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Friday, March 07, 2003
Advertising to ourselves...
NewsMax, which is an online news-service for the profoundly retarded, still has their skid-marked, stretched-out Fruit of the Looms in a twist over France not rolling over like a rolled-up, paper-smacked Tony Blair. Never mind that Germany, China, and Russia also oppose the war, they've got France in their sights and their gonna take her down.
As the war on terrorism heats up, now is the time for all patriotic Americans to show their support for our President and our country.
That is why NewsMax is launching our national "Boycott Cowardly France Campaign". With your help, we can reach millions.
If Paris wants to keep profiting from Saddam Hussein, Americans should just say no to French goods.
Boycott all things French: their gooey cheeses, their overpriced wines, their rip-off Perrier and Evian water, their crummy automobiles...
And most of all we will be boycotting their white flags. As President Bush said, we shall not surrender to evil and terrorists.
Please take a moment now and stand up for our country, our boys in uniform, and all who oppose terrorism by supporting our "Boycott Cowardly France Campaign".
NewsMax plans a nationwide ad campaign to encourage Americans to boycott France. You can help us. Please send what you can afford $50, $20, even $10. It will send France a message they will never forget.
Which you can send to their PO Box, because these guys obviously work out of a trailer. Here's what your money will do:
NewsMax plans to take out newspaper ads, internet ads, and if funds allow, radio and TV commercials to encourage Americans to boycott French goods, products, travel and services.
This will send a wake up call to the Paris elitists – betray America and the Western alliance at your own cost!
NewsMax has an ambitious program to reach millions of Americans – if contributions allow – for ads in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and major papers across the country.
This will not only inform millions of Americans, but send a wake up call to France, and make them reluctant to obstruct America, Britain and other allies.
We believe France, by not making a united front against terrorism, has put America at risk to terrorism. They have also weakened Western resolve as American troops are on the line in the sands of the mid East.(sic)
Your contributions can make a difference. NewsMax has done these informational campaign to great effect during the Elian Controversy and Election Crisis of 2000. We reached millions in those campaign with full pages ads in the NY Times and TV commercials on Fox News and elsewhere.
Just so you're clear here...the kind of people who watch Fox News(sic) should send money to NewsMax so that they can advertise on...Fox News(sic) to reach the kind of people who watch Fox News(sic).
But wait...there's more. Check out the great premiums you can receive with your "contribution":
Contribute $50 or more and receive a FREE “Home of the Brave Land of the Free” t-shirt - a value of $25
Contribute $100 or more get a FREE copy of the coffee table book “The Great Greatest Speeches of Ronald Reagan” - a $40 value with shipping
Contribute $250 or more and get a FREE edition of “Resolve” - the official portrait of President George Bush framed with his most resolute quotation.
"His most resolute quotation"?
Was last night's "Show your cards" more resoluter?
Personally I take solace in the fact the every dollar sqaundered over at NewsMax is one less dollar going towards ammunition and Toby Keith CD's.
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