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Wednesday, October 15, 2003
Easier than wearing an orange jumpsuit and picking up trash along A1A with Rush...
As part of an agreement that I just made up with Blogger, I now present a Public Service Announcement from Demogogue:
Given the Bush administration's penchant for ironic program titles (e.g. the Healthy Forests Initiative, the Clear Skies Initiative, and the grandaddy of them all--Compassionate Conservatism) we were hoping for something equally Orwellian for its new endangered species proposal. The Washington Post describes the new policy like this:
The Bush administration is proposing far-reaching changes to conservation policies that would allow hunters, circuses and the pet industry to kill, capture and import animals on the brink of extinction in other countries.
Giving Americans access to endangered animals, officials said, would feed the gigantic U.S. demand for live animals, skins, parts and trophies, and generate profits that would allow poor nations to pay for conservation of the remaining animals and their habitat.
This and other proposals that pursue conservation through trade would, for example, open the door for American trophy hunters to kill the endangered straight-horned markhor in Pakistan; license the pet industry to import the blue fronted Amazon parrot from Argentina; permit the capture of endangered Asian elephants for U.S. circuses and zoos; and partially resume the trade in African ivory.
As you can see, this is in keeping with Bush's belief that (in the paraphrased words of the Daily Show's Ed Helms) "to save something, you have to kill part of it."
We're disappointed to say that, so far at least, administration spinners haven't come up with a name to turn this particular environmental frown upside down. That, dear readers, is where you come in. We invite you to enter Demagogue's first (but certainly not last) Mock W. Contest. The rules are simple:
1. Come up with a suitably humorous name for the endangered species proposal. We encourage the use of irony, puns, Bushisms, and even the odd non sequitur.
I'm leaning towards The "Bambi's Mother Had It Coming" Herd Thinning Initiative and Teeny Penis Act.
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