...and don't forget your Ranger Ridge™ Decoder Rings too.

Lucky-to-have-a-job Tom Ridge has some handy tips for your Surviving Dubya's Reign of Error goodie bag.

Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge on Wednesday unveiled a national campaign to advise families on what they can do to protect themselves against terrorism, urging vigilance because terrorists “seek to turn our neighborhoods into battlefields.”

“TERRORISTS FORCE us to make a choice. We can be afraid, or we can be ready,” Ridge said in a speech in Cincinnati, a city he hailed as a model for how it has prepared for terrorist attacks.

Dubbed the Ready Campaign, it will include television ads advising Americans how to prepare for the worst. The ads don’t have a single catch phrase, although most of them include the words, “Be ready” and “Arm yourself with information.”

Other phrases to be used include:

"Whoops! We misunderestimated them...again"

"Are you ready for the Rapture?"

"But Condi said she didn't think they would do that"

"Laura has the car keys. Get off of the road...NOW!"

"It wouldn't hurt to buy a share of Halliburton, just in case, y'know."

and

"Stock up on plenty of mixers. You never know when Jenna will drop by"