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Slightly Used Snark

  • 09/01/2002 - 10/01/2002
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  • Thursday, October 31, 2002

     

    Sybil! The Musical starring Peggy Noonan.

    Peggy Noonan who admitted last week that she only met Paul Wellstone once, assumes she can speak for him.

    My friends, I miss you and send you love.

    That memorial rally was . . . something. I watched it from where I am, in the place beyond. It's wonderful here. You'll be amazed at what I think is one of the best parts. Two words: No politics. I love it. Who knew?

    But we have to talk. I know what you were trying to do the other night, or what you sort of meant to do. But it was bad.

    Peggy, who wrote the laughable The Case Against Hillary Clinton which contained a lengthy "dream sequence" with Hillary addressing the Hollywood moguls about 'responsibility', loves to leap into other people's lives and live them for them while having them speak in her voice of her concerns. I'm sure she gets a vicarious thrill out of being the Pope or Hillary Clinton or, now, Paul Wellstone, but it would lend a bit ( a very small bit) of verisimilitude if she actually knew some of these people instead of indulging herself in that Blanche DuBois writing style of hers where she has "always depended on the lifestyles of strangers".

    Next week... Peggy channels Jam Master Jay because she once saw him on Saturday Night Live. Peace out, yo.





    posted by tbogg at 9:36 PM

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    Wow

    Great piece of work by James Capozzola at Rittenhouse on the Harvey Pitt situation. This lays it out better than any other writing I've seen on the situation.


    posted by tbogg at 9:18 PM

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    ...and starring Michael Kelly as Foghorn Leghorn.

    I've put off addressing Michael Kelly's latest Return of the 'Chicken Hawks' because, quite frankly, he makes me tired. Discussing a Kelly column is like housebreaking a puppy: you begin to wonder if he will ever learn. But since I couldn't let his latest pass unremarked...here goes.

    He starts out on the somewhat on the right foot:

    The general trump-it-all insult that the antiwar crowd aims at the pro-war crowd these days is a neat little portmanteau term that manages to impute, at once, cowardice, ignorance, selfishness, bloodlust (as long as the blood spills from others' veins) and hypocrisy: "chicken hawk."

    The generally accepted definition of the term, which dates at least to 1988, describes "chicken hawks" as public persons, generally male, who advocate war but who declined a significant opportunity to serve in uniform during wartime.

    But then, like a hound that picks up the wrong scent, he goes astray.

    So it is with "chicken hawk." Its power lies in the simplicity that comes with being completely wrong. The central implication here is that only men who have professionally endured war have the moral standing and the experiential authority to advocate war. That is, in this country at least, a radical and ahistorical view. The Founders, who knew quite well the dangers of a military class supreme, were clear in their conviction that the judgment of professional warmakers must be subordinated to the command of ignorant amateurs -- civilian leaders who were in turn subordinated to the command of civilian voters. Such has given us the leadership in war of such notable "chicken hawks" as Abraham Lincoln and Franklin Delano Roosevelt.

    Further, the inescapable logic of "chicken hawk"-calling is that only military men have standing to pronounce in any way on war -- to advocate it or to advocate against it. The decision not to go to war involves exactly the same issues of experiential and moral authority as does the decision to go to war. If a past of soldiering is required for one, it is required for the other. Chicken doves have no more standing than "chicken hawks." We must leave all the decisions to the generals and the veterans

    Bzzzztttt! Wrong.

    Kelly states what a chickenhawk is, and then runs away from it towards an irrelevant strawman argument regarding civilians vs military pumping up and then running a war. As he himself said, chickenhawks are "... public persons, generally male, who advocate war but who declined a significant opportunity to serve in uniform during wartime." Examples of this are: Dick Cheney who used every deferment he could get his hands on (even when flunking out of school), including marrying Lynne (desperate times call for desperate measures) to avoid the war because he had "other priorities". George W. Bush who had his Congressman dad get him into the National Guard where he checked a box on his papers indicating that he was not willing to go overseas...of course he then deserted, which kind of made the issue moot. We'll leave out the others who missed out on Viet Nam due to rashs, psoriasis, bad knees, and anal cysts, but you can check them out here.

    Donald Rumsfeld is not a chickenhawk. Although his service was during peacetime, it still counts. My objection to Rummy is that...he lies. Wolfowitz and Perle count as chickenhawks precisely because they hid out in academia when they could have been fighting for that Pax Americana they've got such a hard-on for. But the Mary Kate and Ashley of American Military Might see themselves as "big picture" kind of guys as opposed to "cannon fodder" kind of guys.

    These are what are meant by "chickenhawks". Apparently four paragraphs in, Kelly forgot what he was talking about, or he just reverted back to being Kelly the Obtuse again.

    Later Kelly flatters himself as an "honorary chickenhawk" because:

    I am myself not technically a "chicken hawk," as I was, thank God, a few years too young to serve during the Vietnam War and too old and too untrained to be of any military use during the next significant war, the Persian Gulf War of 1991. But I suppose I fit the spirit if not the letter of the slur. I am certainly now a hawk, and during the Vietnam years I was certainly a dove. What changed me was in fact experience of war -- but not as a soldier.

    I covered the Gulf War as a reporter, and it was this experience, later compounded by what I saw reporting in Bosnia, that convinced me of the moral imperative, sometimes, for war.

    In liberated Kuwait City, one vast crime scene, I toured the morgue one day and inspected torture and murder victims left behind by the departing Iraqis.

    Well put on the bush jacket and call me Ernie Pyle. Kelly has seen "war". He's a hardened war correspondent who's smoked too many cigarettes, drank too much whiskey, and seen too much death... not to mention the hotels where you can barely plug in your laptop because war is hell, don't you know.

    The Gulf War...Bosnia...two of the Pentagon's most orchestrated "wins" when it came to the media. After the debacle of Viet Nam where the Pentagon blamed it's shortcomings on the 'media', among others, the General's got smarter. No more reporters in the field until after the story was practically typed up for them. Film clips for CNN. Daily content-free press briefings. This is what Kelly saw. He was the meat inspector that saw the sausage...but not what went into it, and that was just fine with him, now show me to the open bar.

    When you get down to it, Kelly is just soft and easy to manipulate, a stenographer for the government, who wants us to think that he's Neil Sheehan, when he's really Professor Harold Hill selling snake-oil and verbs to the little boys and girls who want to have a war for the other kids to play in.

    What fun! Praise the lord and pass the ammunition, Mikey.









    posted by tbogg at 8:48 PM

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    Dave? I'm sorry I can't let you log off right now....

    When computers come alive.


    posted by tbogg at 7:45 PM

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    Why does my taco taste like cheap perfume and cigarette butts?

    Tonya Sauce.


    PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) - Tonya Hot Sauce features an unflattering caricature of disgraced figure skater Tonya Harding outside a dumpy trailer, cigarette in mouth, ice skates in one hand and a hubcap in the other.

    "Not for the weak-kneed," reads the label. "Guaranteed to assault your taste buds. It's a lead-pipe cinch you'll love it."

    John Farmer and his PDX Hot Lix company brought out the product a couple of years ago and says it's all in fun.

    "I just read the papers and think up ideas for a product," the airline employee said. "Tonya just keeps on giving."

    Harding doesn't think it's very funny and neither does her lawyer. Made in Oregon stores pulled the product from the shelves after getting a legal letter advising them not sell the sauce.

    Here's the best part:

    Harding's San Diego attorney William Markham said the spoof defames Harding and unfairly conjures up memories of what he says are disturbing and misunderstood events that foiled her dreams of an Olympic championship.

    The letter threatens a lawsuit for misappropriating Harding's image.

    "Tonya has been punished more than enough for what she did or didn't do," Markham said.

    "(The label) portrays her as cigarette-smoking, bubble-gum-chewing trailer trash and that's not who Tonya Harding is," he said. "She is a world-class athlete who trained for years on end, and in a horrible episode lost all that."

    Looks like Tonya has found not only a good lawyer but a soulmate...








    posted by tbogg at 7:41 PM

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    Apparently the economy is worse than I thought...

    It's been a really interesting evening. After dinner I settled down at the computer to look for things to post on the blog. I was just finishing an article on Harvey Pitt and his failure to let the other members of the SEC board know about recent appointee William Webster's membership on an audit committee that faces fraud charges. With this in mind, and the idea that investor confidence would surely be shaken, I was surprised to hear a knock at the door. Upon opening the door I found two oddly dressed children standing on the porch with open bags and expectant looks on their faces. Needless to say, it immediately occurred to me that they were going door-to-door begging for food. I thought to myself, has the economy collapsed this much? Is this what we have come to? When I asked them if they were hungry, they glanced at each other with quizzical looks that I took to mean "duh...of course we’re hungry”. Thinking that they looked like they could use a hot meal, I asked if they would like to come in and have, maybe a grilled-cheese sandwich. At this point they nervously glanced toward the street and I saw what I assumed to be their parents standing on the sidewalk with anxious smiles looking toward us. How incredibly sad! These people had been reduced to taking their children out on a cold October night to beg for food!

    Have we become a third world country? Is this what the Bush administration has brought upon us?

