Supreet Anand, who runs the county's ESL program.
County spokeswoman Lynn McCawley ticked off the expenses: ESL teachers, parental liaison, translation at PTA meetings, newsletters printed in Spanish and English.
"It gets costly," said McCawley, who doesn't expect the federal government to step up to meet the costs of federal immigration policy.
"I'm sure they'll fund it as well as they do the No Child Left Behind law," she added with a touch of sarcasm. "That's an unfunded mandate."
Doesn't she understand that he needs those Hispanic votes this November?
Go read the whole thing.
posted by tbogg at 10:03 AM
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George can't get no...bum bum bum...sat-is-faction...bum bum bum
How many times have we heard this?:
"I will not be satisfied until every American who wants a job can find one."
Well, here comes this years job projections:
The economy should shed its jobless label this year with the creation of about 2.6 million new positions, the White House forecast Monday.
[snip]
In the annual Economic Report of the President, the White House said the number of workers on U.S. non-farm payrolls was likely to rise to an average to 132.7 million this year from a 2003 average it thought would come in at 130.1 million.
Sounds like good news, eh? But before you go out and buy that 42" plasma screen in anticipation of that first heavy-duty paycheck:
Last year, the Bush administration was looking for the creation of about 1.7 million jobs. But the economy actually lost 53,000 jobs, bringing the total number of jobs lost since Bush took office to 2.2 million.
Whoa! From plus 1.7 million to minus 53,000. That's a swing of about....hmmmm...carry the four.....plus seven....well, let's just say that if you predicted that the Detroit Lions and the Oakland Raiders were going to be in the Super Bowl two weeks ago, you would have been much closer to your prediction than the Bush Administration was on job growth.
Just another year of no satisfaction in the Bush household.
Only this time, it's not Laura....
posted by tbogg at 9:49 AM
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Faster, quicker, more to the point George.
Wonkette eliminates most of the stuttering and distills President Getting Smaller By The Minute's talk with Tim.
Going clam digging, George?
posted by tbogg at 9:14 AM
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Sunday, February 08, 2004
So can we go back to calling him "stupid"? Not that we ever stopped....
As the reviews come tumbling in, even Andy Sullivan is starting to admit that things aren't looking to rosy:
I've only seen clips and will try and see the whole thing later. Of course, most people will only see the clips as well, so maybe the whole impression won't matter. But the impression I get from readers who saw the whole thing is that Bush seemed completely out of his depth. Even on Fox News, the juxtaposition of Bush's folksy chatter and Kerry's booming voice must have the White House worried.
posted by tbogg at 11:31 PM
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Interesting and interestinger
Looks like Kevin Drum found the blue dress that George W Bush wore to the AWOL Ball.
posted by tbogg at 11:20 PM
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Dude. That is soooooo last week
You gotta hand it to Herb London. It took him a whole week to get around to saying what every kneejerk pecksniff had already said by Tuesday.
The level of general cultural degradation is now employed as a rationale for the perverse half time Super Bowl show. Andy Rooney, CBS culture commentator, who I find neither funny nor insightful, said, "For what there is on television and in the entertainment industry these days, one bare breast doesn’t seem like much to cause a fuss over." Well, that is precisely the point. So immersed in smut are some American people, that they are incapable of recognizing perversity even when in front of their eyes.
This man thinks that a boob baring is "perversity".
What a boob.
posted by tbogg at 9:50 PM
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Looks like I screwed up
It was probably a mistake to get rid of my archives. Blogger still shows that they're there but I can't get them back on the blog. If anybody else has been through this let me know how you retrieved yours.
Oh. And another thing, I see that Blogger is not allowing any upgrades to existing blogs, so things like pictures and RSS feeds are off the table for now. I have had some offers from others to host Tbogg as well as set me up with Movable Type, which I'm considering...as long as it's not too much work and not too big of a pain in the ass.
Looks like basset blogging will have to wait.
America looks at its watch and waits, tapping its foot......
posted by tbogg at 9:30 PM
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"I'm empty and aching and I don't know why"*
I was just reading about Peter Jackson winning the Directors Guild of America award for LOTR: The Return of the King. Now there are about twenty directors in Hollywood who could have directed the three movies as well, if not better, than Peter Jackson, particularly when you consider how much of the film was CGI. While I enjoyed all three movies in varying degrees, and I can appreciate the time that Jackson put into the project (to say nothing of the pressure of living up to the expectations of the Tolkein Cult) I never came away from any of the installments thinking I had seen something well put together. In fact, walking out of The Return of the King, I thought Jackson should have been smacked upside the head for the interminable scene of Gollum (the Jar Jar Binks of LOTR) being swallowed up by the lava at Mount Whateverthehellitwas. So I guess I can't agree with the Guild on this one which isn't too surprising since they tend to go for epics over the personal almost every year (although you have to give them credit for passing on Mel Gibson for the crapulent Braveheart).
Having said all that, I can't think of too many directors who could have made a film as perfect as Lost In Translation. Like her earlier The Virgin Suicides, Sofia Coppola demonstrates the gift of tone and pace. She can say more in a minute of silence than most directors can with twenty minutes of dialogue. Great performances. Static shots that could be art posters. A soundtrack that adds to the story instead of marketing itself (including new songs from Kevin Shields of My Bloody Valentine, and The Jesus and Mary Chain's Just Like Honey). And a brilliant piece at the end as Bill Murray leaves for the airport that would have turned maudlin in the hands of so many others.
Watching the movie made me marvel at the fact that we can communicate with each other at all.
Go see it, and then go rent The Virgin Suicides. Sofia Coppola may be every bit as great of a director as her father. Maybe even better....
*America- Paul Simon
posted by tbogg at 7:31 PM
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They're on to you, Peggy
I was going to comment on Peggy Noonan's take on Timmy's talk with President Um ... You Know, but her readers kind of beat me to it. Here's some some choice bits from the feedback section:
Anyone Can Speechify
Jo Ann England - Aiken, S.C.
This Grandma thinks you're wrong. I love philosophy--and the truth. It's not difficult to answer a question when one does so truthfully. When evasion is the objective, then the speaker blunders. Additionally, one has to have an opinion to be able to express one. Those who don't read or talk can't be expected to articulate opinions or give clarity on an issue. Anyone who is charming can give a speech, especially one he didn't write, and especially in this day when he can follow a teleprompter. Yes, Ms. Peggy, you are wrong. But then your base won't think so, will they?
