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  • Thursday, July 14, 2005

     

    One stop shopping for yoostabee Democrats

    Stumbling about the internets Roy discovers Donklephant (Yes. The name is that bad) which lays claim to centrism but comes across more like a gay bar for guys who haven't come out yet (nervous glances, forced smiles, frantic lip licking..."It's my first time here since the party left me. Can I buy you a Zima?") Unsurprisingly we find limp noodle and C-minus Bruce-Chatwin-wannabe Michael Totten making himself a nest there and fluffing up his worldview feathers:

    The minute regime-change in Iraq was placed on the table the political center imploded. It just couldn’t hold. Perhaps that’s natural when we’re not actively under attack in real time. But I’ve felt ill at ease since it happened. In The Art of War Sun Tzu said, when describing ways to defeat an enemy: “When he is united, divide him.” We have become divided, and we’ve become divided in war time. Al Qaeda did not do this to us. We did this to ourselves.

    Ah yes. Sun Tzu's Art of War, the bible of the 101st Fighting Keyboarders and other Stratego commandos. We really need something like Godwins law to be invoked whenever a Tom Clancy-adrenalized weekend paintball-warrior invokes the sainted Tzu in an effort to fortify their barcalounger military strategies for How Wars Should Be Fought By Other People Who Are Preferably Poorer and Less Educated.

    Maybe we could award them a medal (the Croix du Poltronnerie) for their efforts and sacrifices in thumbing through dogeared copies of The Art of War, risking treacherous papercuts and highly toxic highlighter poisoning. For those who also invoke Victor Davis Cialis-Induced-Four-Hour-Erections Hanson, we can award it with clusterfucks. One for each weary more-in-sorrow-than-anger shoulder.


     

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