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  • Tuesday, January 07, 2003

     

    I am an Army of One....I am also a hot throbbing hunk of manhood.

    Looks like the Army is trying to get enlistments up again.

    Television viewers in Webster were startled Monday night when a community access show about the U.S. Army was interrupted by roughly 20 minutes of explicit gay pornography.

    snip

    The unscheduled programming found its way onto the air on Webster Cable Access 12 between 8 and 9 p.m., apparently during the middle of Army Newswatch, a program produced by the U.S. Army.

    By the time Auger was able to get to the office last night, the pornography was off the air. Supervisor Cathryn Thomas said residents have told her the station apparently reverted back to Army Newswatch.

    Callers to the Brother Wease morning show on WCMF-FM said that the gay porn program seemed to have a German military theme to it involving an older officer and younger men.

    I remember that Hogan's Heroes episode. It was something about Major Hochstetter, Newkirk, and a tunnel...


    posted by tbogg at 2:34 PM

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    Driving Miss Daisy Lott

    Looks like Trent won't have to get behind the driving wheel.

    The Senate this week will take up a measure allowing former Senate Minority Leader Trent Lott, R-Miss., to keep his taxpayer-subsidized car and driver, senior Senate sources from both sides of the aisle told Fox News.

    However family retainer, Rochester, may have to go, news of which has caused Miz Lott to take to her chambers with the vapors where she will consume an appropriate dosage of laudanum sent over by Miz Laura who has moved on to heavier barbituates and absinthe since the girls went off to college and she doesn't have to share anymore.


    posted by tbogg at 1:49 PM

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    Okay. They can sit at the lunch-counter, but they have to keep their hands off the white women.

    Journalists! What are you going to do with their kind? Looks like three of them were acting all uppity in Texas

    A small group of journalists invited to tour the Bush ranch in Crawford, Texas, last Thursday "limited themselves to small talk" for 90 minutes, as one of them put it, after White House officials suggested Bush might otherwise cut short the tour. But another group of reporters was not so compliant. Three journalists, suspecting Bush would pay a visit to the Crawford Coffee Station on New Year's Eve, strolled over for lunch in hopes of being there if he arrived. A White House staff member appeared, wrote down their names and urged them to leave, telling them Bush "has said he won't come if you stay." The scribes stood by their cheeseburgers. "We told him that we were paying customers and had no intention of leaving," said Rachel Graves of the Houston Chronicle. The White House backed down, and Bush got his burger

    Those obstreperous little scalawags wouldn't have gotten away with this if Trent Lott were still alive, by cracky....

    (thanks to Jon for this...)


    posted by tbogg at 1:10 PM

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    That was then, this is now.

    Yesterday Republicans mouthpieces said the stock market surge was because of President Can't Count To Twentyone With His Pants On's impending stimulus plan. Today he announced it....Dow down 30 points.

    ...and uggabugga asks a question that, you know the press would never, ever, ever ask:

    From the White House website:

    "This is a plan that provides tax relief to the working citizens. It's a plan that is a very fair plan."

    So why is it that half the cost of the plan will come from eliminating taxes on dividends - an income stream you get without working?

    D'oh!




    posted by tbogg at 12:56 PM

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    M-I-C-K-E-Y F-R-A-U-D

    Ted Barlow does a good job on Mickey Kaus who really should be spending his peri-menopausal years reviewing hot fast cars and the latest in hair replacement technologies, and not economic policy.


    posted by tbogg at 12:41 PM

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    Now that's the kind of math George Bush can understand...

    From The Hampster:

    AL FRANKEN
    No, no, those were, those were great. I'm going to misuse one now. In the six years, about six years of both Bush administrations, the elder and the younger, there has not been one net new job created, and so here . . .

    GEORGE STEPHANOPOULOS
    (Off Camera) Private sector.

    AL FRANKEN
    No, not one net new job, just in the whole economy. So this is, extending that logically, that means that if the Bushes had run the country from its inception to the present, no one in this country would have ever worked. We'd be the poorest country, we'd be poorer than Somalia.

    GEORGE STEPHANOPOULOS
    (Off Camera) I don't think the Columbia Economic Department is gonna be hiring you any time soon.

    AL FRANKEN
    Numbers don't lie


    posted by tbogg at 12:27 PM

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    Dildos, Free Markets, and Ben Shapiro

    I have to admit that Ben Shapiro became my favorite rightwing punda-loon only after the SD Union dropped the columns of Joseph Perkins. Perkins, for those who never read him, was a former aide to ex-VP Dan Quayle. Perkins managed to parlay that "insider" gig into one that allowed him to rewrite Heritage Foundation press releases into profoundly fact-challenged columns that the UT found fit to publish. The fact that Perkins was black and conservative, making him rarer than a George Bush deep thought, allowed the UT editors to bite their collective tongues and ignore the many sarcastic Letters to the Editor that inevitably followed a Perkin's column.

    But then I discovered Ben, the Hey Arnold! of conservative punditry and I knew I had discovered a new source for twisted conventional wisdom, a narrow minded outlook, and stunted social development. Much has been made of Ben's failure to dabble in the conjugal arts (he claims religion, but I think we all know better), and he wonders why everyone is so obsessed with his "sexual status".

    Maybe it's because of columns like this from the Daily Bruin:

    UCLA has entered the zone of no return. The Zone d'Erotica, that is.
    Zone d'Erotica is a sex shop located just 375 feet from Gayley Terraces. This store, offering the only kind of deviancy UCLA lacks, adds a great deal to the campus: a place to buy assorted pornographic videos, sex toys and lingerie. Just what the homeowners, students and faculty need...


    There are limits to capitalistic enterprise, and this is one of them. While the government should keep involvement in the workings of the free market to a minimum, the sex industry is one market that shouldn't be too free. It is an illegitimate, unfortunate function of the market that distribution centers exist for such twisted items, and while the government cannot ban them, it can restrict them. Gayley Avenue is a good place to start.

    The Westwood Homeowners Association has every right to protest this travesty. Would you want a sex shop opening across the street from your home? If you had a five-year-old child, would you want him to ask "Mommy, how much is that vibrator in the window?"

    Sex shops happen to have a certain, less-than-reputable audience. Such stores gather a very exclusive, perverted clientele likely coming from near and far to find such a treasure trove. Must we wait before the shop is already established to realize that sordid men walking around Westwood holding Wicked Enterprise videos will make the area look bad?

    snip

    Any paper equating a Christian bookstore with a pornographic sex shop is not worth the paper it is printed on. This is another disgusting example of an attempt to strip away stable values and implement a set of "subjective, tolerant, diverse" values.

    Anyone who believes that a Christian bookstore promoting God, love and morality is as offensive as a sex shop promoting animal lust and the degradation of sexual intimacy into a merely hedonistic act is quite simply a disgrace to the human capacity for knowledge and reason.

    The Westwood Homeowners Association has the moral and intellectual high ground. The kind of situation that would allow a child to be exposed to pornography mandates some sort of action, governmental or otherwise. There is no benefit to having this sort of smut in any decent neighborhood.

    For those keeping score at home, sex involves "deviancy", and is "twisted", "perverted", "sordid", and involves "animal lust and the degradation of sexual intimacy into a merely hedonistic act"...but only if done right, I might add.

    I think that we can safely say that young master Shapiro's "sexual status" indicates the soul of Carol Ledoux trapped in the body of a young, male, socially inept, poli-sci undergrad.

    Now that's twisted....








    posted by tbogg at 12:10 PM

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    The Sally Quinn Suicide Watch

    DC Social life is deader than Bob Dole's dick with President Cartoon Network at the helm.

    The capital's most glamorous annual evening, the Kennedy Center Honors, was far from over. The gala finale, a stirring rendition of "America the Beautiful," led by James Taylor, was still under way — and the supper dance had yet to begin — when Karl Rove, President Bush's political mastermind, darted out of the center's Opera House last month.

    Mr. Rove had a good reason: his boss was leaving, too. "The security aide came and said, `Mr. and Mrs. Rove, it's time to move now,' " he recalled. Last fall, at a Kennedy Center concert commemorating the first anniversary of the Sept. 11 attacks, the finale was taped for television at the end of the first act, so the president could leave early, stranding the live audience to sit through the rest of the show

    Apparently that was the night of a "very special episode" of Boy Meets World.

    "Well, it's difficult to make a judgment, because these are serious times," said Buffy Cafritz, a veteran Republican hostess. "The Reagan years were more joyous, and people were out more. President Clinton could stay up and keep my hours, 2 and 3 a.m. in the morning. The town is just different. If it's not Iraq, it's the market. There isn't a lightness as there has been in the past."

    Looks like Buffy the Vampire Hostess misses Big Bill.



    posted by tbogg at 10:00 AM

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    Tax code gives hummer to owners of Hummers

    This is just grotesque:

    You see SUV's on the road everywhere these days, but sport utility vehicles are some of the least efficient and most expensive vehicles out there-- unless you get an unusual tax break that will save you plenty.

    Karl Wizinsky just bought a giant Ford Excursion, even though he says he doesn't really need it.

    "You certainly get a good view of the road," he says.

    But he admits that he bought it because of the big break he can get on his tax return.

    snip

    At a time when the nation's priorities are to improve gas mileage and reduce dependence on foreign oil, the government has instead provided an incentive for just the opposite -- the biggest, least efficient SUVS available.