The Thinker
Mary Hoskinson-Dean - Redding, Conn.
Speeches are (generally) written by other people, and then read aloud--perhaps skillfully.
Interviews require a person to respond in his own words, to "think on his feet" (or seat, as it may be).
I'll take the thinker any day.
Reminds Me of a Nightmare
Marcia Smith - Los Angeles, Calif.
It wasn't that Mr. Bush didn't know his talking points that was disconcerting. Rather, it was that he doesn't seem to have grown into the office. He couldn't convey the sense that he had a mastery of his own "vision" of the war on terror, the war in Iraq or the war in Afghanistan. It reminded me of a nightmare I used to have in school: that I was suddenly taking a quiz and didn't know the subject. I just sat in my seat repeating the subject matter over and over as if that would answer the question.
A Genius, Except When He's Not
John Fritton - Oswego, N.Y.
Now that is spin. Mr. Bush is a genius in every forum, except for the ones in which he does poorly. I don't think Mr. Bush is self-conscious. He just feels that running the government is none of our business.
He's Just Dumb!
John Leach - Chicago
Of course Mr. Bush does better in speeches, because he has someone write them for him. Just because he is good at delivery does not mean he is bright. A bright person is able to respond eloquently to questions posed by him that he should know the answers. I think Mr. Bush's speech once again proves that he is dimwitted and does not possess the intellect required for the job of commander-in-chief. Which explains why the nation is in such a mess!
He Has No Policy
John Meyer - Tallahassee, Fla.
You're kidding, right? I would suggest the president's problem articulating policy is a result of the administration not really having any policy. Tax cuts and posturing for the base isn't policy; it may not even be good political strategy. Also, "philosophy" implies a critical evaluation which leads to an outlook. Such a process is anathema to ideologues. If the neocon defense is "we don't like to think things through, it's too hard," then, best of luck.
In Praise of Talking Points
Jack Farrell - Thousand Oaks, Calif.
But the president does not write his speeches. No presidents do, I suspect. So all you have shown is the philosophical consistency of Mr. Bush's speechwriters and his gradual improvement at reading them. Hardly much praise for the president's mind. You make "talking points" sound so shallow, but Mr. Bush gives every indication of not understanding them completely and coherently, a much more telling window into his mind than formal speeches.
posted by tbogg at 6:27 PM
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They have a funny way of showing it
President W talkin' turkey with Tim:
Russert: On Iraq, the vice president said, "we would be greeted as liberators."
President Bush: Yeah.
Russert: It's now nearly a year, and we are in a very difficult situation. Did we miscalculate how we would be treated and received in Iraq?
President Bush: Well, I think we are welcomed in Iraq. I'm not exactly sure, given the tone of your questions, we're not. We are welcomed in Iraq.
Meanwhile, back in Iraq:
In the latest violence, a U.S. convoy was hit by a rocket-propelled grenade in the northern city of Mosul on Sunday, wounding one soldier, witnesses said. A U.S. military official in Mosul, however, said the car was damaged in a road accident and would not comment on injuries.
Also Sunday, a roadside bomb exploded near an Army convoy in Fallujah, west of Baghdad, injuring two soldiers, witnesses said. The U.S. command in Baghdad did not confirm the incident.
For those keeping score at home, since George Bush isn't:
American soldiers are dying at a rate of more than one a day in Iraq, despite some commanders' recent claims to have broken the back of the insurgency.
The toll in January was 45 - five more than in December - despite hopes that deposed President Saddam Hussein's capture would stop the killings from roadside bombs and other attacks.
posted by tbogg at 6:08 PM
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Friday, February 06, 2004
Excuse my mess...
I got bored so I had the painters come over.
It's still a work in progress.
I never did like that yellow....
(Later that night.....)
Okay...this is it for awhile. I've had complaints about people being unable to find links and text readability and the colors and the general lack of high quality, soft-core nipple porn and....jebus, people can sure be whiners. So I've slightly increased the size of the text, changed the colors, got rid of the archives, moved the mailbox, let out the seams, put in a wetbar, and installed a bidet.
I'm also going to upgrade to Blogger Super Duper Hot Shit Version™ soon so I can offer an RSS feed (whatever the hell that is) that people have been asking for. Also I'll be able to post pictures which means Friday Basset Blogging which is a lot like cat blogging only lower to the ground and it poops more.
posted by tbogg at 9:04 PM
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It was forty years ago today...
The Beatles first came to America.
I was seven. I'm ashamed to admit that, for all the thousands of albums, tapes, and CD's that I have owned in the ensuing years, I have only owned 2 of their albums.
So sue me. I just never was a big Beatles fan. Or Elvis, for that matter.
posted by tbogg at 9:27 AM
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Yo-ho yo-ho, a mummy's life for me....
Hey kids! What day is it?
Tbogg reader: (shouted with nipple-hardening enthusiasm) It's Friday!
That's right, which means it's time for the adventures of America's Worst Mother™, Meghan Cox Gurdon.
When we last left Meghan she had endangered the lives of her children, Leona, Hibiscus, Mandalay, and Grunion by locking herself out of the house with the oven on, and then ruining the childrens dinner while she gossiped on the phone about another mother who thinks she's so cool just because her kids are clean, clothed, and well-fed.
This week we find the Gurdon's enjoying a night of family reading from the children's collection of urine-soaked Pirate fiction. Unfortunately son Grunion can't seem to sit still, possibly because his mother ground up all of his ritalin and added it to her morning smoothie, the one she calls "Mummy's Little Helper":
"Like this?" Paris leaps off the sofa and flings himself onto the floor, arms out rigidly, making a face like a dead rat. We all laugh. He jumps up again and cannonballs back into his seat on he sofa. "Oof," I say involuntarily, and resume reading aloud from Chapter XXV of Treasure Island.
" -- Israel Hands propped against the bulwarks, his chin on his chest, his hands lying open before him on the deck, his face as white, under its tan, as a tallow candle -- "
"What's tallow?"
"Beef fat."
"Bleah."
"Go on, Mummy! I love this story!"
"For a while the ship kept bucking and sidling like a vicious horse, the sails filling, now on one tack, now on another, and the boom swinging to and fro until the mast groaned aloud with the strain ? "
"Psssshhhwww!" Paris blasts off again, and reels around the sitting room making a noise like a schooner in bad weather, his arms alternately billowing like sails and whacking back and forth like a boom.
