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  • Tuesday, December 06, 2005

     

    So, I'm all, "c'mon man". And he's all, "bring it on dude". And I'm all, "first shot man, take it, c'mon..."

    No longer the soldier but ever the eternal warrior, Mackubin Owens (no, not the kid from Home Alone) does a total throwdown with Lincoln Chaffe and makes him his bitch:

    Chafee is a disgrace. In February 2002, I was invited to give some remarks at the North Kingstown Republican Town Committee's Annual Lincoln Day Dinner. This is a big event each year and all of the Rhode Island Republicans are there. The title of my speech that night was "Abraham Lincoln, the American Founding, and the Principles of the Republican Party," which I think at some point was published on NRO. In any event, Chafee was there and sitting at a table right in front of the podium. When I reached the penultimate paragraph of my speech, I looked right at him and said:

    "As the country music philosopher, Aaron Tippin, said in a song a few years back, "you've got to stand for something, or you'll fall for anything." Republicans have traditionally stood for limited government to protect equal rights. If the Party of Lincoln ever abandons its fealty to the principles of the Declaration, it will become little more than a pale imitation of the redistributionist Democratic Party. And Republicans can never hope to match the Democrats in offering a government solution for every problem, real or imagined."

    Chafee's face turned absolutely scarlet. I heard from a party guy later that evening that Chafee was livid. I was elated.


    ...and then he got one of those four-hour erections that all the kids are talking about. Like molybdenum...but ribbed for her pleasure.

    And remember the First Rule of Conservative Fight Club: Not in the face!


     

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