    Noting the awkwardness of feeding only the children and not the parents I decided the best course of action was to give them canned goods because who knew when they would get a chance to eat this evening and I couldn’t count on them still having refrigeration, much less a home to return to. After dropping several cans of corn and a can of asparagus into the young girls bag, I decided to give the boy a special treat hoping that he would understand the type of world he would have to make his way in. I dropped into his bag a slightly dog-eared copy of Adam Smith’s The Wealth of Nations. Although I felt a copy of Atlas Shrugged would be more informative for the young lad, I didn't have an extra copy to spare at the time.

    Apparently the children were shocked at my generosity for they were speechless. I told them “Good night” and yelled, “Good luck” to their waiting parents and started to close the door. As they walked back toward their parents I heard the boy say an amazing thing. He looked in his bag at the precious book I had given him and muttered to his sister one simple word: “Asswipe”.

    Now my heart was truly broken for I realized that these people were so poor that they couldn’t even afford toilet paper and the book would soon become a poor substitute. Poor Adam Smith…he never meant for his words to be treated in such a way, but these are the times we live in….


    posted by tbogg at 7:31 PM

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    Washed-up pop tart marries second-tier boy band member...and gets midget stripper...hilarious hijinks follow

    Ahhh. America. Where fame is as fleeting as a George Bush deep thought...

    Jessica Simpson gets married to 98 Degrees singer Nick Lachey and, well, to quote from the article:

    she enjoyed a bachelorette party in Austin, Texas, that was apparently pretty wild, thanks to a male midget stripper who calls himself "Napoleon."

    The knee-high Napoleon, who also stars in adult movies like "Freak Show" and "Perverted Stories 3: Tropical Perversions" claims that he didn't "officially" touch Simpson during his routine but admits he did brush up against her at one point

    ...at which point I got all squicked out and quit cutting and pasting.

    For those who don't know who Jessica Simpson and 98 Degree's Nick Lachey are...don't worry. You probably don't remember the guys in Color Me Badd either unless, of course, one of them may have bagged your groceries last weekend...

    (This is a 'badd" sign...the Official Color Me Badd website is suprisingly unavailable, which is even worse if you're still waiting on your Color Me Badd Dreamdate with either the "pouty" one, the "baby-faced" one, the "edgy" one, or the "black" one.)


    posted by tbogg at 1:13 PM

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    Will that be First Class, Business Class, Coach, or Hooligan....?

    British Airways is to issue soccer-style yellow cards to irate passengers on the ground, it has been announced.

    The airline is the first in the world to operate the scheme after a successful pilot scheme for air rage.

    A British Airways spokeswoman said: "The scheme is something we have done in the air when a passenger's behaviour is becoming threatening or abusive.

    "We are now extending the scheme to the ground to protect our check-in and airport staff."

    The cards will be given to any passenger who is disruptive or abusive.


    posted by tbogg at 12:57 PM

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    That's just Jesse in his sheet again, reliving the good ole days...

    N.C. Capitol to be inspected for ghosts

    RALEIGH, N.C. — They haven't quite called in the ghost-busters, but the state has given the OK for a paranormal screening of the old state Capitol.

    Staffers at the Capitol say they have heard floorboards creak with invisible footsteps, keys jangle and doors squeak open and shut

    If nothing else, maybe the ghostbusters can raise Bob Dole's dick from dead....


    posted by tbogg at 12:54 PM

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    Mfinley

    I like his take on Wellstone entropy

    I believe there is enough Wellstone memorial outrage to keep the rightwing busy until late next Tuesday night when they can start their ritual complaining of "voter fraud" involving dead people, 'mesicans', and any other person whose skin pigmentation is a darker shade of pale....


    posted by tbogg at 12:44 PM

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    If it happened last year, can we still call it a 'youthful indiscretion'?

    MWO nails the easily shocked Republicans...

    GOP, RIGHT-WING MEDIA
    HONOR BOOING,
    BOOERS OF SENATOR


    Rush Limbaugh Cheers Man Who Led The Jeers

    Blame Object Of Booing For Arrogance, Disdain

    Standing Up For Good Manners And Family Values

    Some of the people in the huge arena, packed with 20,000 mourners, were angry when they caught a glimpse of the Senator.

    Disgust overcame them. They booed lustily, some of them shouting, "We don't want you here," and some shouting epithets.

    And for the next few days, the GOP and right-wing pundits had a field day -- supporting the booers, saying that they spoke the truth, and that the Senator deserved all that was dished out and more.

    Rush Limbaugh led the right-wing boo fest by having the man who led the booing on his program as Dittohead Hero Of The Day.

    Newsmax, Matt Drudge Neal Boortz, Kathleen Parker, and GOP radio talk show hosts nationwide cheered on the booers, and attacked the Senator they booed.

    What's wrong with this picture? Well nothing -- because the Senator being booed wasn't Trent Lott -- it was Hillary Clinton, about a year ago, at Madison Square Garden. at a huge concert honoring the heroic policemen and firefighters who gave their lives on September 11, 2001.

    It seems that some of those in the audience thought that this upbeat yet solemn occasion should -- gasp! -- be an occasion for politics.

    Hear! hear! said Rush and his clones, who booed right along with them.

    So you see, folks, it's not the boos that matter to these right-wing thugs. It's who's getting booed. If it's Trent Lott being booed, it's a travesty. If it's Hillary Clinton being booed, it's an act of patriotism.

    These people have no shame, no principles, no morals. They just want power. And will say anything, do anything to get it.

    We can expect an apology from Rush the same day the National Thoroughbred Association names him Jockey of the Year.


    posted by tbogg at 11:03 AM

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    Contrast and compare:

    According to Republicans, this guy is too old to run for office.

    But they have no problem with is guy serving.

    or this guy.

    Oh great. Now my blog has that "old man smell"......



    posted by tbogg at 10:28 AM

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    Gene's you don't want to get into.....

    This is from a few days ago, but it has a few lovely nuggets in it:

    There is, as well, a family resemblance between these two brothers, as there is with the father, but in some ways they could not be more different. If President Bush is jaunty and happy, Jeb Bush is apt to be guarded and coiled.

    Here in Vero Beach, Governor Bush was in the midst of a conversation when an elderly voter tugged impatiently at his sleeve, demanding a moment of his time. It was hardly an uncommon encounter for this state, but the governor reacted with a flash of irritation.

    "I'll be out in a second," he said. "Do you know what a second is?" Mr. Bush proceeded to offer a definition ("A second is——") though he caught himself and stopped.

    ...and this:

    Analysts say that over all, Mr. Bush clearly benefits from the presence of this brother in the White House. Yet no less a person than Barbara Bush offered a reminder the other day of both ways the Bush name cuts in this state.

    "Before I leave, do vote," she said, exhorting elderly voters to turn out. "We're the most disgraceful state." She paused, her face frozen, as she realized what she had said. "Not state! Country! We do not vote."

    Jeb Bush put his hand in his head and slumped in his chair.

    Thin-skinned and stupid. It's the Bush family motto.






    posted by tbogg at 10:10 AM

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    Maybe Harvey Pitt will reopen the investigation....bawahahahahahaha...no really....bwahahahahaha

    Board was told of risks before Bush stock sale

    One week before George W. Bush's now-famous sale of stock in Harken Energy Corp. in 1990, Harken was warned by its lawyers that Bush and other members of the troubled oil company's board faced possible insider trading risks if they unloaded their shares.

    The warning from Harken's lawyers came in a legal memorandum whose existence has been little noted until now, despite the many years of scrutiny of the Bush transaction. The memo was not received by the Securities and Exchange Commission until the day after the agency decided not to bring insider-trading charges against Bush, documents show.

    The memo, a copy of which was obtained by the Globe, does not say directly whether Bush would face legal problems if he sold his stock. But it does lay out the potential for insider-trading violations by Bush and other members of the Harken board, and its existence raises questions about how thoroughly the SEC investigated Bush's unloading of $848,000 of his Harken stake to a buyer whose name has not been made public.

    The SEC cleared Bush after looking into whether he had insider knowledge of an upcoming quarterly loss at Harken. But the SEC investigation apparently never examined a key issue raised in the memo: whether Bush's insider knowledge of a plan to rescue the company from financial collapse by spinning off two troubled units was a factor in his decision to sell.



    posted by tbogg at 9:12 AM

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    Mi nombre es Jeb! My que la hija es una puta de la crack...

    Gov. Jeb Bush Campaigns in Spanish

    Cómo usted dice "bloated corrupt political hack"?

    "bloated el corte político corrupto"

    Gracias!

    (I think I broke dictionary.com on that one...)




    posted by tbogg at 8:19 AM

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    I think I lied. Maybe I should have myself investigated...

    Harvey Pitt is a real piece of work. It seems that he failed to mention to the rest of the SEC board that William Webster is involved in a little lawsuit.

    NEW YORK, Oct. 31 — Securities and Exchange Commission Chairman Harvey Pitt asked Thursday for an internal investigation of William Webster’s selection to head an accounting oversight board after the disclosure that Pitt himself withheld information that Webster headed an auditing committee for a company facing fraud charges

    Of course, it would never occur to Pitt to just admit that he misled the other board members that he withheld information. No, he needs to have an "investigation" of himself. How many more lies before President Cowardly Lyin' tosses Pitt overboard?

    Heh heh heh. Yeah. Right....


    posted by tbogg at 8:12 AM

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    Wednesday, October 30, 2002

     

    "Can I get a hand getting the bigscreen out of the rumpus room?"

    Man leaves treehouse after 12 years

    San Bruno Mountain's last treehouse resident has packed his bags and moved on.

