The Unbearable Lightness of DeanIt's raining dumb

Former Hugh Hewitt Man-Teat Milker, Dean Barnett back on Jan. 9,2007 on "Smarter than the Average Bear" Mitt Romney:

In a unique fundraising event that combined lots of modern-day viral marketing with a smidgeon of old fashioned phone-banking, the Romney campaign raised over $6.5 million. There has never been anything comparable to it in American politics. Although the money primary is just beginning, Mitt Romney looks like he’s going win that one as handily as he won the right-wing media primary.

But it’s not just about the money. Under no circumstances would Mitt Romney’s campaign lack for funds. If he wanted to, he could probably self-finance a presidential run with the loose change in between his sofa cushions.

What yesterday shows is that the Romney campaign, like his business career, will be marked by innovation. The Romney campaign won’t be relying on techniques that were moldy back when David Letterman was actually funny. Nor will it just trod the road that Joe Trippi and the Howard Dean campaign paved in 2004.

Leaving aside the fact that Romney's poll numbers still lag behind Sleepy Fred's Country Bear Campaignoree, it should be pointed out that Romney's "unique fundraising event" was a dog and pony show for the press, where Mitt's CEO buddies came armed with their rolodexes and dialed for dollars to their best buds ("the idea, according to Romney finance director Spencer Zwick, was for his supporters to use their own contacts -- Christmas card lists, for example -- and not to be handed a list of names to cold-call.") who had undoubtedly been prepped to expect the calls. Bold! Innovative ! Mitt!

Dean, now working at the increasingly laughable (well, they hired Dean, didn't they?) Weekly Standard:

RON PAUL TOOK IN $4.2 million in honor of Guy Fawkes Day Monday. While this is a wonderful haul for the congressman, it's not quite accurate to say he raised it or even that his campaign raised it. Paul supporters organized the event on their own with minimal coordination with the campaign.

Naturally, the champions of "people power" have rushed forward to praise this event and point out how it can be replicated. Markos Moulitsas, perhaps the leading authority on how to make it look like you've personally created an internet phenomenon even when you had nothing to do with it, has already rushed out an essay summing up the Paul phenomenon. Moulitsas's analysis comes replete with mind-numbing platitudes and easy-to-repeat formulas for other candidates to apply, presumably once they've retained an internet guru like Moulitsas to show them the way.

[...]

Paul is a fringe candidate who broke through into being a cult figure. To use a metaphor that seems oddly appropriate, Dr. Paul has gone viral.

You see, bringing in your rich friends (Mittiots) to call their rich friends is innovative (if you've never heard of Bush Pioneers) because they did it in one day, that makes Mitt "smarter than the average bear". But when the Paultards (copyright Wonkette) raise $4.2 million from non-CEO's in one day, that makes Ron Paul the "Don't Tase Me, Bro Candidate".

Barnett's loyalty to Mitt is admirable, but it's not going to get him adopted. Mitt already has five idiot sons...