    Here's how:

    The incentives were designed to give tax breaks to small business owners buying trucks for construction or farming. But the tax code was amended before the very largest class of SUVs -- those over 6,000 pounds, existed. The SUV's carry the classification "light truck" even though they are used almost exclusively as passenger vehicles.

    As a result, people whose business involves hauling nothing more than themselves reap huge benefits buying Land Rovers, Cadillacs -- even Hummers.

    A new Land Rover, for example, with a sticker price of nearly $72,000 will cost only $50,000 after the tax break -- a savings of more than $21,000.

    "I don't think the intent of the law was large luxurious SUV's," Jenkins said. "But that's been exactly what's happened."








    posted by tbogg at 9:30 AM

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    Daschle says "No thanks"...If only Joe Lieberman would follow suit

    The very uncharismatic Tom Daschle has decided to take a pass on running for President since Gephardt has already filled the "no-chance-to-win" slot.


    posted by tbogg at 9:22 AM

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    Chain, chain, chain, Cheney's a fool.....

    JM Marshall talks about the total screw-up in the Bush Administration...and it's not the usual suspect.

    Cheney's bad judgment is akin to Trent Lott's ugly history on race: Everyone sort of knew it was there, only no one ever really took notice until it was pointed out in a way that was difficult to ignore.


    posted by tbogg at 9:16 AM

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    You scratch my yellow stripe, I'll scratch yours....

    Looks like noted chickenhawk and flag-draped coward Saxby Chambliss is settling into his new role in Washington. And he found a friend who has a lot in common with him:

    "I value his advice on terrorism," Mr. Bush said of Mr. Chambliss at a March campaign rally in Atlanta. "He's sound when it comes to counterterrorism. He's been in the Oval Office to give me sound, solid advice. And I've listened to it every time he's come in there."

    Maybe President Cowardly Lyin' will invite Mr Chambliss to fly on Air Force One with him to Nebraska during the next terrorist attack so they can hide out together at Offutt Air Force Base which has been recently code-named Chicken Coop 1 by the Secret Service.





    posted by tbogg at 8:04 AM

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    Take my advice...don't take my advice

    "Focus group moderator" Frank Luntz, who has given up any appearance of non-partisanship, has some advice for Republicans.

    Since 9/11, there has been a sea change in the mindset of America. As a focus group moderator, I hear a very different voice of a very changed America. In these uncertain times, people are no longer content to subsist on the sound bites, sloganeering, and other stratagems of political gamesmanship.

    Then he says:

    As long as Republicans make a show of cutting waste, fraud and abuse, they will be forgiven for a little red ink.

    They just need to be sure to not use sound bites, sloganeering, and stratagems of political gamesmanship while they make a show of cutting waste, fraud, and abuse.

    This looks like a job for ...Karl Rove.







    posted by tbogg at 7:49 AM

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    Monday, January 06, 2003

     

    Like an anti-semite.... Touched for the very first time

    The Virgin Ben pulls out what few rhetorical tricks he has in response to the Rittenhouse Review. He claims he is being called a "nazi" when it didn't happen, and then points out that refering to him as a virgin, besides being "lame" is also......wait for it....."anti-semitic".

    Who knew?

    I hope non-Gentile Ben (also referred to by my good friend Will as the Original Wanksta) eventually gets someone to touch his pee-pee soon since the last time it was handled by foreign hands was at his bris.

    Then again, considering his........ Ben-ness....maybe that's asking a lot.



    posted by tbogg at 11:34 PM

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    No time for lunch, I have "Doing Your Daughter-In-Law" at 1, with "Suicide is Painless...To Me" at 3.

    Snotglass is not available since he is attending a George C. Roche III "family values" conference at Hillsdale College.

    You remember George Roche III. The guy who was humping his daughter-in-law and drove her to suicide? Yeah, that "family values" guy.

    Hope Snotglass (named after the Apostle the Bible doesn't like to talk about) picks up some valuable tips...



    posted by tbogg at 11:10 PM

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    The Winter of Our Disconnect

    Iraq has no nuclear weapons and is not even close to having them. They are threatening no one. What few allies we have left aren't too interested in war but Bush can't wait to go after them.

    North Korea is close to having them, continually threaten their neighbors, and are desperate enough to do it. A million people could die and the world economy could be shattered. The administration can't get together with more of our allies who could be the most affected by war. Bush won't talk to the North Koreans and changes his mind on policy like he's explaining away his insider trading days again.

    We are so screwed.



    posted by tbogg at 10:51 PM

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    It is class warfare.

    As Paul Krugman shows, the Republicans are engaging in class warfare and the mainstream "journalists" are afraid to call them on it.

    Nonetheless, the faithful laud our glorious leader's wisdom. For a variety of reasons, including the desire to avoid charges of liberal bias, most reporting is carefully hedged. And the public, reading only praise or he-said-she-said discussions, never grasps the fundamental disconnect between problem and policy.

    And so it goes with the administration's "stimulus" plan





    posted by tbogg at 10:32 PM

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    Why I love the Freepers....

    It's irritating that Noonan (a great writer and good conservative who's nonetheless occasionally too saccharine for my taste) would perpetuate the myth that Bush "wobbled" for a few hours after the Twin Towers were hit. He did not wobble! As the leader of the nation he was forced to be very careful about his personal security at a time when multiple unknown factors existed about the resources and intentions of the enemy.

    He behaved prudentially, and exactly as he should have! Noonan should know this.


    3 posted on 01/06/2003 6:42 AM PST by beckett

    I'd get me a freeper for a pet, but it wouldn't be prudential.



    posted by tbogg at 3:54 PM

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    New batty time, same batty Peggy

    I think that the Wall Street Journal moved Noonan the Loon to Mondays because The Bachelorette is on Wednesday nights and poor Peg just couldn't concentrate on that Thursday deadline, what with all those cute guys after just one woman. But that's okay, because Peggy has found her Mystery Date, a steady guy as comfortable as an old shoe. He's uncomplicated by deep thoughts, a religious man, a family man, and best of all, he's not a cow's head suspended in formaldehyde. He just: George.

    The whole world was watching, and America was watching with keen concentration, when he did his best work: his visit to ground zero and "I can hear you; the world hears you"; his Oval Office interview a few days after the attack when he said, "I am a loving man, but I have a job to do"; his speech to Congress in which he described the nature of the menace we face and spoke of American resolve; his spectacular live question-and-answer session with children when Vladimir Putin was meeting with him in Texas, in which both took questions from kids and Mr. Bush's humanity shined through; and a host of other public moments. The boy done good.

    Yup. He was pretty "spectacular" handling those tough probing questions from those eight and nine year olds, and live no less. But wait, there's more...

    But with Mr. Bush things aren't a big emotional drama. He seems stable. This is a relief. You get the impression he's like what he of course was, a businessman. When things work, good; when they don't, change. It's not personal. It doesn't have to be messy. It's not Shakespearean.

    ...and he's still that bright-eyed, fresh-faced businessman, doing the same thing to the country that he did to his businesses...plunging them into debt and chaos. You've got to admire that kind of steadfastness, that blinkered tenaciousness.

    Peggy then clues us into why liberals just haven't taken the steady, rock-solid, emotionally vacant, George Bush to our collective bosoms:

    Liberals like their leaders interesting. I always think this may be because some of them have not been able to fully engage the idea of a God, and tend to fill that hole in themselves with politics and its concerns. If the world of government and politics becomes your god, and yields a supergod called a president, you want that god to be interesting.

    Well, I wouldn't say that we make government and politics a god (especially those of us that are atheists...which would be...kind of absurd) but we do tend to like our leader, also known as the "Leader of the Free World", to sometimes have deep thoughts or express an interest in something other than reading baseball box scores or avenging the the near asassination of his dad ("After all, this is a guy that tried to kill my dad."). We see the world as a kind of complex place that sometimes requires complex answers. We're funny that way.

    Peggy finishes with a flourish:

    Conservatives, on the other hand, don't look for god in government, for part of being a conservative is holding the conviction that there is no god in government. They like complicated personalities in their TV shows and from actors and opera singers, but they want steadiness and a vision they can agree with from their presidents. Actually I think conservatives want their presidents the way they want their art: somewhere in the normal range. They don't like cow's heads suspended in formaldehyde and don't understand that as high art; by 1998 they thought Bill Clinton was the political version of a cow's head in formaldehyde, and they didn't like that either.

    And so my liberal friends say: Why do people like Mr. Bush? And they want an interesting answer. But I do think part of the answer is: Because he's not complicated and perhaps not even especially interesting as a person. We just love that.

    "Bill Clinton was the political version of a cow's head in formaldehyde"

    Just roll that phrase around in your mouth. Mull it over. Think about it.

    It's somewhere in the Peggy Noonan "normal range".

    Enter at your own risk.

    **************************************
    No More Mr. Nice Blog on Peggy

    Jesse at Pandagon on her too

    Looks like a Peggy pile-on. She wishes...











    posted by tbogg at 1:33 PM

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    What I didn't learn in law school....

    Mona Charen, who, for some reason gets paid to write columns, takes on John Edwards:

    John Edwards, the handsome, and comely and attractive senator from North Carolina (well, those are his chief assets) has announced plans to seek the Democratic nomination for president. A relative newcomer to politics, Mr. Edwards has caught the eye of party elders due to his, well, his looks.