    Besh Serdahely, the self-appointed guardian of the San Mateo County mountain's lupines, owls and mission blue butterflies, asked rangers Tuesday to help him dismantle his home of 12 years from its carefully crafted niche in a huge coastal oak

    snip

    Apart from their home, which was already built when they moved into Owl Canyon almost 12 years ago, the pair acted as unofficial caretakers, removing invasive plant species and keeping trails clear. They were charming, educational hosts to school groups who would stop by to visit with them during field trips to the park.

    Mr. Serdahely said he was looking forward to his new carrer following Phish around the country and selling acid-soaked toothpicks.

    Oh-oh.


    posted by tbogg at 11:18 PM

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    Can you use them to pay tuition at Bob Jones U?

    Jesus dollars turning up at Maine colleges.

    WATERVILLE — Counterfeit bills with quotes from the Bible and other pro-Christian literature are being stuffed in books at public libraries throughout Maine

    Every year for the past five years, the Waterville Public Library, Colby College library and Bates College library have spent hours removing counterfeit bills with varying slogans and pictures





    posted by tbogg at 11:08 PM

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    Somebody throw Candy Crowley another hoagie, we need some damage control here...

    Looks like Ari Fleischer won't be returning Eleanor Clift's calls for for...eternity.

    He said he would change the tone in Washington and dispel the dark cloud of partisanship that clung to the Capitol. Democratic leader Tom Daschle says Bush has indeed changed the tone, but not for the better. Tom Mann, a congressional scholar at the Brookings Institution, says that relations between the White House and Congress are “the most poisonous in 30 years,” which takes us back to the days of Richard Nixon and Watergate.

    snip

    But it’s not true that Bush is a man of his word. He has shimmied and shifted in lots of areas, including Iraq, manipulating language the way Clinton did and exaggerating in the same way that he once pilloried Gore for doing. Bush says “regime change” doesn’t have to mean deposing Saddam Hussein—that the regime would be changed if Saddam disarmed. This is rhetoric worthy of Clinton, and it doesn’t mean that Bush has altered fundamentally his commitment to displace Saddam through military force.

    Even though there is no credible evidence linking the Iraqi president to the 9-11 attacks, Bush persists in suggesting on the campaign trail that Saddam might use Al Qaeda as his “forward army.” Polls show that two thirds of Americans believe Saddam was behind 9-11, a useful myth irresponsibly fed by Bush. The president said in a speech last month that Saddam is experimenting with unmanned drones capable of reaching the United States with weapons of mass destruction. When confronted with the geographical improbability of such a feat, a White House spokesman countered that the drones could be launched from ships. Unless Iraq has an aircraft carrier we don’t know about, that scenario is equally implausible

    and then, to put Bush out of his misery:

    There is hardly an issue where Bush hasn’t pulled a fast one. The rules he announced with great fanfare this week to make it easier to move generic drugs onto the market were passed by the Senate in July. Bush opposed them then; now with polls showing voters think he hasn’t done enough on domestic issues, he’s flipped.

    How does he get away with such crass duplicity? The media doesn’t want to disturb the story line. Gore was the prevaricator; Bush was intellectually challenged. So when Bush fiddles with the facts, the media doesn’t see malevolence. They see a man who’s not articulate, who doesn’t speak with lawyerly precision. And they can’t believe how believable he is.

    Alright. Who woke the media up? Not you Fineman, you just keep on sleeping....



    posted by tbogg at 11:01 PM

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    Your honor, my client would simply be lost without Subway Monkey Hour

    Things you never expect to hear in the same sentence...

    George Bush....genius grant

    Michael Jackson....NRA President

    Bud Selig...GQ Man of the Year

    Tom Greene.....Intellectual property

    Yup. Tom and Drew are finally kaput, but there is the little matter of what belongs to whom. Guess who gets The Splooze, Gee Gee Gaudette, and Garry the Superhero?


    posted by tbogg at 10:46 PM

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    Welcome to politics...we hope you enjoyed your stay...now, there's the door, you freak...

    Soon to be unemployed Jesse Ventura is very upset.

    Minnesota Gov. Jesse Ventura, upset by what he felt was a partisan tone of a memorial service to honor the late Sen. Paul Wellstone, said he will try to appoint an independent instead of a Democrat to temporarily fill Wellstone's seat.

    Ventura had said he favored a replacement from Wellstone's party, but that was before he walked out of Tuesday night's memorial service

    "I wanted to hear the sons. But Rick Kahn's, I found his so offensive to me as an Independent, or to anyone who is not necessarily going to vote for Senator Wellstone who still respects him and came to pay their respects," Ventura said. "It drove the first lady to tears."

    "I will try to find an independent," Ventura said Wednesday on a talk radio show, though he did not say who he might name.

    Ventura later backed off his statements somewhat, saying: "I haven't ruled anything out." Among the options, he said, is to appoint "a regular citizen" with no connection to politics

    So, Governor Publicity Stunt is going to go to the trouble to appoint someone for a whole two weeks to show what a rebel he is...oooooooo. Of course in about three weeks, the people of Minnesota will forget that he ever held office until they see this on TV:

    I took Navy Seal training

    I took wrestling lessons.

    I took the Governorship in Minnesota.

    Now I take Viagra.....






    posted by tbogg at 9:34 PM

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    From the lost files of Dian Fossey...

    Haz-mat suit in place, I ventured into the freeperzone to see how they are dealing with Wellstone's memorial service. Shhhhhh. Let's listen in:

    Agreed. There was demonic, genuinely rabid sickness flowing thru that arena.

    That Tommy T and Trent L went was good. That when their faces were showed on the jumbo-tron and they were massively BOOED by the audience was CRUEL. VILE. And I am SO GLAD to know that Trent had the dignity to leave. Imagine going to a MEMORIAL SERVICE, to honor and respect a fellow colleague, and being BOOED while there......HORRENDOUS! HORRENDOUS!!!!!!!!!

    This was a pathetic gathering was formed by legions from hell. I doubt most knew what was to occur there, in fact, I suspect most thought it was going to be a loving, respectful memorial service where they could all share their memories and respect. Alas-the joke was on them. And they were swept up into a McAuliffe-klintonian mission to gain advantage from a good man's death.

    The queen and king of immoral, disgusting vice reigned supreme, the newly annointed would be next senator beamed from ear to ear, the speakers distorted and drove the crowds to near hysterics with their political banter, the money bag man for the klinton's flying monkeys grinned with vile sneers, jess jackson, glistened in the spot light, hovering like a demon with power on his mind, and the crowd leaped and shouted and swooned as a demonic legion shaking the gates of hell....because all of this was being done on the tragic event of one man's death.

    One might almost think these sick people were GLAD that Paul was killed in that horrific crash.

    Was his wife mentioned, the pilots, the staffers?

    Were others mocked and jeered at, or only Trent Lott and Tommy Thompson?

    This disgraceful event was the culmination of the klintonian drive to usurp and take over the late great dem party. Their ilk reveled in the sick display, the orgasmic quality of their cheering and rock star like basking seemed to come straight from hell, imho.

    the klintons want to destroy our culture and our rule of law-it seems fitting that their appearances are taking on the quality of a staged, choreographed venue of mass cultish-like hysteria. They must have felt supreme to finally be in a place where people were not booing them....ie a major league baseball game in NY or a FReeping out on the streets.

    These people are not sad Wellstone passed away. Not by a long shot.

    In fact- I did not see mourning or grief or love or respect at this event....I saw meaness, I saw GLOATING and LOTS OF IT!

    I need to know....when Wellstone was living, and the race was being fought for the vote, was the vote considered close at the time?

    There was something going on in that arena....my guess is....everyone with a hint of decency felt the shadow of hell.

    280 posted on 10/30/2002 8:27 AM PST by Republic

    Oh well. Better ranting on Free Republic than perched on the roof, thinning out the neighborhood with a high powered rifle...



    posted by tbogg at 4:00 PM

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    One toke over the line sweet Jesus...

    Medical pot growers in California are harshing fundamentalist ass-clowns John Ashcroft and Asa Hutchinson's mellow:

    It is now a familiar scene from San Francisco to San Diego, from the Central Valley to the inner cities – federal agents raiding marijuana gardens and shutting down organizations that dispense the drug.

    One after another, under the threat of arrest or imprisonment, cannabis club operators across the state have closed their doors or stopped providing their wares to sick or dying patients.

    Barely a handful of dispensaries remain, and they are afraid.

    Federal officials stepped up their crackdown on pot collaboratives after the U.S. Supreme Court ruled last year that there is no medical necessity for growing marijuana for patients.

    Since that decision, the federal government has raided eight California cannabis clubs, including the Los Angeles Cannabis Resource Cooperative, once a major dispenser of medical marijuana in the southern part of the state.

    Drug agents say they are enforcing the federal law that prohibits the possession or distribution of dangerous narcotics

    snip

    In the meantime, patients who say they rely on marijuana to ease the effects of AIDS treatment, chemotherapy or other sicknesses are scrambling for alternatives to the increasingly rare cannabis clubs.

    They take their chances cultivating small gardens or buying marijuana from strangers.

    "I try to keep a low profile," said one AIDS patient from Ocean Beach who grows his own marijuana rather than risk dealing with a cannabis club. "I don't want to be next on their list."

