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Tuesday, October 07, 2003
"Never mind the bathingsuits...will the contestants be wearing socks?"
The Metatarsal Masticator, Dick Morris has landed himself a gig at a beauty pageant:
Politics makes strange bedfellows, but it makes even stranger drinking buddies. Witness the Rheingold Brewing Co., which has hired Dick Morris—the political guru behind Bill Clinton's two presidential victories—to be a "campaign advisor" to the six finalists in its Miss Rheingold bartender beauty contest. "We thought it would be a good fit," says Rheingold CEO Tom Bendheim, who wouldn't disclose Morris's fee. "We don't take ourselves too seriously."
There's no risk of that, not with Morris rattling off quips like "This is the first time I've worked with a candidate who admits to being in a beauty contest." Morris, whose other clients are mostly foreign politicians, no longer does domestic consulting ("I'm on Fox News all the time and want to be free to dump on everyone"), but he made an exception for the beauties. "I'll show them how to shake hands with one arm while opening a Rheingold with the other." Ba-dum-bum!
Only Dick Morris could give sleaze a bad name....
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