    Mr. Edwards does start with one big disadvantage, though. He's a trial lawyer, and while this allows him ready access to the deep pockets of his fellow trial lawyers, it causes many Americans to wrinkle their noses. Clearly, Mr. Edwards has been working on how to spin the trial lawyer handicap, and he's decided to frame it this way: His multimillion-dollar business mau-mauing companies out of large settlements is really being "a champion for regular people."..... (my emphasis)

    The law school-educated Charen makes the assertion that Senator Edwards was "mau-mauing" companies . for big settlements. She doesn't explain the term 'mau-mauing' and I assume it's not a legal term. I do know that the expression is a favorite of Ann Coulter and Michelle Malkin, so I guess it involves some feminine, right-wing Mandingo fantasy that must keep Trent Lott up at night, dampening his sheets. Anyway, since she brought it up, what kind of settlements did he manage to 'mau-mau'?

    According to The Washington Monthly:

    The defining case in Edwards' legal career wrapped up that same year. In 1993, a five-year-old girl named Valerie Lakey had been playing in a Wake County, N.C., wading pool when she became caught in an uncovered drain so forcefully that the suction pulled out most of her intestines. She survived but for the rest of her life will need to be hooked up to feeding tubes for 12 hours each night. Edwards filed suit on the Lakeys' behalf against Sta-Rite Industries, the Wisconsin corporation that manufactured the drain. Attorneys describe his handling of the case as a virtuoso example of a trial layer bringing a negligent corporation to heel. Sta-Rite offered the Lakeys $100,000 to settle the case. Edwards passed. Before trial, he discovered that 12 other children had suffered similar injuries from Sta-Rite drains. The company raised its offer to $1.25 million. Two weeks into the trial, they upped the figure to $8.5 million. Edwards declined the offer and asked for their insurance policy limit of $22.5 million. The day before the trial resumed from Christmas break, Sta-Rite countered with $17.5 million. Again, Edwards said no. On January 10, 1997, lawyers from across the state packed the courtroom to hear Edwards' closing argument, "the most impressive legal performance I have ever seen," recalls Dayton. Three days later, the jury found Sta-Rite guilty and liable for $25 million in economic damages (by state law, punitive damages could have tripled that amount). The company immediately settled for $25 million, the largest verdict in state history. For their part, Edwards and Kirby earned the Association of Trial Lawyers of America's national award for public service

    I can see how a case like that would offend all right-thinking Americans.

    Maybe this is why Charen writes bad columns instead practicing law before a jury.



    posted by tbogg at 11:36 AM

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    Let the blog-god sort them out.

    Steven Den Beste over at USS Clueless feels that the best way to solve the Palestinian problem is just to kill them all.

    But increasingly I'm finding myself feeling as if the world would be better off if someone went in and shot every damned one of them and piled the lot in an unmarked grave

    snip

    I know that's wrong. I know it could never happen, and that it will never happen, and that it should never happen, and I would never actually advocate anything like that. But what I'm finding is that every time I read about a Palestinian being killed by the Israelis, my first emotional reaction is, "Good riddance." I've reached the point where I feel nothing at all when I read about them dying. I have reached the point where I don't care at all, not even slightly, about their pain and hardship. They have ceased to be persons to me. I'm no longer even interested in hearing their side of the story.

    He later uses the unfortunate term: final solution.

    I suppose not, but as time goes on it is harder and harder for me to tell myself that it is the wrong answer. In any war, there is one way to positively settle the issue, and that's for everyone on one side of it to die. Whatever else you might say about that, it is at least a final solution.

    You have to read the whole thing (sorry) to understand his point, but I still find it odd that someone who can go on and on about the most mundane matters in his blog can be so exhausted by a war in which he has no vested interest.



    posted by tbogg at 9:44 AM

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    Tax the poor, feed the rich

    Seeing the Forest explains the Give Steve Forbes a Hard-on Act of 2003.

    Remember, your Social Security retirement money was given away to the really rich in the 1980's, through tax cuts. Now the money you currently pay into the Social Security system is also being handed to the rich through even more huge tax cuts. And the portion of the tax money that you pay that goes out as interest on the debt is also being given to the rich in the form of debt interest payments. A lot of the military budget is handed to wealthy corporations. The pension money that you would have received if you worked at a corporation was handed out to the rich in the 1980's in the form of increased stock price when pensions were stopped, and you were instead told to save your own money through an IRA or a 401K account.


    posted by tbogg at 8:22 AM

    |

    Sunday, January 05, 2003

     

    The man fromn Ar-busto.

    This is not a joke.

    He, on the other hand, is.





    posted by tbogg at 11:12 PM

    |

     

    Pay no attention to that floundering economy behind the curtain

    Looks like those five terrorists from Canada may not be terrorists... or even exist.


    posted by tbogg at 10:50 PM

    |

     

    Can he just keep her from making movies?

    Antonio Banderas says "no" to anymore Melanie Griffith surgeries.



    posted by tbogg at 10:43 PM

    |

     

    Too Much Time On My Hands Watch

    While there is a certain humor factor in the notorious CAP Alert reviews, you've got to hand it to Ken Waight over at Lying In Ponds who has come up with a way to quantify the partisanship of newspaper columnists.

    ...and wouldn't you just know it that Paul Krugman came out on top as the most partisan of all columnists. Not Michael Kelly or Bob Bartley. Of course he only reviewed the The Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, and New York Times. Not that conservatives like Andrew Sullivan will point this out when refering to the rankings. This implies that Krugman is somehow more partisan than columnists like Ann Coulter, Rich Lowry, or Cal Thomas, who don't write for those publications, but are syndicated.

    Seems dishonest doesn't it? And dishonesty is so hard to quantify...





    posted by tbogg at 10:38 PM

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    Welcome back

    Media Whores Online is back....tan, rested, and ready to overthrow the dominant media paradigm or, more to the point, shine a spotlight on the toads in the journalistic pond.

    Be sure to vote for Whore of the Year. Warning...it has sound. Additional warning, Howie Kurtz isn't even nominated. That is an oversight.


    posted by tbogg at 9:27 PM

    |

     

    "Duh" story of the year.

    Reuters discovers the concept of "freeping".

    Democrats and Republicans alike turned to the Internet for news during last fall's elections, but conservatives were more likely to weigh in on online polls, according to a study released on Sunday.

    snip

    Nearly half of Republicans who went online for election news said they liked to register their opinions in online polls, compared with 28 percent of Democrats

    Of course online polls are the kind of "sound science" that conservatives believe in...as long as they reflect their views. Kind of like "intelligent design".


    posted by tbogg at 9:21 PM

    |

     

    Let's not kid ourselves...

    The Virgin Ben 'splains why he is a virgin.

    Yes, I am a virgin. Being an Orthodox Jew, I am required by halacha (Jewish law) to remain abstinent until marriage. If calling me a virgin is supposed to be an insult, than it is a poor attempt at an one. It makes me wonder why the Rittenhouse Review is so concerned about my virginity. Then again, they are oversexed whores who enjoy the bedtime company of pigs, so I shouldn't wonder at all

    As I have said before: some people choose abstinence, some have it thrust upon them.

    Like many, I'm not concerned with the Virgin Ben's sexual status so much as his misogynistic and sniggering attitude regarding women. Regardless of Shapiro's sexual status, his attitudes towards women is medieval at best. Whores or saints.

    Here is the deal, I refrain from discussing Orthodox Judaism since I don't know anything about it, Ben should do the same about women.


    posted by tbogg at 8:51 PM

    |

    Thursday, January 02, 2003

     

    Nothing is sacred.

    Using Zeppelin to sell Cadillacs. London Calling selling Jaguars. Now, Morphine's Buena to sell MGD.

    Oof.



    posted by tbogg at 9:14 PM

    |

     

    But that I am forbid To tell the secrets of my prison house

    Rain is wet.

    Reese Witherspoon is cute as a button.

    The Bush White House is kinda secretive.

    A telling example came in late 2001 when Attorney General John Ashcroft announced the new policy on the Freedom of Information Act, a move that attracted relatively little public attention.

    Although the new policy for dealing with the 1966 statute that has opened millions of pages of government records to scholars, reporters and the public was announced after Sept. 11, it had been planned well before the attacks.

    The Ashcroft directive encouraged federal agencies to reject requests for documents if there was any legal basis to do so, promising that the Justice Department would defend them in court. It was a stark reversal of the policy set eight years earlier, when the Clinton administration told agencies to make records available whenever they could, even if the law provided a reason not to, so long as there was no "foreseeable harm" from the release.

    Turn on the lights and they scurry back under the couches.

    Duh.



    posted by tbogg at 9:09 PM

    |

     

    If John Ashcroft has wet dreams, this is one of them. Except for the "sorry" part...

    Police 'sorry' for porno raid


    posted by tbogg at 8:48 PM

    |

     

    Woohoo! Three-peat fror Houston! We're #1! ... We're #1! ...We're #.....(huff huff) I gotta sit down....

    Put down that deep dish, Chicago. Houston has you beat again for America's Fattest City. The Ten Worst. Houston, Chicago, Detroit, Philadelphia, St Louis, Cleveland, Atlanta, Columbus, Dallas, Charlotte.

    Congratulations Texas and Ohio with two cities each. Have a Little Debbie on us.

    I'm disappointed. San Diego has dropped from #1 to #3 to #5 in three years as the Fittest City. I blame it on the transplants.



    posted by tbogg at 8:42 PM

    |

     

    ...and Omar was saved. But what about Billy's grandpa?