    Rod Johnson, 62, is a terminal cancer patient from Chula Vista. His source for marijuana dried up when agents uprooted McWilliams' garden last month. Now he relies on friends to supply him with what he says is the only medicine that keeps up his appetite – and spirits.

    "I wasn't born and raised being a cannabis enthusiast – that was taboo. But I know how cannabis has affected my situation," Johnson said. "It makes it more difficult when Steve is not my care provider.

    "It's available," but you're not dealing "with people you can trust."

    Glaucoma patient Evan Keliher of Rancho Bernardo smokes pot every day. He used to grow plants in a cooperative garden run by McWilliams, but shied away from that after being hassled by police.

    "I buy it on the street," said Keliher, 71. "You just have to know who to see and where."

    Would it be irresponsible to wish colon cancer on Ashcroft & Hutchinson? It would be irresponsible not----- oh my, that's a bad thought, and we mustn't have those.....



    posted by tbogg at 12:44 PM

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    No more peeing on walls, dancing in the streets, and flashing your boobs....

    The French Quarter is getting a makeover.

    NEW ORLEANS -- Child tap dancers, street mimes, panhandlers and con men -- they have become fixtures in New Orleans' rollicking French Quarter. But now they are getting the bum's rush.

    New Orleans is cracking down on street performers and minor crime in its most famous neighborhood, pleasing many of the roughly 4,000 people who live there.

    They say the French Quarter's reputation as a playground of sin has gotten out of hand, overshadowing its fine restaurants and 19th-century architecture.

    "Upscale and downscale co-exist here, and that's fine. That's the basic character of New Orleans," said Louis Sahuc, a gallery owner and French Quarter resident. "But sleaze and dirt and litter and hustling is not part of New Orleans. We're very permissive in a lot of ways, but permissiveness does not extend to outright abuse by people who want to rip you off."

    This comes just in time as the New Orleans Tourist Bureau rolls out their newest ad campaign:

    The French Quarter! Just like Salt Lake City..but without the color and glitz!


    posted by tbogg at 12:18 PM

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    Wise men still seek him.....but Darrell, you only get one week

    The Men Who Like To Hang Out With Boys (no...not the priests...) seem to have a problem with Darrell Lambert.

    PORT ORCHARD, Wash. (AP) - Eagle Scout Darrell Lambert has earned 37 merit badges, worked more than 1,000 hours of community service and helps lead a Boy Scout troop in his hometown.

    But the 19-year-old has another distinction that may lead to his removal from the Boy Scouts: He's an atheist.

    Last week, Lambert was given roughly a week by the Boy Scouts' regional executive to declare belief in a supreme being and comply with Boy Scout policy, or quit the Scouts. The official and Lambert were to talk again this week regarding Lambert's answer, although a definite date hadn't been set by Tuesday.

    "We've asked him to search his heart, to confer with family members, to give this great thought," Brad Farmer, the Scout executive of the Chief Seattle Council of the Boy Scouts, told The Sun of Bremerton. "If he says he's an avowed atheist, he does not meet the standards of membership."

    Bummer. That Hypocrisy badge was sooooooo within reach. But there's hope:

    On membership applications, Boy Scouts and adult leaders must say they recognize some higher power, not necessarily religious. "Mother Nature would be acceptable," Farmer said.

    What if Darrell accepted Brad Farmer as a higher power, without mentioning that he's a kerchief-wearing, stick-rubbing, tent-pitching, got-a-little-amount-of-power-in-my-repressed-pathetic-life-and-I'm-gonna-use-it, dickhead?

    I think we could all live with that.


    posted by tbogg at 12:08 PM

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    Grasping for Gay-baiting straws.....

    Sullivan. Again.

    MORE DEMOCRATIC GAY-BAITING: This time in Hawaii. Somehow, I'm not surprised any more.

    First the link takes you to blogger Cornfield Commentary, which then takes you to The Hawaii Reporter for this:

    Yesterday, Hawaii Reporter talked to a handful of people outside the Republican Party who had direct knowledge of a new secret whispering campaign against Republican Gubernatorial Candidate Linda Lingle. Apparently a woman claiming to be the former lover of Lingle is calling targeted Republicans as a part of a smear campaign against Lingle. Lingle says she is not gay and in fact has been married twice.

    Lingle supporters says smear mongers are hoping to distract voters from the real issues like the fact that the state has hit rock bottom in almost every category -– education, business, social problems, importation of drugs, domestic violence, theft -- because of poor political leadership.

    Democrats tried this same smear in 1998 against Lingle when she ran for governor against incumbent Benjamin Cayetano and against some of their own candidates in years prior who weren't the "chosen" party candidates, including a Democrat candidate for mayor and a Democrat candidate for governor. Lingle addresses this rumor on her Web site, http://www.LindaLingle.com, and has discussed it openly at forums.

    Since the Hawaii Reporter won't clue us into who is doing this whispering

    Hawaii Reporter talked to a handful of people outside the Republican Party who had direct knowledge of a new secret whispering campaign against Republican Gubernatorial Candidate Linda Lingle.

    ...we have to ask: Who or what is the Hawaii Reporter? (A) Some major island daily? (b)An incisive non-partisan look at Hawaii politics, or (C) an on-line shill for Hawaii's minor party?

    Lets look at some of their other headlines and leads:

    Honolulu Advertiser Endorsement No Surprise
    Editors, Reporters Will Still Embrace Democrat Ideals, Politics Over Lingle
    By Malia Zimmerman, 10/30/2002 1:47:36 AM
    Many people were surprised that the Honolulu Advertiser, the unofficial propaganda piece for the state Democrat party, yesterday announced its endorsement of Republican Gubernatorial Candidate Linda Lingle over Democrat Lt. Gov. Mazie Hirono.


    Remember to Vote - No Excuses

    By Union News Network, 10/30/2002 1:46:05 AM
    Remember to vote. ... People are risking their lives overseas so that all of us can pull the curtain behind us. There is no excuse for not voting. The debate between candidates is the healthy sign of democracy, but only if you vote.

    Mazie and Matt are nice people that, unfortunately represent less confidence you have in government and less earning power in your wallet. This town needs to be "kick started" so that we can recover financially; have better schools, more police patroling the streets ... but mainly we need to restore faith in our government leaders.

    We like Linda Lingle because she will help business and fill the hotel rooms and that keeps us working. She always helped Local 5 on Maui during organizing campaigns or as a facilitator during labor disputes. We know ... we were there.

    There has been just too much corruption by the Democrats and a balanced government in Hawaii will keep everybody a little more honest. If we give Lingle a chance as governor, the majority of the Legislature will still probably be Democrats ... so things will be balanced.

    I'm going to have to guess (C). But only because of some whispering I hear from sources I can't divulge.....











    posted by tbogg at 10:11 AM

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    Love notes from President Thin Skin....

    I got this from over at Eschaton.

    Wish I had the money to bid on it......


    posted by tbogg at 8:05 AM

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    For those looking for the contest...

    ......"Viking Penguin has made the winning but undisclosed seven-figure bid in the auction for George Bush confidant Karen Hughes's White House memoirs. The book, an account of Hughes's 'unique relationship with the president' and her life as a working mother and wife, is tentatively titled '10 Minutes from Normal.'"


    Since Karen is so busy hopscotching around the country bailing out faltering candidates, I thought we could, at least, help her with the title of her book about her "unique" relationship with GW Bush. Previously discarded titles include:


    -Hold Still While I Change Your Diaper!


    -You Can Come Out From Under The Desk Now...and Other Things I Told The President


    -It's "Nu-cle-ar" ...Now Say it. "Nu-cle-ar". C'mon. You Can Do It.


    -Speeches, Photo-Ops, and Screwing Laura: My Days and Nights With The President


    Submit your suggestions today before all the good names are taken. Suggestions to be posted Friday night!!!!

    Email me





    posted by tbogg at 7:58 AM

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    Tuesday, October 29, 2002

     

    Islamophobe Andy and the talented Mr Putin

    "This is war guys." Andrew Sullivan reminds us, as hypothetical world leaders keep making horrible decisions.:

    IN DEFENSE OF PUTIN: Maybe he'll stop prevaricating on the Security Council now, especially since the weapons inspectors have put themselves behind the U.S-U.K. position. The loss of civilian life in the Moscow theater is, of course, a terrible event. But Putin's gut instinct - to fight the terrorists with all the means at his disposal - was and is the right one. We don't yet know the type of gas used, and clearly something went badly, badly wrong. But the idea of using such a device to stun and paralyze hostage-taking terrorists is not a crazy one. This is a war, guys. Above all, it must be stressed that the people really responsible for these civilian deaths are the terrorists themselves. And their global reach is widening. We've had outbreaks of terrorism in Bali, Jordan, Moscow and Washington, D.C. in the last couple of weeks. Every single one has some kind of Islamic extremist connection. Although the nuances differ, and the groups may not be identical and the specific motives diverse, Islamism is the thread that connects them all.

    ...and if 117 people have to die to make Andy feel all safe and snuggly for a few minutes, well, war is hell, get over it, and let the bombing begin. I think Jeff Danziger disagrees. Where many see tragedy and negligence, Andy sees an opportunity to push for more death to Muslims. It must be nice to have the fires of religious bigotry to keep him warm at night. People dead in Bali: bomb Iraq. People killed by their own security forces in Russia: bomb Iraq. Fox cancels Girl's Club: bomb Iraq. The fact that Saddam's Iraq is a secular dictatorship isn't any reason to not blow it up to get at those Islamo-fascists who don't reside there.