"Like this, right? Gnnnarrrr...." he groans, mast-like.
At this point, Mr. Meghan makes a Hitchcock-like cameo appearance:
"Aw, Paris, let Mummy read," my husband and Molly protest, as one.
"Okay, okay," he complains, still making crafty piratical faces. We continue. For a paragraph. Until someone interrupts.
Meanwhile, as Grunion leaps about the room like a caffinated hummingbird, we discovered that the girls are nestled all snug in their beds and are dreaming about francophile elephants who, unlike their French people counterparts, have no qualms about killing an Arab:
Upstairs the little girls are dreaming of well-dressed elephants after their hour-long reading-aloud session, a Talmudic scrutiny of The Story of Babar. If you have not read it recently, you may have forgotten that the Francophone pachyderm is riding on his mother's back when a hunter shoots her. Babar runs away in terror to a Mediterranean city, where he is drawn up short by the sight of two gentlemen: "Really, they are very well dressed," Babar says to himself, "I would like to have some fine clothes, too! I wonder how I can get them?"
This bizarre Gallic reasoning ? Your mother died today, or was it yesterday? You need new clothes! ? comports perfectly with Violet's world view.
We then learn that the girls are already in bed, prior to seven PM, and that Meghan has grown imaptient with young Grunion and has taken to glancing at her watch, stealing glances at the liquor cabinet, and thanking God that she had her husband fixed, otherwise she'd never get to that pitcher of Harvey Wallbangers:
As Babar heads for the nearest department store, I glance at my watch. There is nothing so worth doing as messing about with books in the nursery, as Kenneth Grahame might put it, but it's almost seven and I've got Treasure Island still to go. I cannot imagine how it would be to have, say, twelve children. How could you possibly introduce them all to the great works of juvenile fiction? If you started reading The Big Red Barn to the toddlers right after dinner, you'd barely be finishing The Adventures of Tom Sawyer at midnight. No wonder so many Americans restrict the size of their families.
We then find out that daughter Hibiscus has an oral fixation involving animals that should alarm Rick Santorum:
"That's me. With my goat," says Phoebe, removing two fingers from her mouth just long enough to point at a little girl in the drawing, then slotting them back in again.
And that son Grunion has started expressing certain violent fantasies:
We're almost at the end, when an interruption comes in and jumps on the bed.
"Sorry girlies," Paris says, "Mummy, look what I've just done!"
He holds up a crude drawing of his own: a stick-figure man hanging from a kind of egg. Underneath the man is what looks like a flower. There's a dark line scrawled diagonally across the whole scene.
"Wow, what is this?"
"It's a 'No Parachuting in a Thunderstorm' sign," Paris says earnestly, "Because, you know, KABOOM-aiieee!"
Upstairs, in their beds, the sleeping girls feel the icy hand of fate stroking their fevered brows.
(Added): In Rashomon style, World O'Crap has a slightly different take.
posted by tbogg at 9:02 AM
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Thursday, February 05, 2004
Anonymous no more
David Neiwert of Orcinus... exposed!
To be fair, here's a picture of me taken this summer.
I feel so much better now...
posted by tbogg at 11:10 PM
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Credit where credit is due
It takes a big man to admit that his "bogus" accusation was... bogus.
HEY, maybe the Plame affair isn't as bogus as Joseph Wilson made it seem. Here's a report that the investigation is focusing on John Hannah and Scooter Libby. Stay tuned.
Posted by Glenn Reynolds at February 05, 2004 07:38 PM
You gotta give him credit...
posted by tbogg at 11:03 PM
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A gathering of geeks
Congratulations to World Net Daily for completeing the rugged Geek Trifecta by acquiring the Virgin Ben to go along with Chubby McPokemon and Every Day Is A Bad Hair Day Mensa Boy.
Hopefully the lads can become good pals and share their Ann Coulter porn....
Speaking of le skank, I see that she's working on her routine for the White Citizens Council Annual Amateur Show and Nightride:
Janet Jackson said she decided to add "the reveal" following the final rehearsal, which I found pretty shocking. Not the reveal -- the fact that the number in question was actually rehearsed. Even CBS executives were enraged by MTV's halftime show, saying they could have gotten the identical show from National Geographic for a fraction of the price.
Care for a little racism with your bile?
posted by tbogg at 10:19 PM
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Now you can play at home
From The Best Page in the Universe comes:
Bill O'Reilly Bingo
(Thanks to Matt for the link)
posted by tbogg at 9:05 PM
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Potted Peggy and the Goth Crested Nipple
To live in the strange world that is Peggy Noonan's you have to be able to connect the dots from Michael Jackson to 9/11 to the boob that roared and... find some meaning in it all.
Of course to make it sound like you're not off your nut, it helps to have one of those nameless friends who is on the same unnatural wavelength and will invariably validate whatever bizarre point you're trying to make in print no matter how farfetched it may sound. Witness:
Later, as we got into a cab, we said nothing. It was odd to go from such sound to such silence. But we were both pondering.
It wasn't that any individual moment during the evening was so stunningly bizarre. (Mr. Brando, for instance, was only as bizarre as Brando is.) It was that taken as a whole the night yielded an unmistakable sense of decay and disorder. "I feel like we just witnessed the end of our culture," I said.
"We are," he said. "It's a freak show now. The whole thing, it's just a freak show."
Two-and-a-half days later came 9/11 and the ending of a world. When my friend and I talked again he said, "Remember that night? You could see it coming then."
Well, yeah, I guess seeing an overweight Marlon Brando at a Michael Jackson concert should have tipped Peggy and her 'friend' (let's call him Chauncey, because you just know that Peggy must have at least three friends named Chauncey) off that there were dark clouds ahead and ill tidings and bad juju and a shitstorm of bibilical retribution as the world-as-we-know-it was about to change. I mean, how could Peggy and Chauncey not share what they had seen and warn the people? I think that was very irresponsible and selfish of them. Don't you?
Anyway, Peggy is "disturbed" (rimshot!) that our culture is turning into a big poopy cesspool of evil "piggy paganism" with nipples adorned with "Goth-looking metal sunburst(s)" that all the world can see and we should just keep it to ourselves like our secret drinking problems and daddy obsessions. Peggy then turns to another one of her imaginary friends, this one we'll call Mickey Kaus:
Blogger Mickey Kaus raised most quickly some big points. "The issue isn't nudity but the implicit endorsement of acting out male fantasies of violent and invasive non-consensual sexual behavior. Never mind the message it sends to international audiences--say young, angry Muslims, to pick a random example, who may have been wondering whether America really is immoral."