    With logic like this, how could they possibly hate us?

    Oh, that's right. We gave the world Family Circus. We had it coming.


    posted by tbogg at 8:24 PM

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    More painful than watching Bush on Jeopardy...

    Noted potatohead Michael Kelly atempts to be droll and witty.

    Carter Returns Nobel Peace Prize

    'Too, Too Ridiculous,' Ex-Prez Says

    PLAINS, Ga., March 17 -- In a move that stunned veteran narcissistic personality disorder observers, a smiling Jimmy Carter today announced that he had decided to return the coveted Peace Prize awarded to him last year by the Nobel Committee.

    "I may be the most vainglorious, self-regarding, preachifying old coot since Henry Ward Beecher, but even I know when a joke has gone too far," said Carter

    Sadder than a Ben Shapiro pick-up line.



    posted by tbogg at 8:12 PM

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    It all makes sense now.

    After LOTR The Two Towers made $200 million in it's first 12 days, the comment was made that the dollar amount was extraordinary since no one who saw it had a date.

    Then I did a little checking with our good little buddy, the Virgin Ben. According to Master Shapiro:

    And about $25 of that is from me. I have now seen LOTR: Two Towers three times, and it improves with repeated viewing. I can't be happier that in less than two weeks, Two Towers is hitting $200 million. The message of the movie is so great! I won't quote any of the lines here (I'm not going to spoil it for you), but the concept is completely in sync with the tack we need to take in the War on Islamism.

    Moving on, Ben thinks we should get going on that war.

    Kofi Annan and his band of anti-American, anti-Semitic morons are proclaiming that there's no reason to attack Iraq. He says they're fully cooperating. One anonymous inspector said they haven't found "one iota of concealed material." Well of course not, you stupid fools! That's why they're concealed! How tough is this? They sent in 12,000 pages of garbage pretending it's a report. They deny that they have any bio or chem weapons. We know they do. There it is, reason for war.

    ...but you know Ben won't be fighting. But he would, you know, except that he's really not ""interested".

    Rep. Charles Rangel (D-NY) voted against the resolution to authorize the use of force in Iraq. But in an op-ed in the NY Times, Rangel is now calling for re-institution of the draft. Personally, I have no problem with the draft. I am not all that interested in joining the military as a volunteer, but if I were called upon to serve, I would do so.

    Rangel wrote:

    But as a combat veteran of the Korean conflict, I believe that if we are going to send our children to war, the governing principle must be that of shared sacrifice. Throughout much of our history, Americans have been asked to shoulder the burden of war equally

    To which our Ben replied:

    This is fair enough. But when the army calls for the re-institution of the draft, I'll listen, not when some semi-pacifist New York representative thinks so.

    Buck-buck-buck-bacaw.....

    It would be a shame in the third installment of LOTR opened next year and Ben were off fighting Islamo-facists.








    posted by tbogg at 12:06 AM

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    Wednesday, January 01, 2003

     

    Giving President Shut-In the respect he deserves.

    Dana Milbank is either getting punchy or he is finally admitting that he is covering the greatest PR campaign for a village idiot ever.

    Of course, Bush, even when hidden from view and clearing endless brush, continues to work the phones and do his day job. Still, his aides feel compelled to remind the public of this. "The president immediately engaged on this issue," Powell told Tim Russert on Sunday regarding North Korea. "President Bush has been engaged from the very beginning."

    The administration has found it useful to provide such reminders, at regular intervals, that the president is paying attention to the issues of the day.

    International environmental concerns? "The president has already been very engaged in these issues and plans to be engaged," Paula Dobriansky, undersecretary of state for global affairs, said in August. The India-Pakistan standoff? "The president is fully engaged," White House press secretary Ari Fleischer said in June. The review of military resources? "The president has been engaged," Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld attested last year. The China spy plane crisis? "He has been very engaged," said a senior Bush aide, briefing reporters.

    This president, it would seem, has been engaged more often than Elizabeth Taylor.






    posted by tbogg at 11:34 PM

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    Misanthrope or mysoginist?

    Ann Coulter doesn't like anyone, but you really have to marvel at a column where she attempts to defend some of her more offensive utterances only to start it off with the title: Journalism: Where Even The Men Are Women. I'm sure, in her usual ham-handed way (has anyone ever used the phrase "What I meant was..." more than Ann?) she seems to want to attack journalists by somehow inferring that they are "women" as if there is something wrong with that. As an alleged woman herself, is this a sign of self-loathing?

    Should we care?


    posted by tbogg at 11:02 PM

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    I swear...

    I did a couple of long posts yesterday, only to have them go bye-bye when I went to post and publish. I got so frustrated, because they were works of genius (I swear) that I haven't posted since then.

    Good news, though. The brilliant Digby has started his own blog at Hullabaloo, and you should check it out on a daily basis. He rocks.


    posted by tbogg at 9:52 PM

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    Monday, December 30, 2002

     

    I'm back....

    Just returned from Indian Wells where I was unable to make a decent connnection with my laptop to the Internet (mainly because I didn't feel like doing any reformatting...I was on vacation, dammit!) so instead I spent a great amount of time by the pool reading books (remember those?) and watching my daughter order virgin daquiris and charge them to the room.

    It appears that during my absence I received about 25 e-mails regarding an altercation between zizka & tapped which I still haven't read through (I'm still on vacation, dammit) and it also looks like I had my 100,000th visit to tbogg as of today, which is kinda cool since I started this back on 9/19.

    Since I didn't look at a newspaper, watch the news, or have access to the internet, it's going to take me a day or two to get caught up, but I expect to be back to full-time blogging by tomorrow.



    posted by tbogg at 5:47 PM

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    Wednesday, December 25, 2002

     

    Mother died today. Or maybe yesterday, I don’t know.

    Dr. Laura is a bad bad person...but we already knew that.

    Maybe someday she'll open herself up to "the benign indifference of the world". Than again. Maybe not.


    posted by tbogg at 6:45 PM

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    If Sir Isaac Newton were alive today he would almost be as old as Barbara Walters...

    Happy 360th Birthday, Ike. On the count of three, everybody fall down...1, 2,......


    posted by tbogg at 5:29 PM

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    Comicbook guy voice: "Worst Christmas gifts ever"

    The Seattle PI runs a column with readers writing in about their worst Christmas gifts ever.

    My favorite:

    My father got me the complete works of William Shakespeare. I was 7 at the time. Another Christmas, Dad gave me a diet book, an etiquette book and a book on how to attract men with a card that said "with the hope you'll grow into a proper young lady." I was 24.







    posted by tbogg at 5:26 PM

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    Bring me the hand of Bill Gates...

    Suppose you endured the checkout line at the grocery store only to find that you were short on cash, or you'd forgotten your wallet. What if you could settle the bill with just the touch of your finger?

    Kroger Co. (NYSE:KR - news), the largest U.S. supermarket chain, is offering some customers just that opportunity, testing finger imaging as a method of payment in three of its Texas stores.

    A machine scans the index finger, matching the customer's unique fingerprint with the individual's account.


    posted by tbogg at 5:11 PM

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    Mickey is busy sitting shivah. But Goofy can do the service right after he's done hearing confession...

    The Happiest Place on Earth doesn't want to be the Most Christian Place on Earth.

    Walt Disney World doesn't advertise its theme parks as the holiest place on earth -- just the happiest.

    Still, some religious leaders are dismayed and disappointed that, after today's popular Christmas services at the Contemporary Resort, the next organized Christian worship at the resort will not take place until Easter.

    Citing space problems and concerns about fairness, the giant resort has stopped the regular Sunday services for Protestant and Catholic visitors that had been held at the Polynesian Luau area since 1975.

    Christmas and Easter services will continue.

    "It no longer seemed appropriate to only offer two options for worship to our guests," said Rena Callahan, a Disney spokeswoman.

    Also being discontinued are the Teacup baptisms and the Mr. Toad's Wild Bris.




    posted by tbogg at 5:04 PM

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    We need a cognitive dissonance check on register 7, please....

    Wal-Mart.

    There's no room for a pregnant Midge at Wal-Mart.

    The world's largest retailer pulled Mattel's pregnant Midge doll from store shelves. The doll is being sold as part of the "Happy Family" set that included husband Allan and a son doll Ryan.

    "Customers said they were not happy with the pregnant Midge doll so Wal-Mart removed the entire Happy Family set," said Melissa Berryhill, a spokeswoman for Wal-Mart. The sets were pulled two weeks ago.

    The pregnant Midge doll wears a pink skirt and has a removable stomach, within which sits a baby. The box says "Mommy loves her new baby." The dolls come with a cradle and other baby gear.

    Okay. I have been in a Wal-Mart exactly once in my life and it appeared to my untrained eye that every woman in the store had at least six kids, in varying states of undress, in tow. So when I read this, I have to wonder how the average Wal-Mart shopper can be offended at a pregnant doll since the Wal-Mart demographic seems to dominated by breeding factories who seem to know as much about birth control as they do about causal anomalies in Kaluza–Klein gravity theories .

    Of course the next question is: what will Mattel do with all these returned, knocked-up Midges? Maybe Operation Rescue will buy them up and save them.


    posted by tbogg at 4:53 PM

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    John Ashcroft dodges a theological bullet.

    We know that over the past year and a half, Attorney General John Ashcroft has been arresting guys that look like this.