    Maybe Ashcroft will let Andy give the needle to John Muhammad and they can both get off on it. Then Andy can feel like he's part of the war on terrorism.

    It's as close as he'll ever get...and he knows it.


    posted by tbogg at 8:51 PM

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    Beating the Neo-Hawks like a rented donkey....

    The Village Voice's Richard Goldstein takes on Leftists Who Love the War Too Much

    Greil Marcus is a discerning radical humanist. So it was a shock to pick up the progressive paper First of the Month and find him dissing leftist intellectuals for their skepticism about the war on terror. Marcus is not the only member of the counterculturati to find the hawk within. Dan Savage, the shoot-from-the-hip sex columnist, has lately become hip to the shoot. Then there's Christopher Hitchens, the ex-socialist who has found an occasion in 9-11 to revise his ideological profile. He is now a latter-day incarnation of the Cold War liberal. Hitchens's recent homage to George Orwell includes a remarkable defense of his work for the British government during the McCarthy era, when Orwell supplied lists of suspected com-symps, dutifully noting who was homosexual—or Jewish. Hey, says Hitchens, Orwell wasn't lying.

    I can't think of any comparable example of bad faith among the neohawks, but I do have some thoughts about what makes them run. For one thing, there's a real temptation to leave the chronic depression and ample masochism of the left behind. The war on terror can seem like an opening to build a muscular new progressivism with its feet on the ground. And speaking of feet, there's an undeniable satisfaction in kicking a masochist while he's down. Among the many rewards for sadism these days is the power it confers—and for progressives power is in terribly short supply. Finally, never underestimate the appeal to a critic of being taken seriously, and that means declaring your independence from left-wing "orthodoxies."


    posted by tbogg at 7:04 PM

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    ...and from now on Rummy wants to be refered as "Peggy Fleming"...

    Taking precious time out from making up phoney-baloney connections between Saddam and al Qaeda, Donald Rumsfeld signed a memo making the President the sole "Commander in Chief".

    Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld has issued a memorandum reserving the title for the president, and discontinuing its use for military officers who head the U.S. military's nine regional and unified combatant commands

    "This makes official a rule that the secretary ordered a number of months ago," Deputy Assistant Defense Secretary Bryan Whitman, a senior Pentagon (news - web sites) spokesman, said on Tuesday.

    Whitman told Reuters that Rumsfeld had determined that the practice of calling each of the regional U.S. military commanders around the world "commander in chief" of his or her area was incorrect, and that "combatant commander" was more appropriate.

    So this is your new Official Commander in Chief... (Warning to cubicle monkeys...contains sound)

    Boy. The Supreme Court can sure pick'em.....


    posted by tbogg at 6:51 PM

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    This explains soooo much about Erika Harold....

    Early loss of virginity 'leads to less stress'

    The earlier a woman has sex, the less stressed she is as an adult, scientists have discovered.

    When they questioned women about their sexual history and tested them for levels of a stress hormone, they found that the lowest levels were among those who had sex the earliest. A similar but smaller effect was found for men.

    In the research, carried out at the University of Tübingen in Germany, volunteers completed questionnaires, and had their saliva tested for levels of cortisol before and after they were exposed to the stresses of preparing to speak in public to strangers for five minutes and perform mental arithmetic aloud. The body secretes increased amounts of cortisol in response to stress.

    Stress levels were up to 60 per cent lower in women who lost their virginity before their 18th birthday.

    So, to recap:
    Lack of sex causes stress.
    Prolonged virginity creates more stress.
    Wearing a tiara, greasing your teeth up with Vaseline, and being a humorless prig causes extended periods of virginity which causes stress, which probably comes from knowing that your classmates are pooling their milk money to bust a cap in your tight ass.

    Tomorrow we discuss: Hot tiara on tiara action and why guys dig it....


    posted by tbogg at 6:28 PM

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    "Think we ought to do something about that knife in his back?"

    An Omaha teen-ager couldn't shake a headache last weekend after doctors stitched up what they thought was a cut.

    Turns out he had been shot in the head.






    posted by tbogg at 6:08 PM

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    Clarence Thomas: "There, but for the grace of God, go I...."

    Teen arrested after pulling a starter gun in attempted porn rental



    posted by tbogg at 6:04 PM

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    I could not make these up...

    The quotes below are complaints reported by clients of Room 111, a public health clinic in St. Paul that treats people for sexually transmitted diseases. Nurses at the clinic began creating the list two decades ago; it now includes several hundred comments...

    Talk Dirty to Me


    posted by tbogg at 5:48 PM

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    Yee-haw...we got us another contest!

    According to The Note:

    Also, "Viking Penguin has made the winning but undisclosed seven-figure bid in the auction for George Bush confidant Karen Hughes's White House memoirs. The book, an account of Hughes's 'unique relationship with the president' and her life as a working mother and wife, is tentatively titled '10 Minutes from Normal.'"

    Since Karen is so busy hopscotching around the country bailing out faltering candidates, I thought we could, at least, help her with the title of her book about her "unique" relationship with GW Bush. Previously discarded titles include:

    -Hold Still While I Change Your Diaper!

    -You Can Come Out From Under The Desk Now...and Other Things I Told The President

    -It's "Nu-cle-ar" ...Now Say it. "Nu-cle-ar". C'mon. You Can Do It.

    -Speeches, Photo-Ops, and Screwing Laura: My Days and Nights With The President

    Submit your suggestions today before all the good names are taken. Suggestions to be posted Friday night!!!!

    E Mail me here









    posted by tbogg at 9:07 AM

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    Me! Me! Me! I want to kill him! Let me!....

    I sure am glad that the Federal Government wants to step in and prosecute Islamo-fascist and really bad role model, John Muhammed. For a while there, I was afraid that all of the states clamoring for their shot at Muhammed might settle down and just give him a slap on the wrist. But I knew that a Crisco-slathered John Ashcroft would come riding to the rescue once he was given the opportunity to prosecute a real live black man who also happens to be an infidel and an abomination in the eyes of a vengeful god who doesn't dance, drink, or have sex with willing and nubile twenty-year old surfer chicks that includes large, over-stuffed cushions and plenty of giggling and barking...

    But I digress...or maybe not....




    posted by tbogg at 8:41 AM

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    Midterms tomorrow and all I've got is a bottle of tequila and a case of beer. Time for a liquor run....

    Good news for Jenna Bush...

    NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - Enjoying a cocktail now and then is not associated with declining mental function over time and may even make women sharper, according to a new report.

    "Findings from this...study suggest that long-term social and habitual consumption of alcohol is not associated with an increased risk of cognitive decline in men and may even protect against cognitive decline in women," Constantine G. Lyketsos and colleagues from Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore, Maryland, write

    Which would explain Jenna's higher grades relative to pitchers of margarita's consumed. With the way she drinks, Jenna should make Phi Beta Kappa at U of T, or at least I Dranka Lotta...


    posted by tbogg at 8:16 AM

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    Bereaved family disses Dick

    The family of Sen. Paul Wellstone has asked Vice President Dick Cheney not to attend a public memorial service tonight in Minneapolis.

    Family members reportedly were upset by Republican campaign activities Tuesday

    Good for them.


    posted by tbogg at 8:03 AM

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    Well, after all, we didn't care that much for the first Bush, ourselves...I mean, we did fire him...

    Paul Wolfowitz (Mary Kate to Richard Perle's Ashley) thinks that President Clinton let Saddam "get off lightly," following Iraq's 1993 attempt on the life of former President George H. W. Bush.

    You know, we had just fired the guy because he wasn't up to the job, so it's not like we were all, you know, gonna get in a war over him and stuff. I mean, jeez, all ol' #41 ever did was breed drunks and other criminals.....

    Clinton launched 23 Tomahawk missiles against the headquarters Iraqi intelligence in June 1993, after receiving "compelling evidence" that the Iraqi dictator intended to kill the elder Bush while he visited Kuwait.

    "We must confront this enormous appetite for revenge and consider also that Saddam Hussein might have concluded from that event that he could risk an extraordinarily dangerous act and get away with it," Wolfowitz told the Association of Old Crows' annual conference.

    Attendees of the Old Crow's meeting included Phyllis Schlafly, Kate O'Beirne, Barbara Bush, Mona Charen, High Grand Supreme Crone Lynn Cheney, and Ann Coulter whose biological clock is at 3 minutes until crone-hood......


    posted by tbogg at 7:51 AM

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    Stuck inside of Mobile with a bunch of dorks again...

    MOBILE, Ala., Oct. 29 — A plane carrying three U.S. senators bound for a campaign event in Missouri landed in Alabama after pilots reported problems with the landing gear, a Republican official said late Monday.

    ANN WAGNER, co-chairwoman of the Republican National Committee and the Missouri Republican chairwoman, said that a plane carrying Senate Minority Leader Trent Lott, R-Miss., and Sens. Peter Fitzgerald, R-Ill., and Rick Santorum, R-Pa., reported problems with its landing gear and landed at Mobile.

    Repeat after me: I must not think bad thoughts, I must not think bad thoughts.....rinse, repeat....



    posted by tbogg at 7:37 AM

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    Monday, October 28, 2002

     

    No one left to care...

    Hitchens. (Sorry, but it's a Salon Premium article and I refuse to give Talbott any money that might go to Andy Sullivan.)