Because with all the glitz and glitter and drinking and multi-million dollar corporate excess and flag waving and astronauts sticking an American flag in a giant grey cookie while Josh Groban drones on an on, the one thing that can really set off some "young, angry Muslims" is a boob.
Because it's all about the 9/11 don'cha know....
(Added):Bonus Peggy Noonan lines to collect and trade with your friends:
Blogger Mickey Kaus raised most quickly some big points.
Our media have for decades been robbing our children of the not-knowingness that is the hallmark of childhood.
"Skeletonism," I said to my friend. "I think it's a disease now. You get famous and then turn into a skeleton."
I logged on to Drudge, and saw the big picture of Justin Timberlake, whose expression could have been described as evil if his face had more intelligence, turned toward Janet Jackson, whose famous breast was exposed to show the famous nipple decorated by the famous Goth-looking metal sunburst.
Remember. She used to be an adjunct professor of journalism at New York University, so don't try this at home.
posted by tbogg at 8:58 PM
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"Mr Russert? Adam Levine here. Are you a swallower or a spitter, because I want to get it right."
From Drudge:
President Bush suggested to his staff that he appear on "Meet the Press" on Sunday as a way of answering questions about Iraq after a barrage of Democratic criticism against him, Kurtz will report in Friday editions of WASH POST... White House staffers have particapated in mock "Meet The Press" sessions ahead of the interview, Kurtz claims, with Adam Levine, a former White House aide, playing Russert...
posted by tbogg at 6:09 PM
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Lost in translation
The Gropiantor shows us that Governor Shriverbanger* is having some trouble with the complexities of the English language:
If that weren't confusing enough for voters, the administration Tuesday sought to distance itself from a statement on the official March election pamphlet in which Schwarzenegger cautions that higher taxes are inevitable if the bond measure, Proposition 57, fails.
"The only choice will be to drastically increase taxes,'' reads the statement signed by Schwarzenegger in the pamphlet mailed to California voters.
But Schwarzenegger press secretary Margita Thompson said Tuesday it is not the administration's position that a tax increase is the only option if the bond fails.
"No,'' she said. "The governor's position is that it means more drastic spending cuts.''
You see, the word " only" means he was talking about the exact opposite thing. Try and keep up, citizens.
I must say, he is certainly keeping us on our toes...
(Credit for Shriverbanger goes to the stud-monkeys at whitehouse.org)
posted by tbogg at 3:48 PM
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A weeks worth of I Don't Like The Drugs But The Drugs Like Me in one quote
Please tell me that Rush was kidding:
“Handsome only gets you so far. Handsome hasn't propelled me anywhere, so it's an arguable fact that handsome is going to get Edwards anyplace.”
This is what happens when you sprinkle china white on your Frosted Mini-Wheats....
posted by tbogg at 2:50 PM
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We gave them democracy. Now what do they want?
Steve at No More Mr. Nice Blog points out how well that 'transition' thing is going in Iraq.
posted by tbogg at 2:13 PM
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The one of her dancing topless on the bar at Coyote Ugly is nicely backlit....
Laura Bush just ordered a double:
...producers at CBS News are trying to buy photos of Jenna Bush from supermarket tabloids for a "48 Hours Investigates" story on the presidential daughter .
(Thanks to Anna...)
posted by tbogg at 1:56 PM
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Get the Cheneymaster™ 3000 Defibrillator cranked up. It's looking like a long weekend...
The problems of Dick:
Plame
Federal law enforcement officials said that they have developed hard evidence of possible criminal misconduct by two employees of Vice President Dick Cheney's office related to the unlawful exposure of a CIA officer's identity last year.
The investigation, which is continuing, could lead to indictments, a Justice Department official said.
Shooting ducks with Fat Tony
The revelation cast further doubts about whether Scalia can be an impartial judge in Cheney's upcoming case before the Supreme Court, legal ethics experts said. The hunting trip took place just weeks after the high court agreed to take up Cheney's bid to keep secret the details of his energy policy task force.
According to those who met them at the small airstrip here, the justice and the vice president flew from Washington on Jan. 5 and were accompanied by a second, backup Air Force jet that carried staff and security aides to the vice president.
Two military Black Hawk helicopters were brought in and hovered nearby as Cheney and Scalia were whisked away in a heavily guarded motorcade to a secluded, private hunting camp owned by an oil industry businessman.
Africa
The Justice Department is looking into allegations that a subsidiary of Halliburton Co. was involved in payment of $180 million in bribes to win a contract for a natural gas project in Nigeria, officials said Wednesday.
The $4 billion Nigerian liquefied natural gas plant was built in the 1990s by a consortium that included Kellogg, Brown & Root, now known as KBR, during a time when Vice President Dick Cheney headed Halliburton.
Is it me, or has Dick Cheney started wearing eau de Agnew?
posted by tbogg at 1:29 PM
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Leave the hotel and the mini-bar to work a story? No thanks.
Since most of the scribes on Campaign '04 are busy working the Botox beat, the busy beavers of the blogosphere are doing the heavy lifting when it comes to George Bush's If This Is 1973, I Must Be In Alabama whirlwind AWOL tour.
Here's Bolo Boffin
Cal Pundit
Orcinus
Deal With It.
posted by tbogg at 1:19 PM
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This is what happens when Target is out of two-ply bathroom tissue.
James Lilek (boring midwesterner, Erma Bombeck for the Guns & Ammo set*, owner of a fivehead...that guy) looks like his rhoids are flaring up again and so he's taking it out on Patrick Stewart, John Kerry, and anyone who lived in the sixties who had a better time than James, which means, well, just about everyone.
God no. Please no. I think I speak for millions when I say that I am deathly sick of the counterculture sixties. The music, the war, the protests, all the hagiography - it's not a reflection of the era's importance but the self-importance of the generation who hung on the bus as it trundled along down the same old rutted road of history.. I'm tired of hearing about the boomers' days of whine and neuroses; I'm weary of ritual genuflection to their musical icons; I'm utterly disinterested in most of the pop-cult trivia they hold so dear. We'll probably be better off when that demographic pig has been excreted from the python so we can see the era clearly without choking on the smoke.