    Had Ashcroft attempted to have this guy picked up and held incommunicado, as he has been known to do, he would have undone a whole lifetime of sucking up to the Big Guy.

    Here's why.


    posted by tbogg at 4:21 PM

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    Christmas greetings from San Diego...

    ...where it was a brisk 41 degrees this morning which is like -10 degrees to those of us who are native to this sunny climate. I know everybody didn't get their Christmas wish because I hear this guy didn't resign in shame over having blown the surplus as well as putting us on the cusp of WWIII.

    Retail sales were down this Christmas which is suprising since you would think that people would have run up their credit card debt to the max which they may not have to repay, since President Decline of Western Civilization still has two years to destroy everything that is good and worthwhile about America before the Canadians come down and pick through the rubble.

    I got a baseball autographed by Brooks Robinson. What 'chu get?


    posted by tbogg at 4:14 PM

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    Tuesday, December 24, 2002

     

    Merry Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Ramadan, Festivus, and other pagan rituals.

    I have family duties today, so no blogging (although I intend on blogging Christmas day because snark never sleeps...). So I leave you with a gift from Club Top 5:

    The Top 18 Signs the Santa at the Mall Is Nuts

    18. Shaves head and beard, then insists on being called "Santa Kurtz."

    17. Tells kids about the comparative kill ratio of the AK-47 over the Daisy Air Rifle.

    16. Those nasty chewing tobacco streaks in his beard.

    15. Has a complimentary tray of North Pole "Tundra Oysters" ready for the toddlers.

    14. After every child's request, asks, "Wouldn't you rather have a nice big bag of clams?"

    13. The twinkle in his eye and the twitch of his nose are due to a lack of medication.

    12. Every so often, snaps into a Slim Jim and growls, "You've been bad and now you're going down, punk!"

    11. Actually enjoys it when small children urinate on his lap.

    10. Promises children O.J. will be cleared of all wrongdoing.

    9. Caught drinking red wine with fish during break.

    8. "Hey kid, bet I can wet my pants faster than you can!"

    7. Insists on blowing his nose in children's hair.

    6. Despite massive photographic evidence to the contrary, claims to have never worn white gloves or shiny black boots.

    5. That snowy beard? Nothin' but nose hair.

    4. Answers every child's toy request with "Dream on, pee wee!"

    3. When a child wets on his lap, he returns the favor.

    2. Instead of a candy cane, gives each kid a pack of Marlboros and a homemade venison pie.


    and the Number 1 Sign the Santa at the Mall Is Nuts...


    1. While it's admittedly a nifty trick, blowing smoke rings out of his tracheotomy hole is just scaring the hell out of the kiddies.

    Happy holidays from tbogg...


    posted by tbogg at 2:08 PM

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    Monday, December 23, 2002

     

    How much do want 2+2 to add up to?

    The check is in the mail. I'll call you. Yes, I'll respect you in the morning. No, that doesn't make your ass look big. The Bush Administration uses "sound science".

    All lies.

    Read this.

    When psychologist William R. Miller was asked to join a panel that advises the National Institute on Drug Abuse, he thought he had been selected for his expertise in addiction. Then a Bush administration staff member called with some unexpected questions.

    Did Miller support abortion rights? What about the death penalty for drug kingpins? And had he voted for President Bush?

    Apparently, Miller said, he did not give enough right answers. He had not, for example, voted for Bush. He was never appointed to the panel.


    Researchers are complaining with rising alarm that the Bush administration is using political and ideological screening to try to ensure that its scientific consultants recommend no policies that are out of step with the political agenda of the White House.

    Administration officials say they are merely doing what their predecessors have always done: using appointment powers to make sure their viewpoints are well-represented on the government's scientific advisory boards, an important if unglamorous part of the policy-making process. There are more than 250 boards devoted to public health and biomedical research alone, composed of experts from outside the government who help guide policy on gene therapy, bioterrorism, acceptable pollutant levels and other complex matters.

    But critics say the Bush administration is going further than its predecessors in considering ideology as well as scientific expertise in forming the panels. A committee that merely gives technical advice on research proposals, as opposed to setting policy, has even been subject to screening, something the critics say was unheard of in previous administrations.

    "I don't think any administration has penetrated so deeply into the advisory committee structure as this one, and I think it matters," said Donald Kennedy, past president of Stanford University and editor of Science, the premier U.S. scientific journal. "If you start picking people by their ideology instead of their scientific credentials, you are inevitably reducing the quality of the advisory group."

    The government has been taken over by by theological thugs and American industry whores

    Thanks again, Ralph.












    posted by tbogg at 10:54 PM

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    Multiple wars mean more employment opportunities. See: "Cannon fodder" in your local classifieds.

    Now that Bill Frist has wrestled the conch shell away from Trent Lott, the Republicans are going to be a lot nicer to African-Americans.

    The GOP is working on an agenda designed to highlight its commitment to minorities without reversing positions on issues such as affirmative action, The Washington Post reported.

    Among the issues being considered are school choice initiatives, more assistance to inner-city charities and increased funding for minority programs. However, Republican sources told the Post that that agenda is not expected to offer many new ideas, but will rather repackage old ones to show how they help minorities

    Same wine...new Senate Majority Leader.

    Other ideas to help out minorities include eliminating taxes on dividends, a permanent tax break for the richest 1%of Americans, drilling in ANWR, and appointing Charles Pickering to the US Court of Appeals.

    I sure that Charlotte Beers is already busily "re-branding" these issues for Karl Rove and Senate Majority Leader Cat Killer Bill.


    posted by tbogg at 4:13 PM

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    Where would Jesus park?

    In Texas they have found the No Parking Sign of Turin.

    A “No Parking” sign posted to keep the street in front of a South Alpine home clear of unwelcome vehicles has done just the opposite, with many local residents claiming to see the face of Jesus Christ in dark patterning on the sign.


    posted by tbogg at 1:56 PM

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    Bob Graham thinks about taking the plunge

    Sen. Bob Graham said Monday he is seriously considering running for the 2004 Democratic presidential nomination, saying he is not satisfied with President Bush's leadership as the country faces "unprecedented" economic and military problems.

    The fact that so many Democrats are thinking of making a run at President Brain Deficit, even with his high popularity ratings, makes you wonder what their internal pollsters are telling them. I like Graham, vene though he's kind of a stiff on the stump, but he would make a nice VP candidate with Kerry at the top of the ticket, and he should bring along Florida's electoral votes. The Democrats are all but assured of having the big states (you know, the ones with people actually living in them) like New York, California, Illinois, and Pennsylvania. Florida would be a nice addition.

    I look forward to seeing what the Daily Kos will have on this.


    posted by tbogg at 9:14 AM

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    I guess he decided to go....

    Joe Strummer is dead.

    This is really sad. When the Clash released London Calling back at the beginning of 1980, music basically sucked. Styx, The Knack, Village People, and Do Ya Think I'm Sexy-era Rod Stewart. Although the Sex Pistols were getting all the attention for Never Mind The Bollocks, it was the Clash that reminded everyone that you could not only make noise, but you could make noise with a hook: London Calling, Clampdown, I'm Not Down, Wrong 'em Boyo, and the unlisted pop gemTrain In Vain.

    Paul Simonon, Mick Jones, Topper Headon, and Joe Strummer pulled music out of the doldrums.



    posted by tbogg at 8:56 AM

    |

    Sunday, December 22, 2002

     

    Bush didn't do well in the swimsuit competition either....

    Time magazine gives Time Man of the Year to three women who showed uncommon bravery and an understanding of honesty and ethics.

    Karl Rove is still looking up those words here...


    posted by tbogg at 11:29 PM

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    Well, if they had worn those neat SS uniforms I would have gone....

    Roger Ailes ( the not corrupt one) points out that chickenhawk Pat Buchanan doesn't like be called on the carpet...

    ELLSBERG: By the way you weren’t in the White House during those years. You were draft age and you didn’t manage to...

    BUCHANAN: That’s bull shit.



    posted by tbogg at 12:58 AM

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    Hearts and minds redux.

    Remember the Viet Nam war? The one we lost because we didn't win their hearts and minds?

    Well. We're starting out on the wrong foot again.

    What Nahla Mohammed remembers from that day, however, is not the sirens or the jet planes, but running into her son on the street just after she finished shopping for supper. He asked what she would fix, she recalled. Meat, vegetables and soup, she answered. He headed off, anticipating the family meal.

    Ten minutes later, according to a cousin who was there, a powerful blast slammed him to the ground as metal shards sliced through his body. Mohammed Sharif Reda, a 23-year-old mechanic married just two months and planning to build a house for his family, was among four people who Iraqi officials said were killed Dec. 1 in what they call an “undeclared war” being waged here in southern Iraq.

    These are the people that are supposed to welcome us with open arms when we overthrow Saddam and take over the oil wells. But don't worry about them. They're just collateral damage. George Bush isn't losing any sleep over them, and he won't be part of the occupying force. Go back to sleep.

    And if militant Islamists decide to restart attacks here in America, you can rest assured that George Bush will survive as he is whisked off to Nebraska or some other American backwater while the citizens of this country cower and die. All because he wants America's oil that is under their sand, and he wants to gain revenge for his dad.

    Everyone besides George Bush suffers because he has no heart and he has no mind.

    Thanks again Ralph....







    posted by tbogg at 12:50 AM

    |

    Friday, December 20, 2002

     

    Trent says:

    May all your Christmases be white.


    posted by tbogg at 8:20 PM

    |

     

    We'll get rid of the logo...but we won't give up our decoder rings...