    Christopher Hitchens talks about his beef with the Nation, the "filthy menace" of Saddam Hussein, and how the left ceded its moral credibility by opposing the war against Islamic fascism

    Maybe it's me, but does anyone really care about Chris Hitchens? Isn't this just a case of media navel-gazing regarding a very minor journalist/celebrity? I mean, jeez, this guy is sooooo big that, coupled in a panel with Andy Sullivan, they managed to draw a whole 200 people to a seminar at NYU. 200 ? That's friggin embarassing (if Hitch and Sully were capable of being embarassed). Outside of Richard Hatch from Survivor has there ever been so much written about someone who is such a flyspeck in the cultural landscape?

    Somebody wake me when the sodden twit is discovered drowned in a pool of his own vomit...


    posted by tbogg at 10:09 PM

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    Stupid Cop, Bad Cop

    over at The Self Made Pundit.


    posted by tbogg at 9:53 PM

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    Nursing Student Exercises Second Amendment Rights....

    NRA ignores it.



    posted by tbogg at 9:48 PM

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    Hi. I'm Erika Harold. I'll be your tour guide to Fantasyland....

    Salon has an article up on Erika Harold. Who? You know...Miss America?

    This is the first time I've actually seen a picture of Ms. Harold and I was suprised to see that she looks a bit like a mocha version of Paula Jones, minus the penis-nose. Now we all know that she raised a bit of a stink because she wants to promote sexual abstinence as Miss America, under the mistaken belief that teenagers give a Britney's ass what she thinks, but I thought this little tidbit about her younger life was interesting:

    Harold responded to the "encouragement" by sticking to the subject of youth violence during the national pageant and immediately after, when she flew to Brussels for the launch of the World Health Organization's Report on Violence and Health, and garnered the support of several other social and political advocacy groups, including the Anti-Defamation League and the National Center for Victims of Crime. She repeated a litany of heartbreaking stories about the racial and sexual harassment she suffered in the ninth grade, a brutal time in which she said she was called a whore and a slut, and discovered that kids were pooling lunch money to buy a rifle to kill her.

    ...and I liked this from People magazine:

    Even Harold's tormenters may not fully understand what prompted their cruelties. "She dressed to get attention and was kind of shallow and naive," says an unrepentant former male classmate who took part in the harassment (and wants to remain anonymous). "Some of the teasing definitely went over the line, but what Erika got was what's pretty typical in high school."

    So basically Erika is .....Tracy Flick.




    posted by tbogg at 9:40 PM

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    Bush's poll numbers approaching his IQ

    Okay. It's Dick Morris, Fox, and NewsMax which is the trifecta of stupidity, but you got to love the part where Morris calls President Cowardly Lyin' a "pussy";

    A new Fox News Dynamics poll set for release Tuesday shows that President Bush's job approval numbers are plummeting.

    "There has been a major development in the polling, according to the Fox News poll that was completed on Friday," former White House political guru Dick Morris told Fox News Channel's "Hannity & Colmes."

    "Bush has really been hit in the last two weeks with a big fall," the top strategist revealed.

    snip

    "Bush, on the one hand, is telling the American people that we have this super-crisis with Iraq," the top consultant explained. "And then he futzes with Paris and the United Nations, he campaigns in South Carolina eating rubber chicken, and he's not acting like a president whose country is under siege."

    Morris said that Bush needs to "set a deadline for the U.N., stop negotiating with France - stop looking like a p---y."

    Apparently NewsMax is tooooooo delicate to spell it out. Carl Limbacher is such a pussy.

    I await the latest from Andy Sullivan decrying anti-pussy bigotry.....






    posted by tbogg at 9:13 PM

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    The TV habits of President Boy Meets World...

    Apparently George W Bush, whose curiosity only extends to trying to see what happens when he puts his tongue in a wall socket, doesn't want to see anything that conflicts with his limited world view..

    Before President Bush boards Air Force One, his staff makes sure that the plane's TVs are tuned to nearly anything other than cable news. Otherwise, Bush might spot CNN or FOX NEWS and demand, as he has in the past,"Who turned that on?!"

    NYT White House reporter Elisabeth Bumiller has filed a report set for Tuesday's Page Ones which reveals details of Bush's in-air sanctuary.

    I'm guessing that ESPN might be the most challenging thing he ever sees outside of Blues Clues and Facts of Life reruns...


    posted by tbogg at 8:58 PM

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    Walter to the rescue...

    Looks like the good folks over at Democratic Underground are going to get their wish and Walter Mondale is going to fill in for Wellstone.

    Republicans began to gear up Monday to oppose former Vice President Walter Mondale, who appears likely to step in as a Senate candidate after Sen. Paul Wellstone was killed in an airplane crash on Friday. Democrats need to keep the Minnesota seat to help protect their one-seat Senate edge. Republican candidate Norm Coleman has suspended his campaign at least until after a memorial service for Wellstone is held Tuesday.

    REPUBLICANS MONDAY questioned Mondale’s readiness, noting he has not held elective office since 1981 and has not run a campaign since losing by a landslide to Ronald Reagan in 1984

    I believe that 1984 is also the last time Strom Thurmond had a bowel movement, but you don't hear the Democrats mentioning that (thank the imaginary deity of your choice). So while Strom Thurmond and Jesse Helms are sharing a double room and ventilator at Walter Reed, and they have to keep Dick Cheney away from microwaves, lest he crumple to the floor and start flopping like a landed trout, the Republicans are questioning Mondale's "readiness". Give me a friggin' break.

    It's 2002 and Bush, Cheney, Rice, and Rummy are running the goverment like it was 1954, but without the family values...



    posted by tbogg at 8:35 PM

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    I'll be out in time for the tailgate before the Packers game, right?

    Wisconsin has the nicest criminals.

    GREEN BAY, Wis. - Police officers probably wish all car chases were this easy.

    A 22-year-old Green Bay man led police on a chase that often moved as slowly as 20 mph and ended in the Brown County Jail's parking lot. The man parked his pickup in the jail's lot, smoked a cigarette, got out of the truck and lay face-down on the ground to be arrested, police said.

    He allegedly told the officers he knew he was drunk and was going to be sent to jail, so he just drove himself there

    A twenty mile per hour chase? With a little less cheese, brats, and beer the police should have been able to run him down on foot...



    posted by tbogg at 4:02 PM

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    If his name was Bush, he'd still be watching his wife strip for a living....

    Henry Alfonso had the bad luck to be born with the wrong last name.

    Henry Alfonso was arrested for allegedly dealing the prescription painkiller OxyContin. But he's in prison now because a small adhesive patch on his arm tested positive for traces of cocaine.

    Alfonso's case is the first in Massachusetts to challenge the reliability of the sweat patches, which are used by federal courts across the country to test for various drugs, including cocaine, heroin, marijuana and methamphetamines.

    Alfonso, 32, insists he has never used cocaine. He claims the six positive test results he has had since April were caused either by cocaine residue left in his apartment by a previous tenant or traces of the drug that may have been on cash his wife brought home from her job as a stripper.

    Alfonso was arrested in December for allegedly attempting to buy OxyContin from an undercover agent and mailing OxyContin from Florida. After he was released on bail, probation officials began applying the patch on Alfonso each week to test him for drug use. Three months ago, after one of the patches tested positive for cocaine, Alfonso was sent to jail.

    Bummer. This could have been him.

    Given his choice...maybe not.





    posted by tbogg at 3:51 PM

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    We could send Paul O'Neill...he cries convincingly....

    The Bush administration can't decide who is going to represent it at Paul Wellstone's memorial service:

    Q: Can you tell me -- us, who is going to Wellstone's memorial service?

    MR. FLEISCHER: Yes, the memorial service is on Tuesday. We are ascertaining who the appropriate official will be. We will have something to say on that tomorrow.

    Q: Who is that memorial service for? I didn't catch that.

    MR. FLEISCHER: Senator Wellstone.

    Q: Is there any chance the President will go?

    MR. FLEISCHER: No. If you take a look at the historical record of when a sitting senator dies in office, no the President will not go. This has not been the past pattern. We will send an appropriate official.

    Apparently Bush can't attend because government scientists working around the clock have yet to come up with an anti-smirk potion for President Might Be Struck By Lightning. The administration also doesn't want to send Vice President Dick Cheney because they are afraid he'll be interred by mistake, which would be really embarassing, but perfectly understandable...

    Does this also mean that, should Strom Thurmond elect to take a dirt nap in the next couple of weeks, Bush will avoid Strom's funeral like a mandatory military drug test?


    posted by tbogg at 11:41 AM

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    Sunday, October 27, 2002

     

    Making the CIA & FBI look good

    You know, Tom DeLay probably could have told Putin that the gas was a bad idea. Are we supposed to attack Russia now that they're gassing their own people.? Does Russia now join the Axis of Evil with Iraq, Iran, and North Korea?

    This puts a considerable amount of pressure on President Get Your War On, as he assembles his International coalition against Iraq, officially dubbed the Axis Bold As Love, currently made up of England, Australia, Spineless Democrats and the Duchy of Grand Fenwick.


    posted by tbogg at 10:09 PM

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    Then again, how do we tell if Jeb! wasn't lying back then like he does now?

    Holy! Shit! Jeb! endorses! McBride!

