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  • Wednesday, December 03, 2003

     

    Possibly he was startled by the man hands....

    Ed Koch. My hero.

    The blonde in the black micro-mini, cocktail thin, was ANN COULTER, the conservative author. When we saw her at the American Songbook gala at Lincoln Center on Monday night, we asked her about her new book. She told us it was about "liberals." The tone she brought to that one word was one you might use after months of living in a deeply carpeted apartment with a dog that cannot be house-trained. "Top secret, they're no good," Ms. Coulter said. "That's the seminal insight of the book."

    She was reluctant to give away the title, so she shared one that didn't make the cut. "My title, much more vicious and vindictive, was "Enemies List: The Coulter Collection."

    A few words about our own oeuvre to her date, JONATHAN LEDECKY, who must be an excellent audience since he said barely a word: "Have you ever read their Boldface Names?" Ms. Coulter asked. "Yeah, second page of Metro. It's always about those people who you've never heard of, who no one has ever heard of."


    The emphasized part is the set-up. Here comes the punchline:

    The dinner bell rang. In the foyer, Ms. Coulter passed ED KOCH. He looked content and smiling in his forest green blazer. It was she who interrupted his moment, extending a thin hand. He seemed to have no idea who she was. She fumed, extravagantly, and told him to look her up online.

    [rimshot]

    Didn't your day just get a little brighter?

    (Thanks to Dave in Texas)


     

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