    I guess the idea that convicted felon John Poindexter is heading up the Bush administration's domestic snooping service was creepy enough. Now it looks like they got rid of the all-seeing eye logo.

    Best known for his starring turn in the Iran Contra Affair, Poindexter is now the man in charge of the Information Awareness Office—a data-mining/snooping project the Pentagon is developing via The Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency. Perhaps you’ve noticed their delightfully creepy logo staring at you from this page.

    The logo, in fact, must have been a bit too creepy. It’s no longer visible on the official IAO website

    Not that this means that they will do less snooping. Thye just won't wear the screened t-shirts and carry the tote bags with the logo on it anymore.

    I feel better already.




    posted by tbogg at 8:05 PM

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    Somewhere on the AM band...

    Caller: "Hi Dr.Laura, I'm a long time listener, first time caller. I really love what a straight shooter you are, and the way you make people own up to their mistakes and turn their lives around"

    Dr Laura: "Why thank you. Someone has to take the bull by the horns and tell people to straighten up and live right"

    C: "I agree. Maybe you can help me."

    D.L.: "I'll sure try. Talk to me.."

    C: "Well, my mother was just found murdered in her apartment.."

    D.L.: "That's awful! You poor woman. You have my deepest sympathy."

    C: "Yeah, thanks. Actually we haven't been that close for some time. In fact, it appears that she has been dead for months and nobody knew."

    D.L.: ".......You never attempted to talk to your mother during this time?"

    C: "No. We don't get along, and I have a very busy career and I just didn't take the time. Besides we had some differences."

    D.L: "....such as...?"

    C: "Well first of all, we are a devoutly religious family..."

    D.L.: "That's good..."

    C: "But I got divorced and that didn't settle well within the family..."

    D.L.: "Didn't you try and work it out? Do you have kids? You should have tried to save it for the kids..."

    C: "But I wasn't happy. Anyway, then there were those naked pictures of me all over the Internet..."

    D.L.: ".................."

    C: "All and all it was a pretty bad situation..."

    D.L.: "Let me get this straight. Your mother was murdered months ago in her apartment and you had no idea until they just found the body. You're deeply religious and have kids but still got divorced because you were too selfish and self centered to do what was right. On top of that, you willingly posed naked for a bunch of pictures that ended up all over the internet. Am I correct so far?"

    C: "Yeah....I guess so..."

    D.L. "You filthy ignorant slut. Have you no shame? You're not fit to be a mother. You disgust me. You are a horrid person with no redeeming qualities and should have your children taken away. You know nothing about having a healthy relationship with your family. You obviously didn't love your mother and your actions prove that you don't give a damn about your own kids. How did you become this monster? I have to go throw up now....."





    posted by tbogg at 7:50 PM

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    Welcome Interesting Times

    Now, go get the bad guys....


    posted by tbogg at 6:22 PM

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    Please show your Kool Kid Kard to enter...not so fast, Mickey...

    Apparently Mickey Kaus hasn't made the A-team quite yet. Now there are two errors in Arianna Huffington's lastest Salon column; one bad, the other, well, funny. The bad error is her attributing the "power of the people" that brought down Trent Lott to, as she puts it:

    It was in cyberspace that scores of bloggers -- including Josh Marshall of talkingpointsmemo.com, Glenn Reynolds of instapundit.com, Mickey Klaus of klausfiles.com, and Andrew Sullivan of andrewsullivan.com -- continued hammering away at the story, and eventually succeeded in moving it out of the shadows into the political spotlight.

    Now we know that it was Atrios, Josh Marshall, and Tim Noah who did the bulk of the heavy lifting after The Note noted the remarks. Reynolds blew it off, Kaus and Sullivan came on board later. As for the funny error:

    "Mickey Klaus"

    Who's the leader of the blogs, and no one knows his name? M-I-C-K-E-Y K-L-A-U-S.

    Back to the kid's table Mickey, looks like you're not welcome past the velvet ropes...



    posted by tbogg at 4:02 PM

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    Parody...or not?

    Ashcroft responded sharply to critics who charge that the Bill of Rights no longer safeguards certain basic, inalienable rights.

    "We're not taking away personal rights; we're increasing personal security," Ashcroft said. "By allowing for greater government control over the particulars of individual liberties, the Bill of Rights will now offer expanded personal freedoms whenever they are deemed appropriate and unobtrusive to the activities necessary to effective operation of the federal government."

    The Bill of Rights.





    posted by tbogg at 11:10 AM

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    Neo-Con vs. Paleo-Con Smackdown.

    Krauthammer vs Goldberg.

    Outside of the fun of watching the conservatives beat each other up, who cares? Anyway you slice it, the whole philosophy is still a big con job.



    posted by tbogg at 9:58 AM

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    Trolling for troglodytes.

    Albumen abuser Matt Drudge uses a headline to mislead the dimwitted regarding Sen. Patty Murray's comments on Bin Laden:

    SENATOR GOES WILD:NOTES BIN LADEN BUILT SCHOOLS, ROADS IN THIRD WORLD...

    Of course, what Murray was actually doing was asking students why Bin Laden remains so popular in the Middle East despite his terrorist activities.

    "We've got to ask, why is this man (Osama bin Laden) so popular around the world?," said Murray, who faces re-election in 2004. "Why are people so supportive of him in many countries … that are riddled with poverty?

    "He's been out in these countries for decades, building schools, building roads, building infrastructure, building day care facilities, building health care facilities, and the people are extremely grateful. We haven't done that.

    "How would they look at us today if we had been there helping them with some of that rather than just being the people who are going to bomb in Iraq and go to Afghanistan?"

    Pretty inflamatory stuff, eh? But it doesn't quite achieve the Trent Lott threshold now, does it?

    Don't tell the freepers though. Faced with the propect of Senate Majority Bill Frist who makes his fortune sucking the brains out of babies (as Ann Coulter would oh so delicately put it), they need something to lock and load about.

    Experience the hooting...experience the spittle...visit Free Republic.









    posted by tbogg at 9:48 AM

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    Peggy the Powerbroker

    Although I think La Noonan should have written the Christmas column I diagramed for her below (see Lubed Up...since I can't link right now), she instead chose to denigrate Trent Lott ('denigrate isn't what you think it is, Trent...) causing him to resign this morning.

    Of course that didn't stop her from jumping in and telling us what Bill Clinton was thinking again:

    You could almost see Mr. Clinton's mind whirling as Jonathan Karl interviewed him. Hmm, I could be high-minded and speak thoughtfully during what amounts to a public crisis, or I can play gut-ball politics and slam the enemy. No contest. Way to go, Bill, and happy holidays from a grateful nation.

    This isn't the first time that she has used her awesome mind-reading abilities on a Clinton. If only she would use her powers for the good of mankind, like figuring out why people purchase CD's by those assclowns called Creed. I mean, what are they thinking?


    posted by tbogg at 8:58 AM

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    A boy resigns in hardtime Mississippi...

    Trent Lott is calling it quits as Senate Majority leader.

    Republicans to elect rich-boy sadist and cat-vivisectionist Bill Frist.

    Believe it or not, that's a step up for Republicans.


    posted by tbogg at 8:37 AM

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    You try doing quadratic equation in a thong.

    Social scientists have long known that women’s preoccupation with their physical appearances can lead to low self-esteem, eating disorders and other problems. Fredrickson and her colleagues wondered if it might have an even broader mental effect. So they gathered a group of undergraduate students, 40 men and 42 women, for a test. One at a time, the students were asked to try on either a sweater or a swimsuit in a makeshift dressing room with a full-length mirror.

    They were told that the idea of the test was to measure whether or not they liked the garment better after wearing it for 15 minutes. So, rather than let those 15 minutes go to waste, they were then asked to take a 20-question advanced math test, supposedly as part of a separate study.

    When the results were in, the researchers found that the men did about the same on the math test whether they were wearing a swimsuit or a sweater. In fact, the guys did slightly better in swim trunks. The women, however, had significantly lower math scores if they were wearing the swimsuits. The authors published their findings in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.

    Additionally, on the essay question, all the women indicated a preference for world peace if selected as Bathing Suit Math Student of the Year.


    posted by tbogg at 8:28 AM

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    The cafeteria lady wants to know if she can have the heart after the performance. She's making meatloaf.

    Human Sacrifice At The Bizarre Bazaar

    Pleasantville Elementary School officials canceled a school event that was scheduled for Tuesday night because some parents objected to its subject matter.

    The school's third- through fifth-grade students had planned to present a performance called the "Bizarre Bazaar."

    But the principal of the Venango County elementary school says parents were upset that the show included a discussion about human sacrifices and Egyptian myths.






    posted by tbogg at 8:22 AM

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    The groom's still waiting at the altar

    J-Lo (the meagerly talented Jennifer Lopez to those who don't read People magazine) has called off her wedding to preppy cardboard cutout, Ben Affleck.

    Jennifer Lopez has called off her wedding to Ben Affleck - after a row with his best man.

    The Latino singer was furious when Ben's best friend Matt Damon tried to talk him out of it, claiming she was a "serial bride".

    In addition Lopez was furious after an evening of trying on clothes when Affleck commented, "Jesus, J. Everything makes your ass look big."

    Affleck is expected to take up with the much more sensible Lisa Marie Presley...


    posted by tbogg at 8:16 AM

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    I could have told you Vincent, this world was never meant for someone as boneheaded as you...