    (Warning link contains sound as well as images of Jeb! who would be the personification of evil in Florida if it weren't for Katherine Harris...Another warning: link to Harris may cause sterility or at least make your dick go as dead as Bob Dole's).



    posted by tbogg at 9:56 PM

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    Finally...some good news.

    TPM looks at the how some of the races are shaping up.


    posted by tbogg at 9:47 PM

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    Fashion fox pas

    Just finished watching the Fox Sports World Series post-game awards ceremony and it occurred to me that someone really needs to tell Jeannie Zelasko that a three-strand pearl choker is really not a suitable fashion accessory at a sporting event. Usually they're only worn by a naked oiled-up woman in Penthouse magazine, photographed licking a five-inch stiletto heel of a pump worn by another naked woman.

    Oh yeah. Congratulations Angels. Now go get some starting pitching.....



    posted by tbogg at 9:43 PM

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    Sorry. No money for smaller classrooms..I gave it all to my brother, the Savings & Loan defrauder...

    Why is this not suprising in the least?

    TALLAHASSEE, Fla. -- A software company run by Neil Bush, a younger brother of Gov. Jeb Bush, hopes to sell a program to Florida schools that students would use to prepare for the test that is key to the governor's education policy

    snip

    Ignite spokeswoman Louise Thacker denied the company had an unfair advantage because its founder and CEO, Neil Bush, is a brother of Florida's governor.

    A spokeswoman for the state Department of Education said Friday that Ignite officials had not approached the state about its product. Mike Eason, formerly the top technology official for the department, is a member of an Ignite advisory board.

    Katie Muniz, a spokeswoman for Gov. Bush, said the governor has never talked with his brother about the business

    At which point polygraphs throughout Florida commenced exploding, sending up great mushroom clouds of debris darkening the sky just like a Left Behind novel.

    As for Neil:

    Neil Bush gained notoriety as director of the Silverado Savings & Loan in Colorado, whose failure cost taxpayers $1 billion and led to a grand jury investigation during the term of his father, President George H.W. Bush. Neil Bush was never charged.

    These guys make the Gotti's look like Osmonds.








    posted by tbogg at 9:34 PM

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    Honey? Can you get the door? I think it's for you...

    Actually this would be a good way to answer the door when the Mormon's come a knockin'...


    posted by tbogg at 9:21 PM

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    We have always been at war with Saddam...or: Does Andy Sullivan ever read what he writes?

    Andy Sullivan writes:

    THE ORWELL DEBATE: Sadly, it was mobbed. The hall was far too small to accommodate the crowds and many were turned away. I can't believe NYU doesn't have a larger hall than one that sits a couple hundred at most. But once it got under way, the event was great.

    We now know that two hundred people constitutes a "mob". Would this mean that, say, 300 people would be a massive crush of humanity? But that's quibbling. Let's move on to more important matters:

    Hitch was splendid - half after-dinner jokester, half passionate moralist. He made one point in particular that resonated. On the way there, we were confronted with protestors with "No War On Iraq" posters. Hitch noticed the Orwellian resonance of this slogan. The slogan, strictly speaking, is a lie, one of many promoted by the anti-war left and right. There is no possibility of a war with "Iraq." Half the country - inhabited by the Kurds and Shia Muslims is already protected from Saddam's murderous designs by British and American air-power. The remaining rump is not a country as such; it's a population terrorized by a police state run by a sadistic maniac. We are not therefore at war with the country or people of Iraq; and by equating Saddam with Iraq, these so-called "peace-protestors" are de facto parties to his vile propaganda, the notion that Iraq is Saddam and Saddam is Iraq.

    It seems that Andy has decided to take control of the language.

    I'm sure the people of Iraq will will make this all important distinction that we are not really at war with them when the bombs start falling on Baghdad...unless, of course, they die in the "war-that-is-not-really-a-war" , in which case the distinction will probably be lost for eternity. And if Saddam should retaliate against American cities, which he has shown no inkling of even attempting, I personally will rationalize this (body counts and all) and take solace in the fact that Saddam is really only at "war" with George W Bush, the unelected President.

    So remember... if we are at war with Iraq, we really aren't at war with Iraq. We're just the collateral damage in a pissing match between a maniac, a drunken fratboy deserter, and the oil companies that pull his strings.










    posted by tbogg at 9:16 PM

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    Saturday, October 26, 2002

     

    Things you really don't want to know

    Want to know about Kathie Lee Gifford's first sexual experience?

    Yeah. Me neither, but it's not near as creepy as Celine Dion's.

    Go on. Click on it. You know you want to...


    posted by tbogg at 8:05 PM

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    Yes. That's why they call it dope...

    Two Men Busted For Drying Marijuana, Right Under Cop's Nose

    Chattanooga Police tell us two men were driving along Rossville Boulevard with two hefty sacks of marijuana. It needed to be dried out.

    They had what they thought was a brilliant idea; to pull into the Fast Food and Fuel convenience store at the intersection with 28th Street because they have a microwave oven inside.

    That was about 7:30 Friday morning, about the time an officer's patrol car was parked outside.

    Yeah. I've never seen any police around a Mini-mart, that sells donuts and coffee, at 7:30 in the morning.

    But police say Rudy Raines went inside, saw Officer David Ashley, spoke to him for a moment, then went right over to the microwave oven. And yes, he put his stash into the oven, turned up the heat, and filled the store with the aroma of marijuana.

    I have nothing to add to this.....




    posted by tbogg at 7:57 PM

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    Can you speak up a little louder?

    Bush wants America to speak with one voice.

    Can you hear me now?

    Now?
    Now?
    Now?
    Now?
    Now?
    Now?
    Now?
    Now?
    Now?
    Now?

    How about from here?

    Germany?
    Japan?
    Puerto Rico?
    Indonesia?
    Pakistan?
    Honduras?
    Chile?
    Italy?

































    posted by tbogg at 5:43 PM

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    Hey! I'm trying to act all sincere over here! No. Really!

    Andy on Wellstone:

    In New York today, I just heard of Senator Wellstone's death, and that of his wife, daughter and colleagues. I disagreed with a huge amount of what he believed in, but he was one of the most sincere, passionate and genuine people in American politics today. This is terrible news for all of us who value diversity of opinion and liveliness of debate in a democratic society. May he and all who died with him rest in peace.

    Yeah. In honor of the diversity of opinion that he so values, he created the von Hoffman, Raines, and Sontag awards.

    Thanks for caring, Andy.



    posted by tbogg at 5:11 PM

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    Harvey Pitt speaks! Harvey Pitt lies! Life in the Redundant Zone

    Harvey and the Pussycats pick tired old Republican hack to act all tough and stuff with the accounting industry.

    The Securities and Exchange Commission on Friday picked former FBI Director William H. Webster to head a new accounting oversight panel in a partisan vote that symbolized how politically charged accounting reform has become in the current climate of financial scandal.

    In a 3-2 vote, SEC Chairman Harvey L. Pitt and two other Republican commissioners chose Webster and four other candidates -- including former California pension official Kayla J. Gillan -- over more than 450 applicants to serve on the Public Company Accounting Oversight Board.

    The vote came at the end of an hourlong meeting marked by acrimony and impassioned speeches on both sides.

    The decision left SEC Commissioners Harvey Goldschmid and Roel Campos -- both Democrats -- disappointed because they had favored John H. Biggs, a New York pension fund executive with a reputation for backing tough new regulations for the accounting industry.

    The rancor over Webster's appointment comes as investors and policymakers are looking to the SEC to restore confidence in corporate bookkeeping. A wave of accounting scandals began last year when evidence surfaced that energy trader Enron Corp. used off-the-books partnerships and questionable accounting practices to hide its deteriorating financial condition. Enron's main auditor -- accounting firm Arthur Andersen -- was convicted in June of obstruction of justice for shredding Enron financial documents.

    Campos said the rejection of Biggs underscores the perception that the SEC remains too closely aligned with the interests of the accounting industry, which had lobbied for Webster. He predicted that the board would face a legal challenge from disgruntled reform advocates, hampering the board's effectiveness. Others discounted that possibility, however.

    Pitt made an emotional defense of his choice of Webster, saying he was not pressured by the accounting industry to back the former FBI director.

    "I am fiercely independent. I am beholden to no one," Pitt said.

    Later Pitt headed off to the Mustang Ranch in Nevada to pick up his Whore of the Year Award.

    Just like last week when the press when to Son of Sam for his opinions on the Washington Sniper, yesterday they went to Phi Gramm for his opinion on this choice:

    Echoing the comments of many of his fellow Republicans, Sen. Phil Gramm of Texas called the SEC's new accounting panel "a quality board, which all objective observers will find acceptable.... For someone to criticize Chairman Pitt for not nominating their choice of chairman, or members, over the choice of the majority of the commission seems to me unfair and wholly political."

    This of course is the same Phil Gramm who has been holding the Financial markets coats while they have raped the shareholders and the general public. And should we mention his wife Wendy Gramm who was on the audit commitee and board at Enron, and was shocked, shocked I tell you, at what shennanigans were going on under carefully averted eyes? Nah. We'll leave that to the business reporters who should be reporting on this any day now....

    By the way Phil, good luck at your new job.