Block that metaphor!
I'm waiting for a Kerry speech in which he seems angrier about 9/11 than he does about tax cuts.
I'm waiting for an ad that simply puts the matter plainly: who do you think Al Qaeda wants to win the election? Who do you think will make Syria relax? Who do you think Hezbollah worries about more? Who would Iran want to deal with when it comes to its nuclear program -- Cowboy Bush or "Send in the bribed French inspectors" Kerry? Which candidate would our enemies prefer?
O the shrieking that would result should such an ad run. You can't even ask those questions, even though they're the most relevant questions of the election.
It's all Dennis Miller- ranty but without even the absolute minimum daily requirement of attempted wit or cleverness or originality. Instead it's just an outpouring of undiluted cold-sweat fear that might Minnesota be invaded by swarthy IraqIraninans who don't have a appreciation of 1950's matchbook covers and the timelessness of the Hokey Pokey.
It just occured to me today how much Lileks reminds me of Jerry Lundegaard. The banality, the flop-sweat, the naked fear.
On the plus side we don't have to read about lispy Gnat and how she did the most cutest utterly gosh-darned adorable thing that no kid has ever done or said in the history of mankind, Kathy Lee Gifford's kids excepted.
*credit to Julia at Sysiphus Shrugged
posted by tbogg at 12:26 PM
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Smacked upside his helmet head
Wonkette reminds Tom Osborne (R- Boys Will Be Boys) about a ghost from football past.
posted by tbogg at 11:41 AM
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Sitting ducks
Dwight Meredith pretty much wraps up LuckyDuckGate.
posted by tbogg at 11:30 AM
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Wednesday, February 04, 2004
Although Mr Reznor is flattered, he'll take a pass on this one...
More on Mel Gibson's God Money I'll Do Anything For You:
Three weeks before the release of "The Passion of the Christ," a graphic portrayal of the torture and crucifixion of Jesus, Christians nationwide are busy preparing to use it in an immense grass-roots evangelistic campaign.
[snip]
The movie opens on Ash Wednesday, Feb. 25, and Christian groups are already distributing merchandise to capitalize on the moment. There are lapel pins in Aramaic, the language of much of the film, and "witnessing cards" to give those who ask about the pin; door hangers for the neighbors; one million tracts asking moviegoers to "Take a moment right now and say a prayer like this," and a CD-ROM for teenagers that features a downloadable picture of a nine-inch nail like those that pinned Jesus to the cross.
Get your own downloadable picture right here.
i'll heal your wounds, i'll set you free
i'm jesus christ on ecstasy
posted by tbogg at 11:00 PM
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The Great Media Intelligence Failure of 2004
Lambert at Corrente has Sid Blumenthal calling the White House on their lies.
Bruce Hardcastle was a senior officer for the Middle East for the Defence Intelligence Agency. When Bush insisted that Saddam was actively and urgently engaged in a nuclear weapons programme and had renewed production of chemical weapons, the DIA reported otherwise. According to Patrick Lang, the former head of human intelligence at the CIA, Hardcastle "told [the Bush administration] that the way they were handling evidence was wrong." The response was not simply to remove Hardcastle from his post: "They did away with his job," Lang says. "They wanted only liaison officers ... not a senior intelligence person who argued with them."
A man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest...
posted by tbogg at 10:38 PM
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Well, yeah. Except for those guys....
Moonie Times writer Wes Pruden writes:
Despite George W. Bush's bland assurances that Muslims are just as peaceful as Methodists, Jews and Catholics, most Americans prefer to trust but verify. American churchmen are often fierce partisans for their sectarian beliefs — "my God is awesomer than your God" — but none of them fly airplanes into office buildings as a mark of manly courage, or blow up women and children for the glory of God.
Certainly not this guy.
Or these people.
Or this guy.
And certainly not him.
Fanaticism is so out of character for Americans.
posted by tbogg at 10:29 PM
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Frist Family Robinson
Looks like it's Mission Accomplished over at Amazon where Bill Frist's book A Minimum of Inbreeding has caused some some alert readers to suggest some interesting alternative books. Just scroll down to Our Customers Advice.
Meow.
posted by tbogg at 10:01 PM
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You can't tell the Administration members without a scorecard
Anything that mentions:
The Ann Coulter Transgender Outreach Office
The Center for Talking About Caring About That Literacy Stuff
The Halliburton VIP Hospitality Center & Cuban Cigar Lounge
and The William Bennett Hall of Virtuous Slots
is a must-have.
The White House Inc. Employee Handbook from the well-hung guys over at whitehouse.org is now available. I just got my copy, making me the coolest kid on my block.
Buy it in bulk and piss off Bill O'Reilly.
posted by tbogg at 9:43 PM
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You got some nice constituents there. Be a shame if anything happened to them...
Kos catches the Party of Values threatening the party members to play ball...or else.
posted by tbogg at 9:24 PM
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Don't look dear. Those are breasts and you'll never have them. Not as long as I'm your mother....
Rebecca Hagelin has a "Ravish me, Mandingo" moment:
There we were, my precious 11-year-old daughter and I, curled up on the couch, anxiously awaiting the Super Bowl halftime extravaganza. Let's be clear about this: We weren't watching the game – not a single minute of it. Nope, we were having a girls' fun night running back and forth between decorating her room and trying to catch the much-awaited halftime spectacle. And boy, what a spectacle it was. Janet "Flashing" Jackson and all.
Halftime had already started before we realized it, so we quickly scrambled to catch the rest of the show. Big mistake. I should have known better when I saw the cast of shady characters gyrating across the stage to chaotic music and words I couldn't quite understand. But I'm an optimist, so as we snuggled close and threw the blanket over our legs, I just knew the show would get better. "Besides," I thought, "millions upon millions of families are gathered around their television sets across America to watch the biggest game of the year – we can't all be wrong." At that precise moment, I became a very dumb blonde, as I sat uncomfortably glued to the tube along with the rest of America and my trusting, vulnerable little girl.
Hypnotized and stupid, Hagelin couldn't tear her eyes away from the lithe sweating bodies, the pulsing jungle rythyms
By the time Justin Timberlake ripped off half of Janet's bra to reveal her bare breast like some cheap lap dancer, it was too late.