    Jim at Rittenhouse Review gives Norah Vincent a good slapping.

    When I read Vincent's column the other day, I was suprised that the LA Times even bothered to run it. While I thought it was a perfectly normal piece of blog-style writing, I didn't see it as the type of piece that the Times would carry since it was so blatantly self-referential. In fact, take away the name and you would swear it was one of Sullivan's off-hand blog entries.

    The Times can do better than that, although I'm not sure Vincent can.



    posted by tbogg at 8:07 AM

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    Archives are apparently archived

    Blogger has been having a problem with the archives so if you are looking for something old...bummer for you.

    I'll keep trying to put them back up.


    posted by tbogg at 7:55 AM

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    They say it never rains in Southern California.

    Bullshit


    posted by tbogg at 7:52 AM

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    Thursday, December 19, 2002

     

    Ad free at last! Ad free at last! thank God Almighty, we are ad free at last!"

    Regular readers of tbogg as well as people who are preternaturally perceptive may have noticed that the tbogg blog is now sans ads, depriving you of the opportunity to find lost classmates, entering free computer sweepstakes, and getting cel phones real cheap. This is because of a grant made possible by The Rittenhouse Foundation whose motto is " A better future through smarter thinking and less annoying flashing ads".

    Many thanks to Jim Capozzola for the unexpected gift of non-commercialism and allowing me to no longer have to work for "the man".



    posted by tbogg at 9:38 PM

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    Time to start lubing up...

    It's Thursday, which means it's Noonan time tonight. What will catch her fancy this week? Let's see, she did Lott & racism last week. And she probably won't do a Reagan tribute right now since he hasn't surged ahead of Strom in the 2003 Ole Yeller Sweepstakes.

    I think a Christmas column may be in order. Something about God speaking to the Virgin Marisleysis about bearing his son, Jes-elian who will be born in a Miami bodega built by strapping young shirtless construction workers misted with a sheen of fine manly sweat. Later they will be visited by the Three Wise Dolphins who will warn her against swarthy, hard-eyed men from the Mideast bearing camcorders and unpaid breakfast checks from Shoneys. Then it will snow; big tumbly white flakes of white snow that make us say This is snow because it is, and it's good because good is what it should be, and strangers will stop each other on the street and read each others minds and they will say yes, the snow is white and cold and good and there is a higher force who makes this good, cold snow that is white and is now snowing on the firemen with their tight uniforms clinging to their brave and well defined bodies, and their hoses that are full of goodness, and are taut with the expectation of meeting a middle-aged Catholic divorcee who is thinking I put my arms around him and yes and drew him down to me so he could feel my breasts all perfume yes and his heart was going like mad and yes I said yes I will yes and I could really use a cigarette right about now...

    Then she will wish us all a very Merry Christmas and go have that cigarette....if Michael Bloomberg doesn't mind.


    posted by tbogg at 2:16 PM

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    This just in...

    "There's only one person who hugs the mothers and the widows, the wives and the kids upon the death of their loved one. Others hug but having committed the troops, I've got an additional responsibility to hug and that's me and I know what it's like."—Washington, D.C., Dec. 11, 2002.

    Yeah. He's a moron....


    posted by tbogg at 10:50 AM

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    Do you have the director's cut of Dude, Where's My Car? in stock?

    You can buy a DVD of Crossroads with Britney Spears, Footloose with Kevin Bacon, and the crapulent St. Elmo's Fire, but you can't get Kenneth Branagh's Hamlet, Robert Altman's California Split, Daniel Petrie's Resurrection, Warren Beatty's Reds, or the Cohen brother's Miller's Crossing.

    The terrorists have won.



    posted by tbogg at 10:33 AM

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    The whine of the valkyrie

    Aryan Princess Ann Coulter is upset because the "liberal" media are keeping a shameful secret from the American public: both Trent Lott and Strom Thurmond used to be (gasp!) Democrats. Yup. Back in the day, before we had all these "problems", as Trent would put it, they were proud Democrats who respected black people...as long as they knew their place. Let's allow Ann to explain:

    What the Lott incident shows is that Republicans have to be careful about letting Democrats into our party. Back when they supported segregation, Lott and Thurmond were Democrats. This is something the media are intentionally hiding to make it look like the Republican Party is the party of segregation and race discrimination, which it never has been.

    In 1948, Thurmond did not run as a "Dixiecan," he ran as a "Dixiecrat" – his party was an offshoot of the Democratic Party. And when he lost, he went right back to being a Democrat. This whole brouhaha is about a former Democrat praising another former Democrat for what was once a Democrat policy.

    Republicans made Southern Democrats drop the race nonsense when they entered the Republican Party.

    When did Strom become a Republican? Well, that would have been in 1964...the same year that the Civil Rights Act passed. What did Strom have to say about the Civil Rights Act? I'm glad you asked. According to the defenders of white majority rights over at American Renaissance, Strom said:

    He called the Civil Rights Bill of 1964, “the worst, most unreasonable and unconstitutional legislation that has ever been considered by the Congress.”

    ...and the Republican Party welcomed him with open sheet-clad arms, because he was no longer welcome in the Democratic Party which had just gone too liberal on him. Hence the genesis of Richard Nixon's "Southern Strategy".

    Oh. And by the way, here's a parting shot at Strom from the good ol' boys at American Renaissance:

    Indeed, times do change, and so do people. But can even Sen. Thurmond forget the predictions he made of what federal arrogance, forced integration, and intrusive government would bring – predictions that have largely come true? Of course, for nearly 40 years, he has been on the payroll of a body he used to call tyrannical. For nearly as long, he has faced a press that heaps abuse on all his old principles and praises every step towards abandoning them. He has also grown old. Age, money and respectability are powerful forces, sometimes powerful enough to blind a man to the wisdom of his ancestors.

    I bet Ann wishes she had written that...


    posted by tbogg at 10:08 AM

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    Wednesday, December 18, 2002

     

    Substitute teacher night

    It's been a busy day at work and on the domestic front (Mrs. tbogg's unnatural needs, don'cha know) so I thought I would share a little something from the ever popular Club Top 5, just to get you in the holiday spirit. If you don't already have a membership, well, you really ought to get one.

    Anyway, here are some of the submissions for The Top 20 Excerpts from Badly Written Holiday Stories:

    The first of the Wise Men spoke: "Who is this most divine child?" "He must be the Son of God!" exclaimed the second. "And he shall be the King of Kings, as the Lord intended," said the third. But then the Supreme Court got involved.

    *****************

    Mrs. Claus trembled at the sight of Binky's swelling elfhood. "I may be short, Mrs. C.," he said huskily, "But I stand tall where it matters most."

    *****************

    "You sold your chocolate to buy me peanut butter!" he moaned. She responded with a shocked, "You sold your peanut butter to buy me chocolate!"

    *****************

    When little Billy saw on his globe that there is no land at the North Pole, he knew that Santa couldn't possibly have a workshop there. It was then that Billy realized that everything good in a child's life is a hollow lie intended to curb curiosity, and adults are wretched vermin who thrive in their authority -- authority based only in the filth and squalor of empty falsehoods. Through a haze fraught with ennui, angst and unbridled umbrage, Billy finished his cookie and drifted off to sleep.

    *********************

    Mark my words, the Lakers will be back or I'm not Larry King... Jesus Christ: class act... Eggnog tastes just as good in July... Remember this name: Jack Black... Last time I hung an ornament was '76... I finally saw Smallville, and it's one smart show....

    **********************

    And he vowed on that cold Christmas Day that he would do everything in his power, given the limits of his impaired depth perception, to get even with the Daisy Air Rifle Company.

    ***********************

    It was a dark winter night at the North Pole. I was after a poacher with a big-bore gun and a taste for venison. Naughty or nice, it doesn't matter to me -- a criminal is a criminal, and it's my job to bring them in. The name is Boxie, and I'm the senior elf in homicide division.

    ***********************

    Rudolph was hurt bad and knew it. Lurching forward one yard at time, he fought to stay awake. It was the only way he could control his nose. Step by painful step, the plucky reindeer ploughed forward, but it was hopeless; he had lost too much blood. As he slipped into unconsciousness, he felt his nose glowing like a lighthouse beacon. His last mortal sight was the circle of grinning Ewoks, spears held aloft, closing in.

    ***************************

    Santa never knew what hit him. A .22-caliber hollow-point double tap to the back of the head ended forever this semi-religious demagogue's heretical revolution of gifts for free. Sam Walton could finally rest in peace.

    ***************************

    The children used coal for its eyes, and a button for its nose. Then little Johnny placed the magic surgical mask upon its mouth and the eerily white snowman came to life! "Jacko the Snowman, at your service!" he said. "You kids ready to play?"









    posted by tbogg at 9:46 PM

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    New additions to the Hot Links

    PLA and Pandagon. I read them everyday, now I don't have to hunt for the links anymore.

    duh.


    posted by tbogg at 5:27 PM

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    Last elected President pees on Republican hornet's nest.

    Former President Clinton said Wednesday it is "pretty hypocritical" of Republicans to criticize incoming Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott for stating publicly what he said the GOP does "on the back roads every day."

    "How do they think they got a majority in the South anyway?" Clinton told CNN outside a business luncheon he was attending. "I think what they are really upset about is that he made public their strategy."