    There is corruption, and then there is Noah Cross-type corruption. The kind that is so evil that it never sees the light of day.


    posted by tbogg at 5:04 PM

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    Friday, October 25, 2002

     

    Sullivan, Bigotry, and Harry Belafonte

    Salon, which still carries Andy Sullivan because Sully must have pictures of David Talbott with a goat or something, has Sullivan's latest article up on Harry Belafonte and bigotry. I was going to write something about this, but Rittenhouse and Ehrenstein both said it so much better. Then again, they're both professional writers. Me? I'm just a smart-ass. But a funny smart-ass.


    posted by tbogg at 6:15 PM

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    Give credit where credit is due

    Peggy Noonan wrote some nice things about Wellstone. It is very heartfelt.

    Although her comment about Candy Crowley was laughable....


    posted by tbogg at 6:04 PM

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    Friday fun

    Couldn't leave you this evening without a little Friday Fun Time.

    Name that Beard


    posted by tbogg at 5:58 PM

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    I guess we shouldn't have farmed this out to Rush's fact-checkers...

    I guess all Aronbergs look alike in Florida.

    A campaign mailing for Republican Frank Mann blasts his opponent for a lawsuit that allegedly resulted in less money for public schools.

    But the Dave Aronberg who filed the lawsuit is not the same Dave Aronberg who's running against Mann for Senate District 27.

    The attack focuses on a lawsuit filed by a different Dave Aronberg against the Palm Beach County school system three years ago.

    The person who filed the suit is David T. Aronberg, who practices law in Boca Raton.

    The Democratic candidate running against Mann is David A. Aronberg, an assistant attorney general in West Palm Beach

    This isn't the first time that a Republican has had T & A problems in Florida.


    posted by tbogg at 3:11 PM

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    Out of tragedy....

    State Officials Consider Wellstone Replacement

    State Democratic party officials say they have not yet begun to think about a replacement for Wellstone on the ballot, but acknowledged that they would quickly have to do so. Privately, sources said one name being floated around was Alan Page, an African-American state Supreme Court justice and former Minnesota Vikings football player. Former senator and vice president Walter Mondale is another name being kicked around by political insiders

    Oh my. Wouldn't that be interesting....Alan Page.

    Karl Rove must be having a stroke at the thought of that....


    posted by tbogg at 1:44 PM

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    Lisa Beamer gets a royalty check everytime they play the school fightsong

    Federal Way's Beamer High will honor 9/11 hero

    FEDERAL WAY -- For the students at the new high school opening next year, it should be easy to choose a slogan to boost school spirit: "Are you guys ready? Let's roll!"

    That's because the school will be named for the man who made that phrase famous: Todd Beamer, the passenger on a plane hijacked Sept. 11, 2001, who is credited with helping to lead an assault on the terrorists aiming the jet at Washington, D.C. The plane, United Airlines Flight 93, instead crashed into a field in Pennsylvania, killing all aboard

    I love this:

    For Justin Drayer, a Kilo Junior High student who lives in the Beamer High attendance zone, the name choice is a good one.

    "He was, like, all heroic and stuff," Justin said yesterday. "If he wasn't there, the plane would have crashed into the White House. It was pretty amazing."

    ...and this:

    Justin voted for Beamer in a non-binding poll of the 1,600 students bound for the new school.

    So did Olga Kondratyev, a Kilo eighth-grader.

    "He, like, fought for our country, and he deserves it," Olga said.

    So lets, like, roll, or, you know, whatever...

    (thanks to alert reader sbk for this one)



    posted by tbogg at 1:29 PM

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    "Is it irresponsible to speculate? It would be irresponsible not to." More Noonan Notes.

    This week Peggy takes on the Washington Sniper.

    It's over. Or at least it appears to be. Black October is over, and the children around Washington can once again feel safe, or as safe as children these days are allowed to feel. They're all little veterans of national trauma now.

    When I told my son Thursday morning--I stuck my head in his room and said, "They caught the snipers, it's over"--relief washed across his face like a series of small waves. "Who was it?" he asked. "Are they sure?" He wanted the facts so he could put a picture together in his mind. The picture would be of a monster locked hard behind bars, an unarmed monster in chains.

    But then Peggy takes us on E-Ticket ride to Conjectureland:

    What a surprise, the profile of the oldest suspect. I imagined a brilliant Ted Bundy-type serial killer, not a more competent Richard Reid or a more elusive Timothy McVeigh, which is how John Allen Muhammad looks to me, at least at the moment. No one who knew him is talking so far of his intellectual gifts. I was also imagining a cell of al Qaeda operatives, not an unaffiliated two-man crew. But then soon we may find out what mosque Muhammad frequented, if any, and what friends he had there, if any, and what assistance he received, if any, and the story may change.

    snip

    Soon we'll probably see the pictures of Muhammad posing in the backyard with his rifle, as we did with Oswald. Soon we'll probably hear reports of abuse of his wives, as Oswald abused his. Soon we'll hear the facts of his conversion to his new belief. Communism, radical Islam--authoritarian ideologies always seem to promise a sense of coherence to the truly lost.

    snip

    If they are charged and tried it is hard not to guess that it will be some trial, with Muhammad making speeches, perhaps demanding to represent himself, perhaps eager to tell America how it is evil, a victimizer of the weak of the world, a victimizer of the Muhammads of the world.

    Peggy has taken on the great American disease...leaping ahead of the facts. Repeated readings of Tom Clancy have made the average man on the street think he's a cold war military planner and geo-political strategist. CSI and Thomas Harris books make us feel that we too can be profilers and crime scene investigators. The X-Files teach us that there is a conspiracy behind even the most banal of events (see my own note below on the Wellstone crash). I realize that Ms Noonan is not a journalist, but rather a 'pundit', but since Muhammad was just arrested yersterday shouldn't we wait on just a few facts to get out before trying to make this into a worldwide conspiracy that, if the administration gets it's way, leads back to saddam Hussein... so, hey, let's go bomb him?

    Noonan would love for this guy to be an al Qaeda supporter because it would fit into her neat little vision of the world. But it's more likely he's just a guy who took his perceived grievances on the road, shot some people to make himself feel more in control of the external world, and thought he would pick up some cash while doing it.

    Until Muhammad talks, no one really knows, but the chatter of conjecture seems to fill the air.




    posted by tbogg at 1:07 PM

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    Why do you think they call it "flash photography"?

    A nude man who flashes his victims, then takes a photo of them with a camera as he exposes himself, struck twice in Columbus on Oct. 15.

    One incident was at about 6 p.m. on the northeast side, near Gahanna, at an apartment complex just north of Morse and Cherrybottom roads. The other was at about 8:35 p.m. in the 200 block of Broadmeadows Boulevard in Clintonville.


    posted by tbogg at 12:38 PM

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    He ate my homework and shot me in the foot

    BROOKLYN PARK, Minn. -- Pheasant season took an ugly turn for Michael Murray when he was shot by Sonny, his year-old English setter pup.

    The puppy knew something was very wrong when Murray dropped to the ground with blood spurting from his ankle. "Sonny just laid by my side," Murray said. "He knew something was bad."

    Maybe the NRA can set up a gun education project for dogs like they have for kids. They can call the mascot: Eddie Beagle.


    posted by tbogg at 12:35 PM

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    Idle hands and an empty mind are the Devil's playground

    Won't you please help. Give what you can.

    My fellow Americans and concerned members of the international community:

    In the last few months, it has become increasingly apparent that the Bush administration is locked on course for a full-scale military invasion of Iraq. Nothing, it appears, will deter our President and his advisors from such an action. Saddam's acceptance of U.N. weapons inspectors has been played down by the administration, and the general disapproval of other countries, as well as their refusal to participate, has led only to arrogant posturing from our leader. The President's speeches have reflected this determination in the past months, as references to America's flagging economy have been phased out gradually in favor of fiery rhetoric about Saddam Hussein and his alleged weapons of mass destruction


    posted by tbogg at 12:29 PM

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    Not to go all tinfoil-hat, but I just don't like the looks of this...

    Paul Wellstone

    My hope is that Jesse Ventura will do the right thing. I feel bad for the remaining Wellstones, worse for Minnestota, and even worse for the United States.

    So what is Walter Mondale up to these days?


    posted by tbogg at 11:43 AM

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    Knowing a man by the friends he keeps...

    More proof that Bush hates Americans.

    WASHINGTON, Oct. 24 — The Bush administration is closely monitoring a private lawsuit accusing members of the Saudi royal family of ties to Al Qaeda, and may move in a federal court here to dismiss or delay the suit, which was brought by relatives of Sept. 11 victims, according to administration officials.

    Government laywers, the officials said, are trying to determine whether the case threatens to damage Saudi-American relations, which would give them reason to block the suit. The suit seeks $1 trillion in damages and is being pursued here by nearly 3,000 of the relatives

    Bush will spin this as part of "tort reform"...


    posted by tbogg at 8:50 AM

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    Took the night off, last night, so let's get started...

    For weeks it was Iraq, Iraq, Iraq...then it was sniper, sniper, sniper, now that President Books About Bunnies has his resolution, and the sniper has been caught, we can all relax now, right?

    Nope.

    FBI: al-Qaida rail strikes possible

    Can't have the common folk suddenly realizing that the economy is falling apart, better to keep them distracted. Karl Rove would have driven the getaway car if he could have kept the sniper story going for three more weeks. And if a few more people were killed, Rove would have thought of it as 'taking one for the team'": Bush's team.

    Bush's America...if you aren't living in fear, you're paying attention to the things they don't want you to see.



    posted by tbogg at 8:45 AM

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