Cigarette?
posted by tbogg at 2:24 PM
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Wedding in Cherokee P-Town County
Today we will be married
And all the freaks that she knows will be there
And all the people from the village will be there
To congratulate us
I will carry her across the threshold
I will make dim the light
I will attempt to spend my love within her
But though I try with all my might
She will laugh at my mighty sword
She will laugh at my mighty sword
Why must everybody laugh at my mighty sword?*
Just a little reminder that even though Andy Sullivan can get married to "the boyfriend" in P-Town, it will never make him an honest man.
*lyrics courtesy of Randy Newman.
posted by tbogg at 2:05 PM
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Saturday sleepovers, doing each other's hair, and IMing cute boys
Omigaw, we are, like, the hella coolest class evah!:
There apparently aren’t many shrinking violets in the House Republican freshman class.
“It’s the best class that ever went to Congress,” bragged Texas freshman Rep. John Carter. Noting that the class includes former state senators, businessmen, judges, soldiers and doctors, he said, “There’s guys you can turn to in your class for expertise.”
Added Rep. John Kline of Minnesota, “We’ve held together to support leadership in procedural votes with hardly a crack.”
He noted that many freshman members are donating campaign funds to their colleagues facing close races. And, he added, “We’ve spent a lot of time relaxing together. We’re very tight knit.”
This Saturday the 108th Freshmen can be found at the Georgetown Galleria in their Juicy jeans, shopping at Hollister and slouched on the chairs in front of Starbucks talking on their cells.
They are such hotties.....
posted by tbogg at 1:46 PM
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Tuesday, February 03, 2004
Man. Who do I have to slag to get called an "anonyblogger"?
Atrios get all the attention.
For the record, I post anonymously to protect my wife, Meghan and our four children, Amaretto, Eudora, Peignoir, and little Kaiser Soze.
posted by tbogg at 11:51 PM
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And he wonders why women walk away from him in bars....
MRC's resident sex-god Brent Baker tries to make a point...or a funny....or maybe he's still all giggly and flustered about seeing a real live boob without having to peek over a woman's shoulder on the subway:
In the meantime, Moore isn't exactly apologetic. A letter posted last week on his Web site begins: "I would like to apologize for referring to George W. Bush as a 'deserter.' What I meant to say is that George W. Bush is a deserter, an election thief, a drunk driver, a WMD liar and a functional illiterate. And he poops his pants. In fact, he shot a man in Tucson 'just to watch him die.'" For the rest of his screed: www.michaelmoore.com
I guess that's humor in the same vein as seeing Janet Jacksons Super Bowl "wardrobe malfunction" as edgy entertainment.
That doesn't make any sense.
posted by tbogg at 11:36 PM
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Oh, the humanity....
Man rips epaulet off of boob
posted by tbogg at 11:03 PM
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Overruled by the focus group, God demands to have His name taken off the credits. Bible now attributed to 'Alan Smithee'.
Some editing of Mel Gibson's Jesus Christ: Jerusalem Nights:
Mel Gibson, responding to focus groups as much as to protests by Jewish critics, has decided to delete a controversial scene about Jews from his film, "The Passion of the Christ," a close associate said today.
A scene in the film, in which the Jewish high priest Caiaphas calls down a kind of curse on the Jewish people by declaring of the Crucifixion, "His blood be on us and on our children," will not be in the movie's final version, said the Gibson associate, who spoke on condition of anonymity.
The passage had been included in some versions of the film that were shown before select groups, mostly of priests and ministers.
"It didn't work in the focus screenings," the associate said. "Maybe it was thought to be too hurtful, or taken not in the way it was intended. It has been used terribly over the years."
On the other hand, the focus froup was quite supportive of the Mary Magdalene/Caiaphas boob exposing scene at the end of their "Rock Thy Body" duet.
Hey. It's already got an R rating. Why not?
(Okay. That's three boob mentions in a row. I'm done now)
posted by tbogg at 10:59 PM
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Non-corporate plug.
An email I got today:
Greetings and salutations from Buffalo,New York. I'm emailing to acquaint you with the finest band in this crumbling city--Jackdaw. They're a celtic influenced rock band with loads of charisma and a finely honed pop sensibility.(imagine: the Pogues filtered through the american working class experience) That's our aim.
We have abandoned the idea of signing with a major label(as if they'd want us) and have decided to go it on our own. Given the symbiotic nature of the- corporate dominated--radio landscape we realize how daunting our task.The reason for contacting you is to make aware our music to people we think might like it. Hopefully our musical mayhem is right up your alley. For a small taste of Jackdaw visit: www.brokencans.com for music and testimonials. Should you like us, spread the word.
fraternal regards,
kingsley
I liked what I heard...so I'm spreading the word.
posted by tbogg at 10:34 PM
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Blood in the water....
Hey. Who woke the press up?
Q Scott, you expressed some outrage this morning that Democrats are questioning whether President Bush shirked his military duty with the Texas Air National Guard. Is the White House trying to come up with any records or any eye-witnesses to demonstrate that he did show up for his last two years in Alabama?
MR. McCLELLAN: Terry, I would just say that it was a shame that this issue was brought up four years ago during the campaign, and it is a shame that it is being brought up again. The President fulfilled his duties. The President was honorably discharged.
Q Scott, can I follow that up?
MR. McCLELLAN: Do you have a follow-up?
Q Well, the question actually was whether or not you're trying to find any eye-witnesses or any records to prove --
MR. McCLELLAN: Terry, this was addressed four years ago, and like I said, it was a shame that it came up then and it's a shame that some are bringing it up again.
Dana, did you have one?
Q The Democrats have been attacking the President for months on a lot of issues. Why this issue -- why is it that you're choosing to respond to this particular issue, where in the past you've --
MR. McCLELLAN: The reasons I said. It is really shameful that this was brought up four years ago, and it's shameful that some are trying to bring it up again. I think it is sad to see some stoop to this level, especially so early in an election year. The President, like many Americans, was proud to serve in the National Guard. The National Guard plays an important role in the security of America. And the President was proud of his service.
Later:
Q Scott, can I ask you about, again, the National Guard thing? As you know, the President was committed to a six-year term, and what's at issue is the last two years. And the commander of the Alabama unit in which Bush was assigned in 1972 said that Lt. Bush never showed. That is absent without leave, otherwise known as AWOL, which is the charge that the Democrats are making. Can you be specific then about those last two years which are in question --
MR. McCLELLAN: Norah, we already have been specific. We were specific four years ago when this shameful accusation was made. I think you need to go back and look at the facts. The President was honorably discharged. He fulfilled his duties. It is really sad that people are now stooping to this level once again. And people should condemn this.