    He added: "They try to suppress black voting, they ran on the Confederate flag in Georgia and South Carolina, and from top to bottom the Republicans supported it."



    Click here to watch them go into a frenzy.

    (Warning: Initiate spittle shield before entering and watch out for the feces throwing...)


    posted by tbogg at 3:12 PM

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    Dr Lichter and Mr. Kelly

    Looks like Michael Kelly's new best friend, Robert Lichter has a lots of financing from people who lean right because their wallets weigh so much.

    The Center for Media and Public Affairs was founded in the mid-’80s by Robert and Linda Lichter, two academics who have made a career out of claiming to document leftist bias in the news media. Their stated mission was "to conduct scientific studies of how the media treat social and political issues," and they put great stress on their claim to non-partisanship. "It’s not in a scholar’s blood to have an ideology," Robert Lichter told the Washington Post (2/10/92).

    The Lichters’ funding and history belie this stance of objectivity. From 1986 to 1988, Robert Lichter was a fellow at the conservative American Enterprise Institute. Fund-raising letters for the launch of the Center for Media and Public Affairs contained endorsements from leading right-wing figures like Ronald Reagan, Pat Buchanan, Ed Meese and Pat Robertson.

    Robert Lichter’s writings and public statements also indicate a conservative worldview. At a conference sponsored by Accuracy In Media after the Gulf War, according to an AP report (4/27/91), "He said he was disappointed in statements by [Peter] Arnett upon his return from Baghdad that he was in the enemy capital on behalf of all CNN viewers, not just Americans. ‘I see a trend toward journalists seeing themselves as citizens of the world’ rather than patriotic Americans, Lichter said."

    Funding for the Center has come from the most prominent foundations of the right, including Smith Richardson (at least $298,000), Olin Foundation ($250,000), JM Foundation ($100,000) and the Coors Foundation ($55,000). (Smith Richardson gave the Center $40,000 in 1987 for its study on PBS.) These foundations also contribute heavily to more overtly right-wing media pressure groups like Reed Irvine’s Accuracy In Media, L. Brent Bozell’s Media Research Center, and David Horowitz’s Committee on Media Integrity.

    The Scaife Foundation, another major right-wing funder, gave the Lichters money for their book, The Media Elite, which argued that journalists’ personal political biases made their work unreliable. (The same argument, of course, could be made about academics like the Lichters.) The study featured in the book, based on interviews with journalists conducted in 1980, was widely criticized by scholars for methodological flaws. (See Columbia Journalism Review, Nov/Dec ‘85, March/April ‘87; Journalism Quarterly, Winter ‘87; Journal of Communication, Spring ‘88.)

    Can you get any more "non-partisan" than this?

    (thanks to the many who sent me this link...Joe Conason will have more on this tonight, I have heard)



    posted by tbogg at 2:49 PM

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    A lump of coal in the shareholder's stockings...

    I see Dick Cheney's gift to the Halliburton shareholders arrived early.

    Representatives for the Houston-based oilfield-services company once led by Vice President Dick Cheney were in U.S. Bankruptcy Court in Pittsburgh on Wednesday to settle most of the pending asbestos cases against the company and one of its former subsidiaries.The proposed settlement payment would include $2.8 billion in cash and 59.5 million shares currently worth about $1.2 billion.

    Halliburton had said in recent weeks it was close to a multibillion-dollar deal that would settle the 300,000 asbestos-related personal injury claims against it.

    Most of those claims were inherited four years ago when Halliburton — which also operates a huge engineering and construction business — acquired rival Dresser Industries Inc. for $7.7 billion. Cheney ran Halliburton at the time of the purchase.

    That's okay. Dick will make it up in military and oil services contracts in a couple of months.


    posted by tbogg at 2:01 PM

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    Relationships 101...his side of the story

    I got Things My Girlfriend and I Have Argued About emailed to me the other day. When you have some time...read it and see if anything sounds familiar.



    posted by tbogg at 1:12 PM

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    Once you have eliminated Professor Plum, the rest becomes elementary

    Poor Mickey Kaus. He is just fixated on the belief that Sid Blumenthal is behind all this Trent Lott brouhaha...and nobody believes him. That's what happens when your Clue cards say "Sidney Blumenthal...in the library...with an email".



    posted by tbogg at 1:07 PM

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    Half-assed or half-vast.......it's all the same to Michael Kelly.

    Following last weeks pathetic shot at addressing the serious issue of media bias, Michael Kelly provides us with another half-assed attempt to make his point that the media is "liberal". As I pointed out last week, there is an enormous body of conservative commentators who seem to be making ends meet by explaining all the gory details about us nasty liberals and why we hate America. Being a "word" guy and not a "numbers" guy, Kelly believes that by introducing a bunch of numbers in a column the reader will become so numbed by it all, you can get them to believe anything.

    This week Mr. Kelly introduces us to S. Robert Lichter of the Center for Media and Public Affairs who says:

    "The essential argument by the media is that, yes, most mainstream journalists may be left of center, but they operate in the tradition of objectivity, so this doesn't affect their coverage of the news," notes S. Robert Lichter, president of the independent Center for Media and Public Affairs. "What this argument fails to grasp is the way bias works in people. Yes, journalists tell the truth -- but, like everyone else, they tell the truth as they see it."

    As Lichter has written, "Even the most conscientious journalists cannot overcome the subjectivity inherent in their profession, which is expressed through such everyday decisions as whether a topic is newsworthy or a source trustworthy."

    To which we say, fair enough, even though he seems to disregard the use of editors as well as such mundane journalistic standards like fact checking, multiple verification of sources, and those niggling little libel and slander laws. Anyway, he provides Kelly (ironically an editor himself) with a few choice tidbits:

    As to fact: In 17 years of news content analysis, especially of network evening news broadcasts, Lichter's Center for Media and Public Affairs has consistently found evidence of liberal bias, and this has not changed in the past few years.

    • "Only 43 percent of all on-air evaluations of George W. Bush were favorable" in Bush's first 100 days in office (compared with a similarly negative 40 percent for Clinton in his first 100). In his first 50 days, Bush received 48 percent positive coverage, but only 36 percent was positive in his second 50. Only 29 percent of on-air evaluations from nonpartisan sources (anchors, reporters, experts, citizens) were positive to Bush.

    • Bush did get a terrific bounce from the rallying effect of Sept. 11. From that day through Nov. 19, 2001, Bush "received the most positive coverage ever measured for a president over an extended period of time'' -- 64 percent positive to 36 percent negative. But Bush's high of 77 percent positive that September was down to 59 percent within two months.

    • Coverage of the Bush administration's consideration of a military strike against Iraq, as seen in the network newscasts and in front-page New York Times stories from this July 1 through Aug. 25, was 72 percent negative.

    Please note the selective use of dates as well as random use of specific "media" in order to make his point. No numbers are provided by Kelly for the period during the Clinton administration known as the Great Presidential Fellatio Crisis where the "liberal" media was apparently asleep at the wheel (I know I never heard anything about it until much later...). Kelly & Lichter would have us believe that Bush's decline from a 9/12 high of 77% dropping to 59% in two months is somehow the fault of the media, without noting that Bush's popularity prior to 9/11 was sub-50% when his administration was, admittedly, stumbling around. Perhaps Mr Kelly believes that the 77% was sustainable, in which case we offer our condolences for his blunt head trauma.

    And what is up with this statement by Kelly?:

    Is there nothing at all to the liberal complaint? No, there is something. As the above data suggest, the media are generally more negative toward public figures (including Democratic ones) than they used to be. And while right-leaning media such as talk radio have not, as my colleague E.J. Dionne argues, produced "a media heavily biased toward conservative politics and conservative politicians," they have produced a media universe where anti-establishment right-wingers (and also anti-establishment left-wingers, such as Michael Moore) are able to bypass the establishment media and to create a far more diverse national conversation.

    That may be one of the stupidest statements Kelly has ever made. "right-leaning media such as talk radio" have not produced "a media heavily biased toward conservative politics and conservative politicians" but have produced a "media universe where anti-establishment right-wingers" can "bypass the establishment media". Hunh? All of these people are cheerleaders for the conservative Bush administration. How are they "anti-establishment"?

    And wht are we to make of Kelly's one source for media bias, Dr S. Robert Lichter? Well if you really want to see him in action, why not turn on Fox News.

    Dr. Lichter also directs the Statistical Assessment Service (STATS), a nonpartisan organization dedicated to improving the quality of news involving statistical or scientific information, and he serves on the Statistical Committee of Voter News Service. A regular commentator on the Fox News Channel and co-host of “What’s the Story?,” a nationally syndicated radio show, he has testified before Congress and served as an expert witness on media content and effects.

    I'm sure he has cured himself of all that nasty "subjectivity" that inflicts the common working journalist...at least right after he cashes that check from Fox's Roger Ailes (the evil, bald one).

    After all, he's a doctor.

    (Added: Want to know where Dr. Lichter gets his house payment? Try the Smith Richardson Foundation

    Financed by the Vicks Vaporub fortune, this foundation is estimated to have assets of about $250 million. Became active in supporting conservative caues in 1973 when R. Randolph Richardson became president. Funded the early "supply-side" books of Jude Wanniski and George Gilder. The Richardsons are estimated by Forbes to have a net worth of $870 million, making them one of the country's richest families.

    Sounds pretty "non-partisan" to me....

    (Added: See above for more on Dr Lichter)














    posted by tbogg at 12:09 PM

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