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  • Sunday, July 08, 2007

     

    Releasing the media dogs. Or the media bees. Or the media dogs with media bees in their mouth and when they bark, they shoot media bees at you.

    Doug Ross (you know: the Doug Ross, Doug Ross? Doug Ross? Oh, fuck it...) anyway, Doug Ross thinks that the media is being particularly unfair to Fred Thompson by scrutinizing his record just in case he runs for President.

    Ed Morrissey says that "it's easy to tell when a candidate has the potential to do well in a campaign -- the opposition starts throwing mud as early as possible."

    Well, the public relations arm of the Democratic National Committee -- better known as the mainstream media -- has begun its anti-Fred Thompson campaign. Someone at high levels is worried, because the effort seems broad and well-coordinated.
    Doug goes on to list articles linking Fred to accepting money to convince DC to let abortion doctors throw babies in woodchippers before John Roberts and his wife can get their hands on them, about Fred's Trophy Wife Who Might Be A Lawyer Or Maybe She Just Worked At A Law Firm and Nobody Seems To Know, and how Fred worked with Nixon to sandbag John Dean even though Nixon thought Fred was a lazy shiftless cracker dumbfuck.

    It seems unfair to Fred Thompson to look into these things since he actually hasn't announced that he is running and he's still being all coy and shit. They should have waited until after he announced and then he could have used that line about "buzzing flies" and everyone would have laughed and laughed and thought him quite authentic in a whittlin' on the porch kind of way, and then he could have sat back on his porch, loosened up his braces, and had a tall glass of lemonade with Jeri Sue and the youngun's while watching the sun go down on the Chigger Festival.

    In the meantime, the press should be working non-stop on the John Edwards hair-beat, Obama's terrorist pre-school, and Hillary's lesbian love affair with Vince Foster.

    You know - things real Americans care about.

    As a bonus, the New York Post from June 1 has the best lead to a Fred and Jeri story.
    Gruff, graying Republican Fred Thompson has a proven track record of tapping into a younger generation - starting with his wife.

    Don't anybody tell Joel Gandelman or we'll have to talk him down from the roof.


     

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