Q So where was he, then, in that period when his commander says he did not appear?
MR. McCLELLAN: This has already been previously addressed four years ago. Yet some people continue to stoop to the level that they are now stooping to --
Q You're not addressing the substance of the charge --
MR. McCLELLAN: No, we already have --
Q So the White House position is that the honorable discharge answers the question, that as far as the President's commanding officers were concerned, he preformed his duties honorably, and that's it?
MR. McCLELLAN: People that are discharged honorably are people that have fulfilled their duties. And we appreciate the service of all those people who are currently in the Guard and all those that were previously in the National Guard. We welcome all that they do to help make this country safer and better.
When cornered, talk about the great job the National Guard is doing. Unless, of course, you're given the opportunity to tell everyone that the President is "focused":
Q Some Republicans are expressing concern with the slippage of the President in the polls, and they're feeling that the White House and the President, himself, are not responding very effectively to the criticisms that the Democrats are making. Is there any plan for you guys to change --
MR. McCLELLAN: This kind of sounds like a chance to try to draw me into the election. I remind you that this President remains focused on our nation's highest priorities. This President is focused on winning the war on terrorism, protecting the homeland and creating an environment for even stronger job growth. And that's where the President's focus is. There will be plenty of time for the American people to look at the choice that they face next November. And we welcome the opportunity to discuss that. But the President remains focused on our nation's highest priorities.
He's also focused on appreciating what a great job the National Guard is focused on doing and the important role they play in America. Especially the ones who aren't going AWOL.
Focus...must focus......
posted by tbogg at 3:18 PM
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Joementum runs out of...well, actually there never was anything called Joementum
You can't say that Lieberman's campaign crashed and burned when it never even left the gate:
Democrat Joe Lieberman, facing an uncertain showing in his must-win state of Delaware, was making contingency plans Tuesday to withdraw from the presidential race, according to sources close to the campaign.
The campaign was making calls to close supporters asking them to be at the Hyatt Regency in Arlington, Va., Tuesday night at the postelection party. If Lieberman does not win at least one state - and his best hope is Delaware - he will make his concession speech there, said the sources, who spoke on condition of anonymity.
I think a campaign that calls Delaware a "must-win state" may be the ultimate definition of the politics of lowered expectations.
posted by tbogg at 2:37 PM
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Spanking Andy
Eric Alterman is never going to achieve Honorary Eagle Rank in the Sullivan Scouts if he keeps popping off like this:
Speaking of whom, say one thing for Mr. “Here’s the News from My Bathroom,” every time I think the guy has peaked, he manages to surprise me. Imagine two anonymous people on the planet: One guy is a “GayCatholicToryGAPmodel” who takes credit for liberating Iraq with his modem, and one guy fought with heroism in a war for his country, both in Vietnam and when he returned. So guess who is a “pompous, do-nothing, faux-populist, Establishment blow-hard with the Vietnam obsession”? I wonder how many bullets the tough-guy blogger has taken for his obsessions. (Anybody ever aim an AK-47 at that P-town toilet?) If you’ve got a strong stomach, you can find it here.
Ouch.
posted by tbogg at 2:30 PM
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All you Lieberman voters. Yeah, both of you....
It would probably be incorrect to say that Lieberman's campaign is going down in flames since it never even managed to taxi down the runway, let alone achieve lift-off, but if you're cold, scared and lonely, and you need a place to go, well, here's someone who really understands your needs:
Two clear points have emerged from the Iowa and New Hampshire primaries. The first point is that the Democratic choice is now between a Massachusetts liberal and an angry radical from Vermont. Thus, the Democratic choice is really between "left and lefter."
The second point of the early primaries is that the heart of the Democratic Party has flatly rejected the moderate views of Sen. Joe Lieberman. Like most Americans, Lieberman supported the war on terror and the war in Iraq. Unlike other candidates, Lieberman recognized the significance of the capture of Saddam Hussein. Lieberman also championed the creation of the Department of Homeland Security -- yet Democratic voters cast their ballots elsewhere. While other Democratic presidential candidates flip-flopped, straddled and otherwise ran from their previous support of the war, Lieberman stayed true. Thus, left-leaning primary voters have rejected Lieberman's support of the war.
Like most Americans, Lieberman supported the historic educational reform bill known as the No Child Left Behind Act. This act gives local educators more management flexibility and holds schools accountable for student achievement. However, this has not resonated with left-leaning primary voters. Lieberman has been the one Democrat on the presidential trail to talk about values and the importance of the role faith-based institutions play in our society.
Oh. It was wriitten by Ed Pozzuoli, a Fort Lauderdale attorney and former chairman of the Broward County Republican Party.
posted by tbogg at 10:14 AM
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It's not a celebration...it's a football game.
Jeebus. How stupid has this country become in the past three years?
The Federal Communications Commission launched an investigation into Sunday's controversial Super Bowl halftime show yesterday and FCC Chairman Michael K. Powell telephoned Mel Karmazin, president of CBS parent Viacom Inc., to express his outrage, saying the entertainment giant should have known what was going to transpire during the show.
The FCC probe will encompass the entire halftime program -- including the brief exposure of singer Janet Jackson's breast and the sexualized dance routine precipitating it -- to determine if it violates indecency standards set in law and enforced by the FCC.
If indecency violations are found, each of Viacom's 200 owned and affiliate stations could face a penalty of up to $27,500. FCC officials said the agency may also pursue penalties against CBS and the individual performers, Jackson and Justin Timberlake.
[snip]
"I am outraged at what I saw during the halftime show of the Super Bowl," the FCC chairman said in a statement. "Like millions of Americans, my family and I gathered around the television for a celebration. Instead, that celebration was tainted by a classless, crass and deplorable stunt. Our nation's children, parents and citizens deserve better."
The other FCC commissioners issued similar statements. In addition to the racy halftime show, some of the commercials shown during the game featured previews for violent movies and jokes employing scatological humor.
[snip]
Powell said his unhappiness with the halftime show went beyond Jackson's exposure. It "wasn't even the most offensive part," the FCC chief said in an interview. "It was the finale of something that was offensive. The whole performance was onstage copulation." He added, "This really crossed a heinous line."
If Powell thinks that was "onstage copulation" he ought to get together with Clarence Thomas and compare notes.
Welcome to the fifties. Prepare to be bored.
posted by tbogg at 9:11 AM
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Monday, February 02, 2004
Write Your Own Punchline Day
The New York Times puts the ball on the tee.
Bush Says He Will Appoint Commission on Intelligence
(Update): Looks like the New York Times changed their mind.
This just in:
We Have Always Been At War with Oceania
posted by tbogg at 9:47 AM
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Volunteers of America
Tom Toles
posted by tbogg at 9:37 AM
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New to the links....
The Department of Louise.
Go say "hi". Maybe drop off a pie.....
posted by tbogg at 9:26 AM
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Shocked, hurt, betrayed.....
Fox News contributor and radio "personality" (if you expand the definition of "personality' to inlcude someone you've never heard of) Mike Gallagher is outraged and angry and even a little sad this morning about that "filthy display" last night:
The Super Bowl halftime show created the kind of rage and disgust in Middle America that was, I suppose, intended by those who staged the show. After all, when pop star Justin Timberlake pulled open singer Janet Jackson's top to expose her bare breast for the grand finale of the show, it was no accident. Teams of people had to be involved in the planning and execution of this single act of contempt for every man, woman and child who would find this crass and vulgar display offensive.
But strangely enough, I'm feeling another emotion besides anger. I feel overwhelmed by sadness at this most recent (and most prominent) example of the flush of our nation's cesspool we call prime-time entertainment. Sure, I was shocked and appalled by what these performers did. But I can't shake this pervasive feeling of sadness. So many people to feel sorry for, so much hurt and harm done by one tasteless, classless act on an international stage like halftime of the Super Bowl.
I feel sorry for Janet Jackson herself. One day she may have to describe to her grandchildren why she allowed herself to be treated like a second-rate whore in front of millions of people.
I feel sorry for Justin Timberlake. This simple, immature young man who was blessed with some marginal talent and great opportunities decided to go along with the plan to degrade and exploit the sexuality between a man and a woman in order to shock a worldwide audience full of impressionable children
I feel sorry for CBS-TV. An otherwise impeccable broadcast, complete with a down-to-the-wire finish between two fine football teams was forever tainted by the network's apparent desire to titillate and pander to the lowest common denominator.
Because, we all know, that the NFL would never pander to the lowest common denominator.
I feel sorry for parents all over the country who were sitting in front of the television with their young children. I think of proud dads watching the big game with their young sons for the first time and having to explain what happened.
...and then trying to coax those same sons out of the bathroom and , hey, what are you doing in there and why is the door locked?
posted by tbogg at 8:32 AM
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''Brit Hume is a journalist of tremendous accomplishment, distinction and credibility...No really...What's so funny?"
The sad state of journalism:
Is Fox News Channel ''fair and balanced,'' as its motto claims?
Or is that slogan a clever marketing line designed to hide Fox News political tilt to the right?
And with its success -- by far, it's the No. 1-rated cable news channel -- have journalists failed to challenge Fox News on its boast?
These questions have been raised before. But now, a well-known journalist may reignite the discussion: Geneva Overholser, former ombudsman of The Washington Post, has resigned from the board of the National Press Foundation because it plans to honor Fox News anchor Brit Hume at its annual dinner in Washington, D.C., on Feb. 19.
Past recipients of the group's Sol Taishoff award include TV newscasters David Brinkley, Dan Rather, John Chancellor, Jane Pauley, Barbara Walters and Nina Totenberg.
Hume, the ABC White House correspondent who joined Fox in 1996 and anchors a nightly newscast, doesn't deserve the award because he and Fox practice ''ideologically connected journalism,'' Overholser says.
''Fox wants to do news from a certain viewpoint, but it wants to claim that it is 'fair and balanced,' '' she says. ''That is inaccurate and unfair to other media who engage in a quest, perhaps an imperfect quest, for objectivity.''
[snip]
Ed Fouhy, chairman of the four-person committee that unanimously voted to give Hume the award, rejects Overholser's argument. ''Brit is an excellent journalist,'' says Fouhy, who at one time was Hume's boss at ABC. ''I admire him and his journalism.''
Says Fox's Irena Briganti: ''Brit Hume is a journalist of tremendous accomplishment, distinction and credibility. We are proud he is being recognized.''
They can put his little prize in the Fox Trophy Case, right next to O'Reilly's Peabody award.
(Thanks to Nina)
posted by tbogg at 8:10 AM
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Sunday, February 01, 2004
Ronald Reagan birthed a baby
Since last week was Intelligence Failure Week in America, I thought this selection from Kevin Phillip's American Dynasty was timely:
At any rate, the national security state was only slightly wounded in the sixties and seventies, rebounding to thrive in the eighties and nineties despite a few bumps after the breakup of the Soviet Union, when the CIA briefly feared for its future. More to the point, two men named George Bush would be CIA director, vice president, or president of the United States for seventeen of the twenty-eight years between 1976 and 2004. In a very real but little understood sense, the Bush dynasty was already getting under way in 1980-81 when George Bush went from the CIA directors job to the vice presidency, a jump no one had ever managed before and one that brought a new and unfamiliar mind-set to the executive elected office.
In 1981, because of Bush's CIA experience--and perhaps also because of the influence of the White House chief of staff, James A. Baker III, who had managed the Texan's 1980 nomination campaign--President Reagan issued National Security Directive 3, naming the vice president to head a Special Situation Group to identify national security crises and plan for them. A new era of clandestine arms sales, massive armaments buildups, secret diplomacy, and covert actions, perhaps as much Bush's doing as Reagan's, was about to unfold in the Middle East generally and in Ira, Iraq, and Afghanistan specifically. With it, the seeds of two Persian Gulf wars and hundreds of terrorist strikes would be fertilized and watered.
If anyone thinks that Bush and his cabinet were duped by bad intelligence (other than the genetic kind), you're kidding yourself.
posted by tbogg at 8:59 PM
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But it did make us forget about what bad singers they are.
Houston, we have a boob.
Of course, nothing was better than this line (read in voiceover) from the Cialis ad:
Although a rare occurrence, men who experience an erection for more than 4 hours should seek immediate medical attention.
In case Janet's boob didn't do it for you...
(Looks like Drudge is having a Bad Santa moment with this one. Look for the Bluenose Brigade to manufacture plenty of outrage over this in the coming week. Hey, all men know that talking about boobs sure beats the hell out of working))
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